Rehearsal Dinner

BunnyChii

So FMIL (who is hosting the rehearsal dinner) wants to send out invites for it. Traditionally, who do I invite? My parents say just the people in the wedding, but FMIL thinks we should invite the grandparents as well. I don't really see why they would want to come to the rehearsal when they won't actually be doing anything there, though.

What does TK say?

RailWayWife

I am pretty sure it is Wedding Party & their spouses as well as out of town guests that are supposed to be invited to the Rehearsal Dinner. 

We have 1 family that is from out of town but we are not inviting them to the RD. They would know no one there but I know they would feel obligated to come. I know that may be breaking some etiquette law somewhere but for this situation I 100% believe its best. 

 

PandPMeant2B

We are inviting the BP, parents, brothers and sisters not in the BP, and out of own guests.  We live in MA and the wedding is in NJ, so a lot of our guests are from out of town.  Luckily, the wedding is at 7:30PM on a Saturday so most guests won't be getting into town until Saturday anyway.  I feel like it's the right thing to do to invite out of town guests, especially if they're family, even if they're not part of the wedding.  If you're not doing an actual rehearsal, it's more about who you want there and not who's supposed to be there.

Xstatic3333

I think if your FMIL is hosting and wants to include grandparents that's totally reasonable, but officially just people in the wedding and their SOs have to be invited. That's all we are doing, though we probably would have included grandparents if they were still with us. Out of towners are totally optional; we aren't including them but, like RailWay, we don't have many anyway.

drummerbonbon

We're doing BP, family, and out of town family. We aren't doing other out of town guests simply because it would double the number of people at the dinner, and we had a hard enough time finding a nice, casual venue for the 40-45 people in the families and BP. 

mrsrutkowski

We're doing BP and spouses, readers, and parents. It'll be about 30 people

audubonbride2013

If your FMIL is hosting then it should really be up to her.  If she wants grandparents then let her and same if she wants OOT guests.  My FILs are hosting and they are super indecisive.  One minute its only BP, readers, immediate family, and grandparents then its all OOT guests and I think now we're doing OOT family and BP only.  We have a lot of OOT guests (my FI's entire family) so we had to limit to just OOT family or else it would turn into a second reception with only his family & friends.

Jessica41381

Our rehearsal dinner is about 30 people, between the wedding party and our parents.. Since we are paying for it we just kept it simple. The actual rehearsal dinner costs more per person than our actual reception.

TiffanyT816

I've read that immediate family of the Bride and Groom as well as WP and their spouses are included, also any guests that are in from out of town, particularly if they are staying with parents, etc.

For ours, we have a limit of 20 people, so we're doing our parents, our WP and their spouses/kids and our grandparents. Our brother/sister who aren't in the wedding will not be invited. While I feel bad, we just can't swing paying for them.

xxstardust

We are having the parents, the BP/significant others, readers/gifts presenters, and one set of aunts/uncles apiece (because all of their children are involved in the wedding).

amalama

We are including grandparents, but I don't think you have to. Since she is paying I would let her though. You definitely don't have to include out of towners (but I think it is nice). For us that's about 75% of the guest list, and a lot are 1-2 hours away so what defines out of town. It was just easier for us not to.

Basically I think the only requirements are the people that have to be at the rehearsal and their dates (or parents if you're having any children in the wedding).

msrere1985

we are just doing BP and their spouses/parents (for the kids in the BP) our parents and immediate family but if she is paying I wouldn't mind who she wants to invite.

sparkellyy

We are inviting BP & a guest, out of town guests, and grandparents

ashleyp0420

ok opinions ladies!

We are having a destination wedding so everyone is an out of town guest!

We have 25 guests and cannot afford to have such a large rehearsal dinner (my in-laws are not paying for anything nor have they offered to.)  And my parents have already paid about 75% of our costs so I will not ask them for another dime.

Attending the rehearsal will be my MOH, BM, both sets of parents and my FSIL and her fiancé.  Is it ok to leave the rest of our family and friends out of the dinner??

kstan08

Yes! If its a destination wedding I'm sure they won't mind doing a little sightseeing or hitting up a local restaurant!

ashleyp0420

omg I've been waiting for an opinion for like 2 weeks now, thank you!!!!

 

kstan08

No problem @ashleyp0420! Good luck!,