Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions

Other rolls for two close friends

I know this has been asked before but I'm really hoping someone has a creative idea! 

I have two very great friends that have helped me so much with wedding planning, but I already have 6 bridesmaids (all family) and don't want to add anymore. 

Other than "guest book attendant" and reading at the ceremony, does anyone know of other ways I can include/honor my friends?

Thanks :-)

Re: Other rolls for two close friends

  • Don't do Guest Book Attendant. That's a crap job.

    You don't need to come up with a role or a job for people to thank them for their help and kindness. Just write them each a heartfelt note of thanks, take some time at the wedding to hug them and thank them personally, and maybe give them a small gift if you'd like (gift card, wine, chocolates, a book or DVD you know they'd like, etc.).

    But if your main purpose is to include them in the wedding (rather than simply thank them for their help), you could have them participate in a religious or cultural ritual - light candles, hold huppah poles, bring up Communion, other cultural ceremonial things like lasso or tea if that is allowed - or if they can sing or play an instrument ask them to do that, or they can sign the license as the official witnesses, or be ushers.
    image
  • If you don't want to have them as a BM, they can read or do something at the ceremony (usher, religious participant, singer).  Other than that, just have them be a guest.

    Guest book attendants, program holder, cake cutter, whatever are all just jobs that annoy people.  Remember, being invited as a guest is an honor.
  • You could also mention on the back of your programs for all their help
    image. Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • I would just let them be guests and enjoy the fruits of all their hard work.  It would be nice to honor them with a corsage and a program mention (as well as a gift), but I don't think anything beyond that is necessary.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
  • Personal attendant is right up there as worst wedding job ever. 

    "Oh, hey, I don't have room for another BM.  Would you like to come to my wedding and work instead?  You can paint my nails and run errands for me!"  That's not an honor.
  • As for the other "rolls"~I suggest pumpernickel.

    As for the personal attendants:  where O where is retread when you need her?  Please DO NOT ask someone to be a PA.  I'll paraphrase retread:

    Would you, on any other day of your life, call up a friend and say "You're such a dear friend that I'm going to have you come over to my house for the BBQ I'm throwing today. You get to help me get dressed, do my errands, and follow me around all day, just in case I need something.  Everyone else will be enjoying the party.  Isn't that super of me?"

    If you wouldn't do that on Friday, December 4, why would it be a good idea on your wedding day?

    Making someone your brideslave for the day is NOT honoring them.  Let your friends come to your wedding and enjoy every minute as a carefree guest.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • "You don't need to come up with a role or a job for people to thank them for their help and kindness. Just write them each a heartfelt note of thanks, take some time at the wedding to hug them and thank them personally, and maybe give them a small gift if you'd like (gift card, wine, chocolates, a book or DVD you know they'd like, etc.)."

    I agree with this.  You could also invite them to the rehearsal dinner to show your appreciation.  If you absolutely want to include them I would not ask them to be a guest book attendant.  To me that would be a slap in the face.  They'll understand not being ask to be in the bridal party, but there's not thing worse than being asked to do a crappy job like that.

    Do either of them has any sort of musical talents? You could ask them to sing/play during the ceremony.  It would give a nice personal touch to the ceremony that both/all of you can cherish.  I play the piano, I would be honored if any of my friends asked me to play at their wedding.  

    Bottom line, don't ask them to do something you wouldn't want to do.  And don't ask them out of sympathy.  As was already mentioned, just being a guest at your wedding will be an honor. 
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