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Destination Weddings

At Home Reception Questions

Hey Ladies!

So, my wedding is in January in Mexico. Our group booking has been completed and all our VIPs are booked :) Yay for that stress to be over. We have a few people booking outside the group booking and a few that may book right before the wedding. We have an awesome guest list of 30 people with 10 "maybes." I'm really happy with the way it all worked out!

I'm at a point where I want to focus a bit on our at home reception and I want some feedback. My fiance and I are wondering when we should do it? On the west coast, February/March can be a yucky time of year. I was thinking the end of March would be a good time as it's about 7 weeks after we return from the wedding, so we'll have enough time to get everything together AFTER having a bit of a break. FI wants to do it in June. Do you think it's tacky to wait that long?

We're also having a hard time coming to an agreement about the style and feel of the reception. He wants it to be super casual, doesn't want me to wear my dress or him to wear his wedding attire. I'm pretty laid back and open to that idea, but does it send the wrong message? We're renting a hall, but catering it ourselves and having an open bar. Is it tacky to have it be super casual? We just want a chance to see and visit our family, but don't want everyone to think we're just throwing this party to get gifts (which we're not at all!).

Sorry for the rambling. Thoughts?

Re: At Home Reception Questions

  • We were originally planning on doing our AHR in August due to a bunch of big projects coming up for work right after the wedding. Now FI's sister is telling us she is getting married at the end of July so we might push ours to September. 

    Our AHR is planning to be appetizers/snacks and at least beer and wine hosted at a bar/restaurant - it will be pretty casual. I plan to wear a dress of some sort but definitely NOT my wedding dress. FI might wear a tie or just a nice button down shirt. We haven't gotten all the details down. We've tried to spread the word among friends and family that we don't want any gifts (we didn't register or anything so that usually gets the point across) and I'm hoping that with all that no one will think we are merely having a party for presents. 

    After all the stress in the last couple of weeks - I definitely don't want to plan too much and I'm kind of past caring too much what everyone is going to think. lol. I'll just plan for it to be a nice party and hope everyone agrees!!
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  • You don't have to be super laid back (ie: you can be dressed up) but I would advise that you not wear your wedding gown.  Some say it would seem like you are trying to have a second wedding, even though really it's just a chance for you to celebrate with loved ones that couldn't be at the destination. 

    Since you are renting out nice space.  I'd say dress accordingly, I don't know what to call the style.  If it were me, I'd allow guys to wear jeans if they were nice with a button down shirt (or even a polo) and nice shoes (no shorts).  I'd probably wear a white or cream colored dress, but not my wedding dress.

    As for the timing, I think it's fine for June.  We are still deciding if we are going to have a function at home to celebrate and it may even be pushed to our 1 year anniversary. 

    I say, since we technically have 1 year to send Thank you's, we should have 1 year to throw an AHR...but I usually go against what's "acceptable" and do my own thing :-p

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    [Deleted User]
  • We planned our AHR for the Saturday after our wedding. It is nice that we are finished with everything, but it was definitely hectic to get it all done!  We just had a backyard BBQ with our friends and family!  We made the food, served beer and wine, hired a DJ, and played yard games.  Ours was SUPER casual, but that is our style.  I wore a white sun dress, and he wore khaki shorts with a polo shirt.  We had a great time! 

    I wouldn't want to wear my wedding dress, or have DH wear his wedding clothes (although he wore khaki pants and white shirt).  As long as you make it more of a celebration atmosphere rather than a formal reception, I think you should be fine!  And June seems fine to me - it will be nice to have time in the middle to plan and take care of last minute things!
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