Wedding Etiquette Forum

Thank you note delivery?

We received a wedding gift in the mail yesterday from a couple that is very close to both my and FI's parents. It included an incredibly generous check and a beautiful needlepoint that the wife made for us. We telephoned them last night to thank them for both gifts- I wanted them to know that we received it in the mail since it was shipped from far away.

I wrote a thank you card this morning and was set to mail it out, but I just realized that they are flying out tonight from their home in California to NJ for some visiting before our wedding next weekend. They will not receive the thank you card until they return back to CA in 3 weeks. 

Would it be better to hand deliver the thank you card to them? We will see them a few times over the next week prior to the wedding, as well as at the wedding. I just don't feel comfortable cashing the check without them receiving the thank you card until a few weeks later, especially if we will see them before that.

Thanks so much for any advice!

Re: Thank you note delivery?

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    No matter what, you should cash the check so that they can balance their finances.  They already know you have it anyway.  (Just don't spend it until after the wedding!)

    I don't think that it's wrong to mail their thank you card.  They won't get it for a while, but they'll see the postmark date, and know that you sent it right away.  You could also date your note to them on the inside of the card, if you're really worried about it.

    As far as I know, there's nothing wrong with hand-delivering it either.  This could be where the etiquette-minded Knotties can say if this is true or not.  I personally prefer to mail thank you cards, but I don't know what etiquette dictates here.

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    Mail the card and cash the check. You're overthinking this.
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    itzMSitzMS member
    First Answer First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment

    OP, it's awesome that you're writing your TY notes as you receive gifts!! However, the vast majority of people do not even expect to get a TY note until after the wedding.

    You'll be fine. Hand delivering TY notes is kind of awkward, anyways.

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    Cash the check, mail the card.  I wouldn't hand deliver a thank you note (I received this advice from the etiquette board already).  I would write it and send it before the wedding though.


    June 1, 2013 - finally making it official!

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    There's nothing wrong with hand delivering something that might otherwise go out in the mail. You can hand them the note, then verbally tell them how generous was their gift and how much you like it.
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