Registry and Gift Forum

When to create a registry and What to put in it?

My fiance and I are getting married in about 10 1/2 months. How far out should we start our registry? I didn't want to start anything too far out because what if we ended up having to buy something that was on our list and someone already bought it for us. Also, we have pretty much the majority of things we would need (including stuff for the kitchen, bedroom, bathroom, etc) because we have been working on fixing up his house and bought a lot of it ourselves if we didn't already have it. However, we know that people are going to ask us where we are registered and/or what we are registered for, so if we don't need a lot of the "traditional" gifts what should we do? Is it inappropriate to ask people to instead contribute to activities we will do on our honeymoon? Any suggestions are appreciated.

Re: When to create a registry and What to put in it?

  • Please do not do a honeymoon registry, a cash registry, a home improvement registry, or any other kind of registry where you are basically asking guests for cash.  People already know cash makes a great gift and it's rude to ask people for it.  

    Here is what I would do in your situation:

    1. Go around the house and look for things that could use an upgrade.  Are your towels looking ratty?  Need some new sheets?  Is your cookware shabby?  Could you use more lamps in your living room?  Make note of these items and come up with a registry containing them.  It doesn't need to be big, but it's important that you have one.  Many people (myself included) absolutely will not give cash for a wedding, and if there is no registry, they will give a physical gift of their choosing.

    2. If people ask about your registry, you can tell them, "We are registered at X store, but we are also saving up for a nice honeymoon/a house/whatever."  This is about the only polite way you can ask for cash from your guests.
  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    You can start your registry any time, but if you're concerned about people buying too early (I doubt anyone would, though), then wait. I didn't do our registry until about a month or so before the wedding. 

    Please, please, please do not do a honeymoon registry. That is like asking for cash, which is always in poor taste. The company gets the money from your guests and then cuts you a check in most cases. So if I buy you a horseback riding experience, it turns out that's not what I bought you. I just gave you money,which I could have done on my own w/o going through a registry. Also, and more importantly, many of those honeymoon registry sites charge a fee, so your guests donate, say, $100 to it, but you actually only receive $75. Your guests get ripped off that way. 

    Create a small registry of upgraded items and do as Brielle suggested. When people ask, tell them where you are registered and that you are saving for X. Most people will get the hint. 


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  • erinlin25erinlin25 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Third Anniversary First Answer
    edited May 2013
    agree with Addie.  We registered 3 months out; I did not need wedding gifts that I could not use yet collecting dust in storage so it was unnecessary for me to register any earlier.

    People will notice your small registry and typically that implies gift cash gifts are preferred.  People close to you can help spread the word that you would prefer money, but its rude to have a honeymoon/dreamfund registry.  I would much rather give a cash gift knowing they get all the $$. Honeymoon registries get a profit from the money I would pay them and you do not get the full value.
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  • ohmrs2014ohmrs2014 Dirty Jerz mod
    Moderator 500 Love Its 1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    We began our registries already because everyone was asking what we wanted and where our registries were.  So we figured if we started them, people can see what we want/need and it gives us plenty of time to add items to them.
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  • Ok. Thank you all for your suggestions and input. I really appreciate it.
  • I registered 6 months before the wedding date, because that is when the experts say you are "supposed to."  Nothing has been purchased off my registry yet, and a few items have been discontinued.  Not that this is a huge inconvenience, but I don't think there is any need to drop everything and register 10 and a half months out.  I think as long as you register a month or two before your first shower, you will be fine.
  • Retread you definitely just gave me a good laugh with your chili pepper lamp story! :)

    Once again thank you for all of your suggestions! 
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