Pre-wedding Parties

Non Bridesmaid Luncheon

This is my second wedding and I'm not really having any bridesmaids but I am asking my soon to be stepdaughter to stand with me.  However, I have some very good friends that I've known for 20+ years that are always supportive and "mother" me when I need it.  I don't want any bridal showers although they are insisting on doing at least a lingerie party for me.  I actually want to do something nice for them instead.  Would it be inappropriate for me to host a "NON" bridesmaid luncheon?  A dear friend of mine is opening a tea room soon and I thought I might take my close friends to a luncheon there as a thank you for all they do for me.  I know they will doing all the tasks that bridesmaids and MOH's normally do when the time comes for my wedding.  None of them were bridesmaids at my first wedding either.  BTW my mother is passed and I don't really have any other female relatives close if that makes a difference.

Re: Non Bridesmaid Luncheon

  • itzMSitzMS member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary

    This is my second wedding and I'm not really having any bridesmaids but I am asking my soon to be stepdaughter to stand with me.  However, I have some very good friends that I've known for 20+ years that are always supportive and "mother" me when I need it.  I don't want any bridal showers although they are insisting on doing at least a lingerie party for me.  I actually want to do something nice for them instead.  Would it be inappropriate for me to host a "NON" bridesmaid luncheon?  A dear friend of mine is opening a tea room soon and I thought I might take my close friends to a luncheon there as a thank you for all they do for me.  I know they will doing all the tasks that bridesmaids and MOH's normally do when the time comes for my wedding.  None of them were bridesmaids at my first wedding either.  BTW my mother is passed and I don't really have any other female relatives close if that makes a difference.

    Certainly invite your friends out to tea, but don't make it about your wedding or being a "non-bridesmaid" at all.

    Just have a good time with your closest friends. Please don't assign them any "tasks".

  • Oh I certainly wouldn't word it as a NON bridesmaid luncheon. I would just call it a luncheon but do it more formal like a bridesmaid luncheon.  This would be more as a thank you in advance for helping me out and being supportive through my engagement.  Because we aren't really having attendants and they all know that, they have already volunteered to do the typical things that bridesmaids would do - like help with decorating and set up and clean up.  Some of them know each other but not all and I thought it might be a good way to introduce them all before the wedding.
  • itzMSitzMS member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary
    Oh I certainly wouldn't word it as a NON bridesmaid luncheon. I would just call it a luncheon but do it more formal like a bridesmaid luncheon.  This would be more as a thank you in advance for helping me out and being supportive through my engagement.  Because we aren't really having attendants and they all know that, they have already volunteered to do the typical things that bridesmaids would do - like help with decorating and set up and clean up.  Some of them know each other but not all and I thought it might be a good way to introduce them all before the wedding.

    Please don't do this for the purpose of "introducing" people with the hope they'll be able to partner up on wedding tasks. Also avoid talk of wedding tasks...you definitely don't want anyone to feel obligated to help or get guilted into "joining" the decorations committee. :-)

    Do it for the sole purpose of wanting to get your friends together for a good time.

  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    I have non bridesmaid luncheons all the time. I call it "meeting friends for lunch." 


    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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    Dreamergirl8812
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