Wedding Etiquette Forum

Tipping Facility Coordinator when gratuity is included

Our rehearsal dinner venue includes a 20% gratuity charge on all food and drinks. 

The set up is a private room in a restaurant that has its own private floor, bathrooms, elevator, and bar. So they're setting up tables, including linens, etc for us. I'm working with the special events coordinator who's an employee of the restaurant.

The reason I'm asking is because the 20% is applied to food and drinks. There's no additional set up fee (only a $150 room rental) or equipment rental). I feel like we're getting extra services by having them set up this room and having the event coordinator do her coordinating thing with making it happen. 

My question is: 1) should I tip the event coordinator individually? and 2) if so, how much? a percent, or a flat rate (our bill will probably be around $3,500)?
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Re: Tipping Facility Coordinator when gratuity is included

  • itzMSitzMS member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary
    I wouldn't. I'd assume all staff shares in the 20%.
  • @southernbelle0915 - as the gratuity is already included, you do not have to tip anyone involved in the reception.  I assume your contract included the reception, the food, the drink, the waitstaff, etc.  

    However, should you be extremely pleased with the job they do at your ceremony, you can give them a gratuity at the end of the night or send a thank you note with something extra in it later.  
  • LakeR2014 said:
    @southernbelle0915 - as the gratuity is already included, you do not have to tip anyone involved in the reception.  I assume your contract included the reception, the food, the drink, the waitstaff, etc.  

    However, should you be extremely pleased with the job they do at your ceremony, you can give them a gratuity at the end of the night or send a thank you note with something extra in it later.  
    It's just the rehearsal dinner - not the wedding. My thinking here was that I usually tip 20% when I go out to eat but they're doing a lot more. I'm sure it's baked into the higher costs of the meal, etc. but just wanted to get everyone's thoughts and experiences if you ran into the same thing.
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  • itzMSitzMS member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary
    LakeR2014 said:
    @southernbelle0915 - as the gratuity is already included, you do not have to tip anyone involved in the reception.  I assume your contract included the reception, the food, the drink, the waitstaff, etc.  

    However, should you be extremely pleased with the job they do at your ceremony, you can give them a gratuity at the end of the night or send a thank you note with something extra in it later.  
    It's just the rehearsal dinner - not the wedding. My thinking here was that I usually tip 20% when I go out to eat but they're doing a lot more. I'm sure it's baked into the higher costs of the meal, etc. but just wanted to get everyone's thoughts and experiences if you ran into the same thing.


    For our rehearsal dinner, DH slipped the manager an extra $100 in cash at the end of the night. We are "regulars" there, and he wanted to show extra appreciation. Though keep in mind our RD was a fifth of the cost of yours...so if you want to tack on an extra $500 go for it. I don't think anyone would turn you down on cash...

    We did not tip extra on top of the 20% at our wedding reception.

    LakeR2014
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    If there's already a gratuity included in the bill, I would not tip more unless I wanted to indicate appreciation for extra special work that the staff did.  And if I do that, I'd write them a thank-you and offer a testimonial.
    southernbelle0915itzMSs-aries8990
  • No need to tip, as the coordinator is more than likely included in the service fee gratuity. Maybe having a bakery bring them some cookies or cupcakes, writing a thank you card and/or writing positive reviews online would be nice!

  • lyndausvilyndausvi Western Slope, Colorado mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    Coordinators are often NOT part of a tipping pull.  Especially if they hold a manager type position.   We tipped our coordinator because he did go above and beyond in our opinion.

    I say if you think they deserve a tip, then tip them.  How much is up to you, but I would say $50-100 would be good.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • TK says you should tip on-site coordinators, but it's a pretty steep amount, I think. $200 or something. We're probably going to tip ours even though every time I ask "Can we do X" she says "No." Hopefully she'll be more helpful day of. $100 maybe.
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  • Since you say 20% is your standard tip already, I would be prepared to give an extra 5-10% of the total (pre-gratuity) for excellent service.
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  • runpipparunrunpipparun member
    Eighth Anniversary 500 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited June 2013
    I'm so befuddled that I just emailed the owner of our venue. Ha.

    ETA: Official word - Our facility coordinator ("Event Director") is included in the gratuity.
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