I have a big dilemma. Although I am not OK with the friendship between him an another woman for multiple reasons, he still considers this particular woman to be one of his best friends. He is practically begging me to allow her to be invited to his bachelor party. He knows how strongly I feel about them being friends and it hurts my feelings that he would even ask. There are about 15 boys going, and she wants to be included. I have never heard of a woman going to a bachelor party/ nor wanting to go to one. Can you please just answer yes or no if you would be ok with this woman going to my fiances bachelor party?
Re: Would you be ok if your fiance wanted a girl (friend) at his bachelor party?
I had my best guy friend at my bachelorette party and I'm pretty sure DH had some women stop out at his (he's a firefighter, so he has tons of friends...male and female). It's fine.
It seems like you have trust issues.
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You might ask your FI how he would feel about your hypothetical or actual best male friend attending a bachelorette for you.
I guess it all boils down to where the trust issue comes from. I suggest you work out it before you walk down the aisle.
I echo what others have said about why you're uncomfortable. If it's because she's a bad influence in some way, then fine. If it's only because she's a woman, then you should let him have his party how he wants and consider why it bothers you.
Is it just this particular woman you object to, or do you not want him to be friends with any women?
If it's just this woman... then why?
It would depend on their relationship. Is it that you don't like him having any femail friends or is it this specific person? If i'ts this specific person, it would depend on the reasons you don't care for her. If it's women in general, then I think you need to ask yourself, why don't you trust him around other women? Does he get flirty and out of control when he drinks? Has he cheated on you in the past? Or have you had someone else cheat on you in the past and you're carrying trust issues into this relationship?
1. I would be ok with females attending my FI's bachelor party. Why? Because I trust him.
2. I had two of my best male friends attend my bachelorette party. My FI never raised an eyebrow.
3. I threw one of my best friend's bachelor party. I was one of three females in attendance and I had a blast. His wife had no concerns.
I think the bigger issue is a trust issue between you and your FI. Why do you not want you FI to be friends with this woman. I would have a reall issue if my FI tried to control my friends and who I could hang out with. Does your FI do this to you? How would you feel?
There must be more to your story.
totally fine with it.
So I'm assuming you can only be friends with females?
Wow, what a poor attitude...
So you're admitting that you'd spread 'em for any guy who came along because there's just no other option when men and women are together?
My hometown "bachelorette" party was me and two other guys. Plenty of fun was had, plenty of booze was consumed, no clothing was removed, and I'm still happily married to my husband.
And no, I wouldn't. But I don't have guy friends and don't allow males to think I am more than just an acquaintance. If I have a question for a male, I either direction the question to his gf or so or ask my fiance to ask the question. I do not open myself up for any male to think I am flirting in any sort of way out of respect to my future husband. I would expect him to do the same.
I know a lot of other women who agree with me, and I don't expect to change anyone's minds, and you certainly won't change mine.