Any recent embarrassing moments?

harper0813

I had something embarrassing happen to me last night and I'm still all squirmy on the inside. If you tell me your stories it will make me feel less squirmy. I just want to be reminded that I'm not the only one who does dumb things sometimes... if you don't mind sharing!

Okay - last night, I auditioned for the local symphony chorus. I'm NOT a professional singer and I haven't really sung since I graduated college just due to lack of opportunity. I've studied and taught piano and I've trained with professionals, but I didn't major in music. My only two talents are language and my perfect pitch, so I was hoping that would help me impress them somehow. I sang, like, the ONLY classic piece I know, "Seit ich ihn gesehen", which is more of a Soprano II song than an Alto I song, but heck, it's in German and I can show that off a bit. No problem, right? This will be fine, right?

WRONG. I kept running out of breath because I was so nervous. I hadn't sung alone in front of anyone in four years. And then we got to sight singing which I totally know how to do... HAHAHAHAHA. This is how it looked:

And they played at a ridiculously quick tempo with a two-note introduction - I could only sing the first measure. The audtionees said, "Um, doesn't your application say you have perfect pitch? Are you sure?" It was absolutely mortifying. They cut my audition short and suggested I join a volunteer chorus because there were looking for professional singers. I left the room beet-red and listened to the next audition. Yep. PROFESSIONAL OPERA SINGER for a local opera house. Eff.

Okay, have any good stories to make me feel less idiotic?

kmbryant2413

;-; Ouch. That one made me squirm too. But hey, you did it right? I haven't sang in about a year - I auditioned and got a great role in Footloose at a very reputable theatre in San Diego. I was over the moon excited.

I had to move a month before opening night. Well, when I got back to Amarillo, they had auditions too because they're doing Footloose as well. I came to audition for them and I straight bombed it. I get really nervous when I sing in opera houses because I can hear my voice so well. I was barely audible because I hate how I sound. I rocked the dance part, but absolutely limped off stage after the singing. I haven't auditioned for anything since.

wittykitty14

Zoberg-Your story is fantastic (and yes, embarassing).  I'm a classical musician and singer myself, and I've had PLENTY of these types of experiences!  You're not alone! 

I have a pretty good one from church on Sunday.  After mass, FI and I were hanging out, discussing a bunch of stuff with the couple that we do the music with there.  By the time we left, no one else was around except the four of us, thank goodness.  We walked to the other side of the church, and you're supposed to bend one knee and do the sign of the cross as you pass by the Eucharist.  My right arm had stuff in it, and for some reason, without that arm free to do the sign, my mind went into derp mode.  This is the part where I mention that I am a martial artist, and one of things we do frequently is bow.  Feet together, hands at your sides, slow bow, with your eyes looking at what you're bowing too.  Well....for some reason, my derp brain decided to BOW at the Eucharist.  Full-on, bow.  I didn't realize until I was coming up what I had just done.  My FI (who also does martial arts with me) started cracking up.  The two people we were with gave me the best look.  My FI was stunned and said "Did you just BOW at Jesus?".  We of course had to explain to the people that we were with, who were still confused as to how I mixed those up.  I called my master instructors later and told them, and they couldn't stop laughing. I'm never going to live this down in class tonight.

Edited 'cause I forgot stuff

harper0813

Witty, that made me laugh SO HARD. I would pay to see a gif of that! College was the first time I'd ever seen anyone genuflect at the eucharist so when I first did it, I also full-on derped and did the sign of the cross with my left hand, which is commonly viewed as a mocking gesture OR a gesture of worshipping Satan. And I did it on my way to the podium to sing the psalm. In front of the congregation. Whoops.

The priest pulled me aside after mass and corrected me and had me practice in front of him.

Peaseblossom55

I'm sorry Zoberg that is awful. I do musicals in community theater a lot, but I always get so nervous at vocal auditions ( b/c I know it's my weakest link of acting, dancing and singing) So most times when I audition my breathing is all off because I'm nervous and I sound awful. I've been there before and it's so embarassing.

