Wedding Etiquette Forum

Just wondering...

I know it's bad etiquette to invite someone for just the dancing portion of the reception. However one of my friends that I invited just let me know that she couldn't make to the wedding after all, because it's her boyfriend's birthday and they have plans for the day. But she wanted to know if it was alright for them to come after dinner and hang out and enjoy the rest of the evening with us. Is this against etiquette, even though THEY are the ones asking to come just for the dancing?
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Re: Just wondering...

  • hordolhordol member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments First Answer First Anniversary
    edited June 2013
    You invited them, right? So no, it's not rude.

    ETA: If the guest decided to only attend a portion of it, that's not rude of you at all. That was your guests decision, you didn't do anything.
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  • harper0813harper0813 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Anniversary First Answer
    edited June 2013
    You're fine - the guest asked to come only to a portion of the wedding. It's only rude when the couple asks that of a guest.
  • mlg78mlg78 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Answers
    As long as they are asking to do so and you've invited them to the whole wedding (provided their plans change).  My fiancé's cousin is doing this for our wedding as well...
  • That's what I figured, thanks ladies. 
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  • You are not being rude.  But I think she is a little off -- come on, we're adults.  I think people should make every effort to attend ceremony if they plan on coming to reception.  If she had said she could not get that day off of work, I could understand that.

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  • You are not being rude.  But I think she is a little off -- come on, we're adults.  I think people should make every effort to attend ceremony if they plan on coming to reception.  If she had said she could not get that day off of work, I could understand that.
    I am not in the least bit insulted or annoyed or mad that she's not able to come to the rest of the wedding; her personal life comes first, and in this case it's her significant others birthday. What kind of friend would I be if I told her to blow it off for my wedding? She has no obligation to "make every effort" to come to the ceremony. The fact that she still wants to come spend time with us, even if it's just for dancing is an honor. But if she said she couldn't make it all, I still wouldn't be upset because my wedding is not the priority. So I find your advice or contemplations a little misplaced... IMO.
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  • @yellowrose314 ... Did you invite her boyfriend to the wedding as well?
  • I wouldn't care.
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  • You are not being rude.  But I think she is a little off -- come on, we're adults.  I think people should make every effort to attend ceremony if they plan on coming to reception.  If she had said she could not get that day off of work, I could understand that.
    I am not in the least bit insulted or annoyed or mad that she's not able to come to the rest of the wedding; her personal life comes first, and in this case it's her significant others birthday. What kind of friend would I be if I told her to blow it off for my wedding? She has no obligation to "make every effort" to come to the ceremony. The fact that she still wants to come spend time with us, even if it's just for dancing is an honor. But if she said she couldn't make it all, I still wouldn't be upset because my wedding is not the priority. So I find your advice or contemplations a little misplaced... IMO.
    you can feel free to ignore NYU.  her advice is routinely pretty horrible.
  • cmgilpin said:





    You are not being rude.  But I think she is a little off -- come on, we're adults.  I think people should make every effort to attend ceremony if they plan on coming to reception.  If she had said she could not get that day off of work, I could understand that.

    I am not in the least bit insulted or annoyed or mad that she's not able to come to the rest of the wedding; her personal life comes first, and in this case it's her significant others birthday. What kind of friend would I be if I told her to blow it off for my wedding? She has no obligation to "make every effort" to come to the ceremony. The fact that she still wants to come spend time with us, even if it's just for dancing is an honor. But if she said she couldn't make it all, I still wouldn't be upset because my wedding is not the priority. So I find your advice or contemplations a little misplaced... IMO.

    you can feel free to ignore NYU.  her advice is routinely pretty horrible.


    Agreed.

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  • Noted haha, I shall not engage anymore
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