Moms and Maids
FMIL and FSIL difficulties
We're getting married the second weekend of September. My mother in law announced yesterday that she will be arriving late afternoon the day before the wedding... which is interesting, because when she asked how she could contribute, we said that rather than contributing financially, we would appreciate help in the days leading up to the wedding. We're DIYing most of it, and we've been really good about getting things done early, but I'll be back in (law) school by then and I anticipate that there will be a rush to finish last-minute things a few days before.
Anyway, she's arriving just late enough to not help with anything that day... And she's bringing with her our officiant (her brother). It's 2 1/2 hours from the airport to our venue, so this means there won't be a rehearsal the night before. News to me. Last night she emailed me a very fake-sounding email, all cheery, and then giving me their itinerary, like she was looking for my blessing. Huh? What am I even supposed to do about that? Sounds like plane tickets have been purchased, so I'm not sure if saying anything at this point will result in change. I've been calling a few close friends and I think that I will be able to find enough people to help the day before, but I feel like she's planning to float in fewer than 24 hours before the ceremony begins and make a big deal out of her arrival. (It wouldn't be the first.)
Then, there's this other issue, with FH's sister. We're having a very small wedding-- 70 absolute tops, per venue restrictions (and budget limitations). She wants to invite this guy who she knows who lives several hundred miles away, who she has a crush on and might want to date in the future, but isn't sure it will work out, with whom she's spent very little time, oh, and she thinks this will be a great opportunity to introduce him to the family. What the what? I gave her a very diplomatic answer when she asked (don't know the # of RSVPs yet, if we have room we'll let you know, but he is welcome to brunch the day after), but she's spoken with her mother (above) who spoke with FH, who won't quite admit that his sudden interest in inviting sister's crush is because of his conversation with his mother. (Going behind my back to get others to do her bidding is FMIL's modus operandi, ask me about the time she tried to stop me from going to law school without saying a word to me.)
ANYWAY! Any advice for either of these situations? I am at a loss for how to respond to FMIL's email. I would also prefer that FSIL not use our wedding to introduce her new potential suitor to the family. I'm trying not to be too controlling about this, but that just seems weird to me. Thoughts? Similar situations and how they worked out?
This discussion has been closed.