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Just Engaged and Proposals

Just engaged, but can't start planning yet...

I'm newly engaged, and so am in the very beginning phases of planning what will ultimately probably be a smallish, intimate, offbeat kind of wedding...not a huge gala event, more down-home,simple, DIY, the sort of thing that's mostly tailored to us and informal but with a few traditional elements that are important to us.  

My dilemma is that I can't do any of the things that are the first things you're supposed to do to get the ball rolling. I know that where/when/what the budget is needs to be nailed down in order to move on.   I can't choose a location or date, because those are both dependent upon the outcome of the military billet my fiance, a Navy Chief, recently put in for.  If gets the billet, it will be a 1-3 year assignment, so we'll move. Our wedding will be one city (our current one), or another (the location of the billet), and they are 600-ish miles apart. Until I know if we will be moving, I won't know what our timeline is, what our location will be, OR what our budget will be (if we move, I'll be leaving my current job, and our household income will change a bit). 

My question is, what CAN I do to start getting some things prepared without these key pieces of information? Anything?  Or just sit back and enjoy being engaged?  We are both slightly older than average for a first marriage (I'm 36, he's 40), and we are both excited to get this moving as soon as possible, but are caught up in the typical military hurry up and wait routine.  Any advice on little things I can do while I wait on the biggie information?  

Re: Just engaged, but can't start planning yet...

  • KatWAGKatWAG Chicago member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    I would just sit back and enjoy being engaged. When does he find out if you will be moving?

    I would start getting a rough budget and rough guest lists together. I would start looking at venues in both locations so you are aware of what is out there. Maybe start looking at wedding dresses? But i wouldnt buy one until you have a concrete date.

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Put together two budgets - one if he gets the billet, one if he doesn't. 

    Put together a guest list.

    Start looking at venues in your area and the one where you might live.

    Look into marriage license requirements for both locations (if they're different states). 

    Think about a time of year, colors and ideas. Start flagging favorite ideas on TK - it'll save the ones you like.

    Congrats, btw! 
    *********************************************************************************

    image
  • First of all: Congratulations! :)

    There are some things you can start working on, like the PP said before me:

    a) Guest List: might not be the definite one but surely you have an idea of the MUST HAVE people. It will help you shape up the size of your wedding.

    b) Look into wedding invitations: this might change from place to place, but again it will help you get an idea of how much this might cost, what amount of money gets you what, and so forth.

    c) Marriage License: Important! This changes from place to place!

    d) Theme: Maybe you will have an idea if this will be a spring/winter/autumn/summer wedding and that can help you think about what you should be looking for in the sense of flower arrangements (flowers in season are cheaper!)

    e) DIY: You said you wanted to have som DIY elements, you can look into that, see what you are planning on doing, how much it would cost, and maybe even start working on some of them (depending on what it is)

    I understand how it feels like if you don't start with the big things first, but little things are time consuming too and you can start looking into them already. Also, the Internet helps tons! If you have an idea where you might move to, you can look into some of the things over there online, and start putting together a budget as well.

    Good luck!


  • edited August 2013
    for now i would just sit back and enjoy the engagement :)

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