XP - "X" number of seats have been reserved in your honor

chellekel

I will be ordering my invitation suite this weekend. I am having an adults only reception. I am abiding by the etiquette rules and I am not noting that on the invitation itself. I will also be putting the full names of all guests on the envelopes. I would like to be proactive and try to prevent people from adding extra folks - so I was going to use "X" number of seats have been reserved in your honor suggestion I have seen frequently on TK.

Now to my question....Has anyone had any issues with people trying to swap the named invitees for someone else because the reply card has a certain number on it for seats? Do you just respond, "I'm sorry for the confusion, but the invite was only for ____?" But then what do you say when they mention that a certain number of seats was reserved anyway so what's the big deal?

TIA!

Kate61487

I think people have definitely had that issue.  If the person they swap is a kid you can just say "I'm sorry we won't be able to accommodate children, this is an adult only event".  If the person they swap is another adult.. well... It's rude on their part, but I honestly don't know how I would tactfully respond.

MrsMack10612

Instead of "x" number of seats, we put the actually names on our RSVP cards.

I don't know if that is something you would have an option to do or not; each then got their own set of checkboxes for meal choice or will not attend.

chellekel

Ok, thanks! 

Follow up question:  If you did a separate line for each guest, did you print the reply cards yourself?  Because if I sent them to the printer with blanks for the names so I could handwrite the names in myself and it was a situation where you only invited one person - I was then worried that they would think it ok to fill in that blank with an extra person.  (I hope that made sense)

Kate61487

I think if you do blanks and hand written names you should get a mix of cards with one line, two lines (three or four if appropriate but if there's no kids it likely isn't).  I think if there was a blank line many singles would give themselves a guest

daubachsgirl23

I did my RSVP cards the way Stage suggested.  I hand-wrote in everyone's name myself on the RSVP card next to the "M" line.  It worked perfectly, and we didn't have anyone try to bring children or make substitutions.

MrsMack10612

chellekel said:

Ok, thanks! 

Follow up question:  If you did a separate line for each guest, did you print the reply cards yourself?  Because if I sent them to the printer with blanks for the names so I could handwrite the names in myself and it was a situation where you only invited one person - I was then worried that they would think it ok to fill in that blank with an extra person.  (I hope that made sense)

We printed ours.  We did all our stationery, our RSVP cards were designed to look like airline boarding passes.  All of our singles got plus ones so that line just said Guest with a blank line to write in the name.

lisabeats

Kate61487 said:

I think if you do blanks and hand written names you should get a mix of cards with one line, two lines (three or four if appropriate but if there's no kids it likely isn't).  I think if there was a blank line many singles would give themselves a guest

I was worried about the same thing, as I've seen it happen multiple time with certain groups of friends. I didn't want to have a mix of cards, as a friend of mine designed them for free, and that would have made more work for her. She also negotiated a great deal with a printer for me, and that would have cost a lot more for set up charges, etc. since we'd be printing a smaller quantity of each card.

Ultimately, and I'm not sure if this is "okay" in etiquette books or anything, but I went with one card, where I wrote the name in. I specifically made sure to write across the whole line where there was no room for other names. Because my caterer needs to know who is eating what, I did one card per person. So Mr. John Smith got his own card, and Mrs. Catherine Smith (his wife) got her own card. If there was a SO, I included his/her name. If I was extending a +1 (open) to the guest, I wrote very small at the beginning of the line "Name of Guest:" and left room for them to write in the name of their guest. It was a little more tedious, but I'm hoping it's more or less "fool proof."

jemmini6

StageManager14 said:

Yes, that is a definite issue.  The only way to foolproof your RSVPs is to have them read

Mr. John Smith    __Accepts      ___Declines

Mrs. Mary Smith   ___Accepts    ___Declines

Otherwise, I'd just plan on making some phonecalls once the RSVPs start rolling in.  

This is what we did.  We bought an invite kit from Target and printed each RSVP card individually in order to do this.  It was a bit of a challenge for some of them (longer names, etc), but well worth the effort in the end to make sure the meaning was clearly conveyed.

chellekel

I'm ordering from Vista Print using my own design, so I think I will order the reply card blank and then individualize them myself on my printer. 

Thank you to everyone for all of your suggestions

OjitosVerdes

StageManager14 said:

Yes, that is a definite issue.  The only way to foolproof your RSVPs is to have them read

Mr. John Smith    __Accepts      ___Declines

Mrs. Mary Smith   ___Accepts    ___Declines

Otherwise, I'd just plan on making some phonecalls once the RSVPs start rolling in.  