Chipmunk415

My FI and I went to his dad's and FSMIL's last weekend for an early Mother's day dinner. FSMIL is an animal control officer, and is currently nursing an abandoned 3 week old kitten to get her old enough and healthy enough for adoption. I got to feed Kiki, and FI took photos. FI took photo right as Kiki accidentally went for my finger rather than the syringe of kitten milk, and I involuntarily pushed the plunger in reaction to little razor teeth in my index. FI got the photo of me spraying myself in the face, and post spray, and had the nerve to send it to EVERYONE.

That's all I got. I'll try to get a photo of Kiki up here once I figure out how to get up photos of my two kitties.

MuppetFan

Wow Zoberg.  That's awful. 

Witty, I just lol'd.

Aside from my story that I wrote about where I got locked out of my running car in the pouring rain for an hour without any way to get help.....

I did go up to my car the other day and couldn't figure out why I couldn't get it open with my clicker, so I thought I needed to change the battery in it. I considered going back into the store to find a batter but wanted to drop off my stuff first, so I tried opening the door to get in with my key and it still wouldn't work. Then I realized the car was way too clean to be mine. Mine needs a bath from the winter salts and mud still.

codert

well, i fell to the ground when i was getting off the bus..:P very embarrassing!

kerbohl

I went dancing on Sunday, and I'm a relatively new dancer - my high school didn't allow dancing because "dancing leads to touching, and touching leads to sex", so I didn't get to learn there.  I went with my landlord who has been teaching me salsa because he wants someone to practice with.  But they were doing all these other dances, and this very tall fellow asked me to dance, and I thought I'd give it a shot.  He was a good dancer, and I SUCKED and felt so bad for this poor guy!  I need more work on my buchetta or whatever it's called.  I didn't dance with anyone else. 

Peledreamsofrain

Post removed due to GBCK

shaylagirl

My most embarrassing moment was my freshman year of high school.  First football game of the year, and I'm in the marching band.  I play french horn, and we used real french horns, which we hold up, not down at our side like during concert season.

Now, to be fair, my mom ordered my marching shoes one size to large (so I could "grow in to them"...in HIGH SCHOOL).  The whole horn line shifts into a backwards march; now to backwards march, we were taught "Up on the toes and slide backwards".

So, I'm backwards marching, and my balance goes to hell.  I manage to hang on to my horn with my left hand, and fall on my butt with my right hand hitting the ground.  I push myself back up and hurry to keep backwards marching to join the line.

But does my embarrassment end there? 

NOPE!

I exit the field, and my band director, who I am SURE didn't know my name at the time came up and asked "Are you okay?  I don't think I could have kept on marching after that."  Cue my face flaming BRIGHT red.

EVERYONE in my section said they saw something happen to me, but couldn't figure out what had happened.

Does my embarrassment end there?

NOPE!!

The local public access channel filmed the football games AND the half time show.

So, they're panning across the field...and panning...and...there I am, going down.  Immortalized on VHS tape FOREVER.

My dad STILL teases me about it to this very day.  And I think he has the videotape somewhere in the house.

I was nominated for an award for the band banquet that year under the "That wasn't MEANT to happen" category.  I didn't win. 

All that humiliation and I didn't even win a stupid piece of paper.  Sheesh.

smalfrie19

shaylagirl said:

My most embarrassing moment was my freshman year of high school.  First football game of the year, and I'm in the marching band.  I play french horn, and we used real french horns, which we hold up, not down at our side like during concert season.

Now, to be fair, my mom ordered my marching shoes one size to large (so I could "grow in to them"...in HIGH SCHOOL).  The whole horn line shifts into a backwards march; now to backwards march, we were taught "Up on the toes and slide backwards".

So, I'm backwards marching, and my balance goes to hell.  I manage to hang on to my horn with my left hand, and fall on my butt with my right hand hitting the ground.  I push myself back up and hurry to keep backwards marching to join the line.

