Wedding Etiquette Forum

Wording on RSVP cards?

Hello, hopefully someone out there has good advice on my RSVP card question.
First, a little background info - I have a collection of family members (not all, of course) who chronically show up at events with uninvited friends (and they don't inform the hosts before arriving).  I'm not sure if this is done to intentionally be rude, or if they just think "Oh, invite to grandpa's birthday?  Of course I'll bring x-number of my nearest and dearest!"
Anyway, I would like to avoid this happening at my wedding so that we're not running around looking for extra seats and meals (and paying for it!)  I've seen people add things to their RSVP cards that say: "X-number of seats have been reserved in your honor."  I thought this would be a good idea to let people know that there is a limit to the number of guests they can bring.  Is this ok?
My follow-up question would be this:
Say I invite a couple and write "2 seats have been reserved in your honor" but only 1 of them can make it.  How do they indicate which person is coming? What would be the proper wording?

Thank you!

Re: Wording on RSVP cards?

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    "2 seats have been reserved" is totally ok.

    To find out who might be coming we had people initial/write their name next to their meal choices.
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    We look forward to celebrating with you!
    ____ # attending
    ____ decline with regret

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    I was worried about the same thing, so I tried to find a way to include as much as possible.  I've attached my RSVP card for you to check out.  HOPEFULLY this will make it simpler for us and not too confusing for the guests.....
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    This is one that we just got in the mail (with no stamp on the envelope---grrrrr!) Wording like this should suffice, if you are really concerned about some particularly *etiquette ignorant* guests, add a little blurb at the top about how many seats are reserved in their honor or whatever, we have gotten invites like that.  It actully annoyed me the first time I saw that because the invite was addressed to then FI and I, then I open and it says "Two seats are reserved in your honor" and I was thinking, "Thanks for spelling that one out for me, I know we are the only ones invited because of the envelope (we have a 6 year old).  It wasn't until our wedding that I realized people are....people need an etiquette book.

    Kindly Reply by blah blah blah


    _____accepts with pleasure

    _____declines with regrets

    Please mark # of meal choices

    ____chicken _______beef


    June 1, 2013 - finally making it official!

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    OpenHeart0117OpenHeart0117 member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited June 2013

    Thanks for sharing this example on the board.

    My biggest issue is I don't want to have to call & have those "awkward conversations" with people that everyone talks about on these boards. I know that can't always be avoided, but the clearer you make the RSVP card, it seems more likely it can be avoided because people just simply misunderstood or made erroneous assumptions.

    I know that there are many people who:

    a) don't pay attention to whose name was or was not on the envelope & don't know the distinction

    b) want to exercise their right to bring whomever they please (IF they think its an option)

    c) just get totally confused by the way a "standard" RSVP is written

    Your card is one of the most clear cut ways of expressing/addressing this issue that I have seen. You have  to make it abundantly clear (to some people) how many seats are reserved for their party.
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