July 2013 Weddings

last minute ban?

So there is this one potential guest... he is a friend of my future husband... and I have been a little worried about him from the start. He sometimes behaves erratically and says inappropriate things at the most random times. Just recently we discovered that his behavior stems from drug addiction and apparently his family just had an intervention with him but he didn't want to go to rehab. I had no idea it was this bad, because I don't see him very often. I am terrified of the possibilities of what could happen if he were to be at the wedding. I do not want any of that behavior around my family, my daughter, or anyone for that matter! Is it ok for my fiance to tell him he cannot come? (to be specific, he is addicted to synthetic weed and cannot stop smoking it. He would probably be sneaking out during the reception to smoke constantly and then act very weird because that is his current behavior). I don't want to be mean, but if he were to say or do something to offend my family, I would be PISSED! Advice please!
~Happy Wife.... Happy Life~

Re: last minute ban?

  • drg424drg424 member
    5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper

    While maybe not the most popular opinion, this is my opinion:

    It's your wedding. If someone makes you uncomfortable or is giving you a hard time or is at-risk for legitimately damaging the day you've probably spent more money, time, thought, care, and everything else in planning than any other day of your life - that's your absolute right to do so.

    There are people who I did not invite from my pool of "friend" invites because I knew they would be belligerently wasted, spend the whole night smoking ciggs or pot in the parking lot, or whatever - things that I would not want around mixed company - specifically our parents/grandparents who have generously paid for and helped plan this celebration for us.

    And I don't know about you, but I'm pretty stressed and busy with ten days left. "Ain't nobody got time for that."

    Hope that helps!

  • MrsH86MrsH86 member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    Yes! Thank you so much for your advice! I specifically only invited friends that I knew would be able to handle themselves. My friends like to have a good time, but I do have a handful of friends that are notorious for drinking too much and acting crazy... so those friends did not get invited to what I consider a 'mostly family' wedding & reception. My FH's handful of friends are mostly good guys. The one I was worried about, I had previously mentioned to FH that I was concerned and he assured me he would act right. But even now, he agrees that his friend should not come to due to the circumstances. I did not want to come off as a bridezilla, so I will let him talk to his friend about it. I just cringe at the thought of him saying something offensive or being intoxicated in front of children. Thank you for your advice!!
    ~Happy Wife.... Happy Life~
  • I agree. Your wedding your rules. He wouldn't go to rehab so he isn't even willing to admit he has a problem. Sad but I wouldn't have him come
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