But does my embarrassment end there? 

NOPE!

I exit the field, and my band director, who I am SURE didn't know my name at the time came up and asked "Are you okay?  I don't think I could have kept on marching after that."  Cue my face flaming BRIGHT red.

EVERYONE in my section said they saw something happen to me, but couldn't figure out what had happened.

Does my embarrassment end there?

NOPE!!

The local public access channel filmed the football games AND the half time show.

So, they're panning across the field...and panning...and...there I am, going down.  Immortalized on VHS tape FOREVER.

My dad STILL teases me about it to this very day.  And I think he has the videotape somewhere in the house.

I was nominated for an award for the band banquet that year under the "That wasn't MEANT to happen" category.  I didn't win. 

All that humiliation and I didn't even win a stupid piece of paper.  Sheesh.

Yep, I was in color guard and my senior year, last performance of the season, we were marching on a wet field and i slipped and fell in the middle of the sax section. Its on youtube somewhere.

rel1988

This isn't recent but Muppet's car post reminded me of this. Freshman year in college I was walking back to the dorms and it was freezing out. I came to the crosswalk and my best friend happened to drive up in her 15 year old navy Volvo station wagon. So estastic I could get a ride back with her I hop in and as I'm putting my seatbelt on I look over.....and find an 80 something woman who looks terrified with her hands up. I was so mortified I didn't even know what to say so I jumped out and ran down the street. Poor lady probably thought I was going to mug her.

MuppetFan

i just LOL'd.

harper0813

This is an embarrassing moment for my FI's coworker but it's too good not to share, especially after rel's really funny story (I hope you don't mind me laughing!),

So my fiance is in sales for a company that provides company cars to its employees that travel a lot. They all have one of three types of cars, so the parking lot looks pretty redundant - and the cars are all neutral colors - silvers, grays, golds, blacks, whites. So some people have the same car. There are about 50 people at his branch.

One of his coworkers frequently runs during his lunch break. One particular day, the men's restroom had flooded and they were using a neighboring office's restroom, but this coworker didn't want to go to the other building just to change back into his work clothes after running. So this coworker went back to what he THOUGHT was HIS car, sat in the passenger seat, got butt naked (who does this in their work parking lot?!) to put his work clothes on, and got out. At this same time, my fiance was leaving his work building and saw a guy coming out of a car that looked just like his, where he thought he had parked his car. So he went to the other identical car, sat inside, and realized that it wasn't his - it had none of his things inside and the car wouldn't start.

Both guys had left their car doors unlocked as they normally do, and my fiance's coworker got in the wrong car. He got naked in my fiance's car. Coworker pretended it never happened and avoided eye contact with my fiance for a week.

Naturally, my fiance told me this story as I was sitting in his passenger seat.

rel1988

@zoberg please laugh! Now that I'm not in the car I think it's hilarious. I bet you loved sitting in that seat after nudy-pants was in it. I have changed in parking lots tons but not butt naked lol

AllieBear725

rel1988 said:

This isn't recent but Muppet's car post reminded me of this. Freshman year in college I was walking back to the dorms and it was freezing out. I came to the crosswalk and my best friend happened to drive up in her 15 year old navy Volvo station wagon. So estastic I could get a ride back with her I hop in and as I'm putting my seatbelt on I look over.....and find an 80 something woman who looks terrified with her hands up. I was so mortified I didn't even know what to say so I jumped out and ran down the street. Poor lady probably thought I was going to mug her.

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!

MuppetFan

I love embarrassing stories. This should be a sticky thread....or maybe it wont matter since we can revive it any time now. I love it.

I think I have absolutely none this week myself. I normally do something dumb. This week, all I do is dream about ticks.

harper0813

MuppetFan said:

I love embarrassing stories. This should be a sticky thread....or maybe it wont matter since we can revive it any time now. I love it.