@StageManager14 et al - I plan on our RSVP cards looking exactly like this. We're giving guests a choice of three entrees - would that info go below the accept/decline lines? (I'm guessing there isn't room to put it to the right). So underneath it would read, for example:

 Mr. John Smith ___ chicken ___ fish ___ beef

Or is that redundant, and we should try to cram it into the right of the RSVP line? 

crunchymamaof2

OjitosVerdes said:

StageManager14 said:

Yes, that is a definite issue.  The only way to foolproof your RSVPs is to have them read

Mr. John Smith    __Accepts      ___Declines

Mrs. Mary Smith   ___Accepts    ___Declines

Otherwise, I'd just plan on making some phonecalls once the RSVPs start rolling in.  

@StageManager14 et al - I plan on our RSVP cards looking exactly like this. We're giving guests a choice of three entrees - would that info go below the accept/decline lines? (I'm guessing there isn't room to put it to the right). So underneath it would read, for example:

 Mr. John Smith ___ chicken ___ fish ___ beef

Or is that redundant, and we should try to cram it into the right of the RSVP line? 

Why not just do it like this:

Mr. John Smith  ___Chicken ___Fish ___Beef   ___regretfully declines

would that work to save space?

OjitosVerdes

Why not just do it like this:

Mr. John Smith  ___Chicken ___Fish ___Beef   ___regretfully declines

would that work to save space?

Ah ha! Great idea! 

daveANDkristen

chellekel said:

I'm ordering from Vista Print using my own design, so I think I will order the reply card blank and then individualize them myself on my printer. 

Thank you to everyone for all of your suggestions

What product are you using as the reply card?  Assuming it is postcards - flat note cards are the same size and can be ordered in multiples of ten.  This might work for you if you want to print up some that have one line, some that have two, etc.

LAM524

What do you all think about the need for a more detailed plate description? I read somewhere on TK that it is best to describe everything that is on the plated choices, even down to the seasoning, vs just chicken, beef etc.

Makes perfect sense to me because some may like chicken but not with the " lemon sauce" etc. so they would pick another choice.  Im guessing this would require more printable space. A bigger RSVP card or a different "meal selection" card all together?

Kate61487

LAM2228 said:

What do you all think about the need for a more detailed plate description? I read somewhere on TK that it is best to describe everything that is on the plated choices, even down to the seasoning, vs just chicken, beef etc.

Makes perfect sense to me because some may like chicken but not with the " lemon sauce" etc. so they would pick another choice.  Im guessing this would require more printable space. A bigger RSVP card or a different "meal selection" card all together?

I personally like when there's a more detailed description b/c like you said lemon chicken vs  parmesan chicken is a different choice for me.  I think you could do:

 

M____________________

_ accepts  _ declines

Please initial next to your meal choice

______ Lemon chicken with rice pilaf and seasonal vegetables
______ Filet Mingon......
______ grilled tilapli........

 

In that instance you're not getting the individual RSVP lines like PPs were discussing.  I honestly don't know how you'd fit everything onto one card if you did a line per person and full meal descriptions.  If you felt you must do line per person rsvp cards I'd probably either list the menu on an insert (possibly on the reception insert or an 'additional info' insert) or list it on the website and hope people who are interested will look.

MrsMack10612

LAM2228 said:

What do you all think about the need for a more detailed plate description? I read somewhere on TK that it is best to describe everything that is on the plated choices, even down to the seasoning, vs just chicken, beef etc.

Makes perfect sense to me because some may like chicken but not with the " lemon sauce" etc. so they would pick another choice.  Im guessing this would require more printable space. A bigger RSVP card or a different "meal selection" card all together?

We just put beef, chicken, fish, veg and then had the full descriptions on our website.

chellekel

daveANDkristen said:

chellekel said:

I'm ordering from Vista Print using my own design, so I think I will order the reply card blank and then individualize them myself on my printer. 

Thank you to everyone for all of your suggestions

What product are you using as the reply card?  Assuming it is postcards - flat note cards are the same size and can be ordered in multiples of ten.  This might work for you if you want to print up some that have one line, some that have two, etc.

I was planning on using postcards for the RSVPs using a photo on the front.  Another good tip, thank you!