Invitation Wording please help me

mrgreenb

I have picked out the invitations that my FI and I love, now i have to do the great task of the wording.  His mother and father both have passed away.  My mom and dad dont want it to be weird with only their name.  Would it be ok to say


Together with their families
BRIDE
and
GROOM
request the honor of your presence
as they become husband and wife
on DATE
YEAR
at TIME
CEREMONY LOCATION
STREET ADDRESS
CITY, STATE

We are getting married on September 28th should we send out the invitations on July 25th and have the RSVP due on September 1st?  or should it be August 28th. 

Also, what would you suggest for a memory thing for this parents.  We were going to have his brother and sister come up with us at the beginning of the ceremony and light a candle for each his mom and dad.  We were going to bring the candles then to the reception hall so they can "be there" for us. 

Thanks for the help
Mindi

OliveOilsMom

First, if you parents are hosting the reception, it is perfectly acceptable to have just your parents' names listed on the invitation.  Traditionally, the groom's parents names have only ever been listed on invitations for Jewish Wedding Ceremonies. 

Your RSVP date should be dictated by when your venue needs the final head count. So if a week before you ceremony, the venue needs the final count, put 2 weeks before the wedding on your RSVPs because that will give you time to track down anyone who didn't respond by the deadline.  And invitations should go out 6-8 weeks before the wedding.

Also, how long ago did FI's parents pass?  If it's been recent, your tribute to his parents may unintentionally cause sad feelings in your guests, FI's siblings, and FI.  A wedding is an emotional day, but it should be emotional for happy reasons.  Not sad feelings because FI's parents are not there.  FIL had passed 7 years prior to our wedding and we had no outward remembrances for him.  We mentioned him during the Prayers of the Faithful in our mass and also in the program.  We also did have a bouquet of flowers that signified our grandparents and FIL, but there was no sign or anything to show our guests why those flowers were there, but we knew.  You don't want your wedding to become a memorial.

Jen4948

The correct wording is

Together with their families
BRIDE
and
GROOM
request the honour of your presence
as they are united in marriage
on DATE
YEAR
at TIME
CEREMONY LOCATION
STREET ADDRESS
CITY, STATE

If you are not marrying in a house of worship, the fifth line should read "request the pleasure of your company."

The proper place for a tribute is in a wedding program, not on an invitation.  The persons "honored" by wedding invitations are the guests, not the couple or their parents, alive or deceased.

The purpose of a wedding invitation is to invite the guests to an event and provide logistical information about it.  Deceased persons cannot host, so their names do not belong on invitations.