I think I have absolutely none this week myself. I normally do something dumb. This week, all I do is dream about ticks.

@MuppetFan - We're brain twins this week. I can't stop thinking about ticks. I experienced ticks for the very first time this past weekend and I'm totally scarred. I never want to go hiking again - and I definitely won't be bringing my dog hiking with me. We plucked TEN off of her. Ten! She must have stepped in a nest or something. FI dropped one of the ticks in my car and now I'm searching myself every time I get out. And then I forget about ticks and my crazy paranoia - and then I remember all of a sudden and I feel itchy EVERYWHERE.

They really are the worst creatures in the entire world. Nothing about them is good. They're just so innately evil.

MuppetFan

@zoberg I'm pulling 1-3 off my little one a day. She's on frontline so they die within 48 hours of contact with her but they drop off her in various state of life and onto us, sheets. I check her constantly. She's black so I have to feel her. I almost always find at least one.

My dreams were at the beginning of the season when she cuddled up to me in bed in the morning and I saw one crawling on her and I've been imagining them crawling onto my head...chest...etc.. since. I have the heebie jeebies.

rel1988

@Muppetfan @zeberg Ugh I just found the first one ever on my little guy last night trying to dig into his ear. Actually FI gets them more than anyone. This relates to an embarassing story too!

FI hunts morels in the Spring and is contantly in the woods. One day last year he's walking into the bathroom naked and I notice this "beauty mark" right on his butt cheek. Said mark is actually a tick. Being from the city I have never seen one before so I get to dig it out of him. 2 days later he comes back from the woods again and I'm teasing him asking if he got any more. He goes in to use the bathroom and lets out this bloodcurling scream. There is another tick. On the head of his penis. Embedded. Legit. He's trying to pull it out with my tweezers...it's starting to bleed..he's freaking out, asks me to help. I'm terrible with blood and getting woozy so I have to leave and tell him he's on his own. He still has a scar on his penis.

MuppetFan

bah! awful!!!  my mom woke up and had one on her boob once and my dad ripped it off and it took a chunk out with it. She was not happy.

I went to the river to get drift wood for my hermit crab as a kid. I got in the car, looked down, and started screaming because there were a million spiders on me. We stop the car. My mom looks at them as I jump out screaming.... she starts screaming "They're ticks!!". While we're in hysterics, my dad thankfully comes over to brush them off me.

harper0813

@rel1988 - Ohhhh myyyy god. That's horrifying. Ticks already feel violating enough when they're on your LEG - but in THAT region? That redefines tick violation. Asdfsjkafjasls;.

But if that happened to my fiance and I was watching him pull a tick out of his penis, I admit, I would probably be hysterically laughing.

@muppetfan - Where do you and your parents live?! Why are there so many ticks there? I need to not move there EVER.

MuppetFan

@zoberg New Hampshire.

Growing up, I lived in the suburbs but we had hunting dogs, my dad hunted, and we spent a lot of time training them in fields.

Right now, I live in the back woods in the lakes region. I've never had to deal with so many ticks in my life. This is our first spring in this house.

harper0813

MuppetFan said:

@zoberg New Hampshire.

Growing up, I lived in the suburbs but we had hunting dogs, my dad hunted, and we spent a lot of time training them in fields.

Right now, I live in the back woods in the lakes region. I've never had to deal with so many ticks in my life. This is our first spring in this house.

---

I should have known that - I saw your city plenty before the switchover! 

Holy crap, there are a lot of ticks up there in NE, aren't there? The author Amy Tan (Joy Luck Club, Bonesetter's Daughter) contracted (is that the right word?) Lyme's Disease from a tick that bit her in Baltimore, I think, and she was only there for a single day - and it's now late-stage Lyme's which has affected her ability to write. She caught it in a city up there! So terrifying.

rel1988

@Muppetfan I am totally overdramatizing this visual of a crater size chunk of boob missing

MuppetFan

It was like the size of a pin head.