Tacky vs Rude

emeejeeayen

This is a general question I've been thinking about for a while now. What's the difference, in your opinion, between tacky and rude, and where do you see the overlap?

Sometimes on here people talk about things as being rude that I would define more as tacky. I haven't completely wrapped my brain around what I think the difference is, but I would put things such as tiered receptions in the rude category, cash bars somewhere in the middle, and listing registry information in an invite as tacky. 

Thoughts?

AddieCake

For me, tacky doesn't affect the guests but is just in poor taste, like cake smashing. Rude affects the guests, like not having chairs or having a cash bar. I agree we sometimes use them interchangeably when they probably aren't.

MuppetFan

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_tacky-vs-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:43fc590f-9eff-4b59-9c94-6c6c1b33d397Post:d285991c-8f48-4375-a226-04b193695cb7">Tacky vs Rude</a>:
[QUOTE]This is a general question I've been thinking about for a while now. What's the difference, in your opinion, between tacky and rude, and where do you see the overlap? Sometimes on here people talk about things as being rude that I would define more as tacky. I haven't completely wrapped my brain around what I think the difference is, but I would put things such as tiered receptions in the rude category, cash bars somewhere in the middle, and listing registry information in an invite as tacky.  Thoughts?
Posted by emeejeeayen[/QUOTE]

Good question. I typically think of them synonomously along the lines of tasteless.

Like the dresses on our tacky treasure hunt aren't rude, but a lot of them are pretty tasteless with the booms hanging out etc...and the lady who did a cake of herself...

Peledreamsofrain

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_tacky-vs-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:43fc590f-9eff-4b59-9c94-6c6c1b33d397Post:7d333bcd-d4e0-4a02-b6f2-69e4c9e594d2">Re: Tacky vs Rude</a>:
[QUOTE]For me, tacky doesn't affect the guests but is just in poor taste, like cake smashing. Rude affects the guests, like not having chairs or having a cash bar. I agree we sometimes use them interchangeably when they probably aren't.
Posted by AddieL73[/QUOTE]

<div>I agree with this distinction.  Tackiness, to me, denotes a lack of class.  Nobody is really harmed by wearing a slutty wedding dress, but everyone in the room is going to be thinking "That is tacky as hell".</div><div>
</div><div>Rudeness is when the line is crossed and people are inconvenienced.  </div><div>
</div><div>Things can certainly be BOTH tacky and rude, as well.  Dollar dances, to me, goes into this territory.  Coercion and guilting guests into parting with thier money is rude.  Pinning money onto a bride, or generally paying for a dancing woman is tacky.</div>

GoodLuckBear14

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_tacky-vs-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:43fc590f-9eff-4b59-9c94-6c6c1b33d397Post:33d75784-6b8f-4daf-916c-a2424264b004">Re: Tacky vs Rude</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Tacky vs Rude : I agree with this distinction.  Tackiness, to me, denotes a lack of class.  Nobody is really harmed by wearing a slutty wedding dress, but everyone in the room is going to be thinking "That is tacky as hell". Rudeness is when the line is crossed and people are inconvenienced.   Things can certainly be BOTH tacky and rude, as well.  Dollar dances, to me, goes into this territory.  Coercion and guilting guests into parting with thier money is rude.  Pinning money onto a bride, or generally paying for a dancing woman is tacky.
Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]

This.

banana468

I think even some of those could be rude Stage. For example, if you danced down the aisle in a house of worship with a booty shake or to a song that was not respectful, you've gone from tacky to rude since you're showing a lack of respect to the religion and guests. Wedding tackiness IMO can be the above but to be just tacky it can't be offensive.

AdeleDazeem

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_tacky-vs-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:43fc590f-9eff-4b59-9c94-6c6c1b33d397Post:d285991c-8f48-4375-a226-04b193695cb7">Tacky vs Rude</a>:
[QUOTE]This is a general question I've been thinking about for a while now. What's the difference, in your opinion, between tacky and rude, and where do you see the overlap? Sometimes on here people talk about things as being rude that I would define more as tacky. I haven't completely wrapped my brain around what I think the difference is, but I would put things such as tiered receptions in the rude category, cash bars somewhere in the middle, and listing registry information in an invite as tacky.  Thoughts?
Posted by emeejeeayen[/QUOTE]

If it goes against etiquette, then it's rude (cash bars, registry info on invitations).

If it goes against my personal tastes, then it's tacky.

lyndausvi

Ditto Joy.   (I've been saying that a lot lately)

Jen4948

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_tacky-vs-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:43fc590f-9eff-4b59-9c94-6c6c1b33d397Post:30f2cad5-a103-4753-8cad-021bf673ce8e">Re: Tacky vs Rude</a>:
[QUOTE]Ditto Joy.   (I've been saying that a lot lately)
Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE]

Second ditto.  (I find myself in agreement with you two a lot lately!)

QueerFemme

Koozies as favors = tacky.  Cash bars, not enough chairs = rude.