my first post

FinallyaMrs1987

hi everyone! this is my first post and i wasnt sure which board i should post on, but i just wanted to share my story.
FI and i met in 2010 and quickly realized how much we wanted to share our lives together. we have been engaged for a year and are planning a wedding in june (so soon!! i cant wait!). we were able to combine both of our visions into what we think is the perfect wedding and are so excited to celebrate our life together with our family and friends.
unfortunately my dad was recently admitted into hospice. i want him to be able to see me get married and be part of all the celebration but his doctors are not sure if he will make it til june, so we have decided to do a small ceremony in a week with just my immediate family and FI immediate family. i am so appreciative of our families for being flexible to make it possible for my dad to partake in my wedding! it really makes me want to be a part of FI's family even more!
i am still hopeful that my dad will be present at our ceremony and reception in june but if not at least i will be at peace that he got to take part in such a big moment of my life.

sorry this was kind of long but thanks for listening! happy planning to all the other brides out there!!

Yellobat

Wow, what a sad story at what should be a really happy time!  I hope your dad can make it to your celebration in June.  It would be wonderful if he could do a father-daughter dance with you or something traditional like that to make it even more special for you.  I hope you enjoy having him there next week and I hope you enjoy celebrating your love with the man of your dreams with both your families and friends in June, even if he's not there to celebrate with you.  You know he'll be with you in spirit and want you to have fun.  It sounds like you've both put a lot of thought into planning a wonderful celebration.  This should be a time of just bliss, so I'm sorry this is such a damper on it all.  Let us know what happens!

thejucheidea

So you're having a blessing now and then having the actual wedding later? Because you can only have one ceremony; you can only get married once to the same person unless you get divorced and remarry.

There's a poster on here, audrewuh, whose father died a few weeks ago from lung cancer. When his doctors said that they didn't think that he'd make it to the wedding (which is tomorrow), they gathered close loved ones, their pastor and their photographer for a blessing of their relationship, but not legally binding them as husband and wife. A picture from the blessing is in this thread: http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wr-aw-im-12-days-away

You might want to consider something like that if you're wanting to do a private thing with your family rather than getting 'married' twice.

FinallyaMrs1987

it makes me sad that other people are in/have been in the same situation. life just has bad timing sometimes. : the blessing is a great idea and that girl gave me some good ideas to incorporate my dad if he is not able to be present in June. neither of our families are religious and neither are FI and i. we actually are not being married by a pastor so i am not sure if a blessing would really make sense/be something we are comfortable with personally. we just want a way for my dad to be part of the actual ceremony and watch us commit ourselves to one another. we are including a piece in our wedding program that will explain about the prior ceremony even though the majority of guests are aware of the situation with my dad so hopefully that will clear up any potential confusion.

annmarie714

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_my-first-post?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:ced5347c-6b84-4a78-ab01-e636f0b7e85fPost:193bbf93-3338-4934-a394-79b3c60e778c">Re:my first post</a>:
[QUOTE]it makes me sad that other people are in/have been in the same situation. life just has bad timing sometimes. : the blessing is a great idea and that girl gave me some good ideas to incorporate my dad if he is not able to be present in June. neither of our families are religious and neither are FI and i. we actually are not being married by a pastor so i am not sure if a blessing would really make sense/be something we are comfortable with personally. we just want a way for my dad to be part of the actual ceremony and watch us commit ourselves to one another. we are including a piece in our wedding program that will explain about the prior ceremony even though the majority of guests are aware of the situation with my dad so hopefully that will clear up any potential confusion.
Posted by FinallyaMrs1987[/QUOTE]

A situation like this is the only time I condone getting "married twice to the same person" and not side-eyeing it.  I can understand your reasoning and don't think it's an AW thing.  The blessing doesn't make sense in your situation d/t religious/non-religious reasons.  DO what you think is best and I hope your dad can see the big celebration in June. 

When the time comes, I hope he goes peacefully and feels no pain.