Gift for my son during ceremony?? NEED HELP!

stina&brad

We would like my fiance to present my two kids (his future step kids) with a gift during the ceremony.  My little girl is easy- something like a very nice necklace would have special meaning and be something she can hang on to for life.  But my 8 year old son????  I have no ideas!!  He isnt going to like any piece of jewelry.  He doesnt hang on to sports so much so that a nice engraved bat or something would mean much to him.  We dont know what to do!  We cant do just a gift for my daughter, so this may mean no gifts.  but we really had our heart set on doing this when we say vows to my children during the ceremony.  any ideas would be much much appreciated!

NYCBruin

My brother and I both received watches for our first communion (we were about 8) and we both still have those and still sometimes wear them (we both have nicer watches now that we usually wear).

Depending on how responsible your son is for an 8 year old, a swiss army knife may also work.  Someone gave my brother one when he was about that age and he thought it was the coolest thing ever.  This is definitely a know your kid situation though, since I know plenty of 8 year olds that should not be trusted with sharp objects.

Simply Fated

You know your son better than we do, what's he into? I'd stick with that.

I'm not sure why giving gifts need to happen during the ceremony, though. Will they always receive gifts on your anniversary? I'm just curious as to the reasoning behind this decision.

QueerFemme

I really think this is a bad idea.  the ceremony and vows are about two adults making promises to each other. If you are set on doing this, maybe make it right before or right after the ceremony in a private moment.   If your FI has something special in his family, a watch or some heirloom he wants to pass down, that may be appropriate for your son.

AddieCake

Another vote for no vows/gifts during the ceremony. Your children are not getting married to you or your fiance. If you want to "blend the family' or something, just privately and quietly have a "we're so happy our little family is growing/we all love each other so much" moment and exchange gifts then. 

I think a watch sounds like a nice gift. 

Jen4948

Give the gifts at some other occasion.

There's no reason why you can't give gifts to your future stepchildren...but please, don't make it part of your wedding ceremony just so they will feel "included."  If you want to include them, do it the same way you would include any other family member: by having them as bridesmaids/groomsmen, ushers, or readers.  They should not exchange vows with you, because they are not entering into a relationship with you by choice.  Only their father is.  So only he and you should exchange vows.

manateehugger

AddieL73 said:

Another vote for no vows/gifts during the ceremony. Your children are not getting married to you or your fiance. If you want to "blend the family' or something, just privately and quietly have a "we're so happy our little family is growing/we all love each other so much" moment and exchange gifts then. 

I think a watch sounds like a nice gift. 

I agree 100% with this. No vows. 

What if you did a moment before or after the ceremony where your daughter and son opened their "wedding presents" with the photographer there to get some good shots?

MairePoppy

I agree that vows should be exchanged between you and your fi, only. 

If your fi would like, he could set aside some private time with the children to present their gifts. Or, they could be given to them at your RD. I second NYCBruin 's suggestion of a Swiss Army Knife. Your fi could even get it engraved. Every little boy in my family has received a SAK at one time or another.