Not Engaged Yet

Non traditional- Non diamond engagement rings?

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Re: Non traditional- Non diamond engagement rings?

  • I honestly don't get why you guys are getting so heated about her "promise ring". It's a piece of jewelry that has meaning between her and her bf, not them and you. So why do you care so much? Geez. 

    Anyway, back to the main topic as well - I was previously engaged at a young age and fell into the diamond thing. This isn't a knock to anyone who loves diamonds, but now I've seen the truth of the diamond industry, and really wanted to try and get something eco-friendly or not a diamond. As luck would have it, my FI's parents had a beautiful sapphire surrounded by small diamonds from his great aunt, so I got it fixed up and now it is my e-ring, and I love it. Even if it was a diamond, it was still a reused one and not a new one, so I would have been happy with that.

    However, when I received the sapphire it had a slight chip in it so we had to get it polished, as is the downside of getting something softer than a diamond, that it'll require a bit more care. I've just had it for a month so I doubt I'll need to polish it again for a long time though...
  • SwazzleSwazzle New Jersey
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    I honestly don't get why you guys are getting so heated about her "promise ring". It's a piece of jewelry that has meaning between her and her bf, not them and you. So why do you care so much? Geez. 


    Anyway, back to the main topic as well - I was previously engaged at a young age and fell into the diamond thing. This isn't a knock to anyone who loves diamonds, but now I've seen the truth of the diamond industry, and really wanted to try and get something eco-friendly or not a diamond. As luck would have it, my FI's parents had a beautiful sapphire surrounded by small diamonds from his great aunt, so I got it fixed up and now it is my e-ring, and I love it. Even if it was a diamond, it was still a reused one and not a new one, so I would have been happy with that.

    However, when I received the sapphire it had a slight chip in it so we had to get it polished, as is the downside of getting something softer than a diamond, that it'll require a bit more care. I've just had it for a month so I doubt I'll need to polish it again for a long time though...
    Heated? No.

    We are allowed to share our opinions even if they differ from yours and whomever else's.



    buddysmom80[Deleted User]KeptInStitches
  • Swazzle said:
    I honestly don't get why you guys are getting so heated about her "promise ring". It's a piece of jewelry that has meaning between her and her bf, not them and you. So why do you care so much? Geez. 

    Anyway, back to the main topic as well - I was previously engaged at a young age and fell into the diamond thing. This isn't a knock to anyone who loves diamonds, but now I've seen the truth of the diamond industry, and really wanted to try and get something eco-friendly or not a diamond. As luck would have it, my FI's parents had a beautiful sapphire surrounded by small diamonds from his great aunt, so I got it fixed up and now it is my e-ring, and I love it. Even if it was a diamond, it was still a reused one and not a new one, so I would have been happy with that.

    However, when I received the sapphire it had a slight chip in it so we had to get it polished, as is the downside of getting something softer than a diamond, that it'll require a bit more care. I've just had it for a month so I doubt I'll need to polish it again for a long time though...
    Heated? No. We are allowed to share our opinions even if they differ from yours and whomever else's.
    Yes, everyone IS entitled to their own opinion, but when someone says "Just admit it, it's a pacifier for the real deal." it's going overboard, trying to force your opinion onto someone else. Sorry, but that to me is rude and drawing the line. She's not hurting anyone by having a something that's symbolic between her and her bf. To force someone to think your way is just ridiculous.
    queenofhearts1728
  • Okay. Are we entitled to our opinion? Yes. If someone posts something, it will be responded to. Its out there for everyone to either agree or disagree with. While responses may come off as disrespectful/heated to one person, it may not come off that way to the PP (and the pp can defend her viewpoint or drop the subject, but she is opening herself up to comments if she responds). As for non-traditional rings. Yes. I love those. I grew up under the impression that diamonds are a girl's best friend. I jumped that bandwagon after seeing blood diamond (who hasn't heard that response before...), and after paying closer attention to my family's behavior when someone would receive a diamond e-ring. They would focus more on the size, the cut, the clarity, and what metal it was made out of rather than the symbolism that it represents. I believe everyone has different preferences and I respect that, if I see a diamond ring given as an e-ring, its no different than an e-ring with any other stone. E-rings are e-rings, doesn't matter the price, what stone, which designer, what model. Hell my dad proposed to my mother with a post it note, and exchanged it for an emerald ring later on (guess you can call that post it note a promise ring to an e-ring, and she was 40).  As for the promise ring, there are plenty of meanings behind the symbolism and can be interpreted in many ways. Whoever receives the ring will determine its meaning with their partner, and its up to the partner to explain their intentions upon giving it to the recipient. I can see how some people could find it strange if the couple was older and dating for a while and the person's SO said, "here is this ring, because I want to marry you someday,but I am not ready to get you an e-ring, and I don't want you to interpret it as an e-ring, but I am committing myself to you by giving you this ring and promising that I shall marry you later on." Isn't being in a committed relationship promising enough? Why add the ring to the factor if you aren't getting married yet but promising to get married later on? I don't know but thats just my .02
  • SwazzleSwazzle New Jersey
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    Swazzle said:
    I honestly don't get why you guys are getting so heated about her "promise ring". It's a piece of jewelry that has meaning between her and her bf, not them and you. So why do you care so much? Geez. 

    Anyway, back to the main topic as well - I was previously engaged at a young age and fell into the diamond thing. This isn't a knock to anyone who loves diamonds, but now I've seen the truth of the diamond industry, and really wanted to try and get something eco-friendly or not a diamond. As luck would have it, my FI's parents had a beautiful sapphire surrounded by small diamonds from his great aunt, so I got it fixed up and now it is my e-ring, and I love it. Even if it was a diamond, it was still a reused one and not a new one, so I would have been happy with that.

    However, when I received the sapphire it had a slight chip in it so we had to get it polished, as is the downside of getting something softer than a diamond, that it'll require a bit more care. I've just had it for a month so I doubt I'll need to polish it again for a long time though...
    Heated? No. We are allowed to share our opinions even if they differ from yours and whomever else's.
    Yes, everyone IS entitled to their own opinion, but when someone says "Just admit it, it's a pacifier for the real deal." it's going overboard, trying to force your opinion onto someone else. Sorry, but that to me is rude and drawing the line. She's not hurting anyone by having a something that's symbolic between her and her bf. To force someone to think your way is just ridiculous.
    That comment was directed at someone who originally came to the board needing to get engaged RIGHTTHISSECOND (and IMO is still quite BSC). So, that comment was actually fully warranted. 

    Thanks for playing, though. 



  • SwazzleSwazzle New Jersey
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    member
    edited September 2013
    Swazzle said:
    Swazzle said:
    I honestly don't get why you guys are getting so heated about her "promise ring". It's a piece of jewelry that has meaning between her and her bf, not them and you. So why do you care so much? Geez. 

    Anyway, back to the main topic as well - I was previously engaged at a young age and fell into the diamond thing. This isn't a knock to anyone who loves diamonds, but now I've seen the truth of the diamond industry, and really wanted to try and get something eco-friendly or not a diamond. As luck would have it, my FI's parents had a beautiful sapphire surrounded by small diamonds from his great aunt, so I got it fixed up and now it is my e-ring, and I love it. Even if it was a diamond, it was still a reused one and not a new one, so I would have been happy with that.

    However, when I received the sapphire it had a slight chip in it so we had to get it polished, as is the downside of getting something softer than a diamond, that it'll require a bit more care. I've just had it for a month so I doubt I'll need to polish it again for a long time though...
    Heated? No. We are allowed to share our opinions even if they differ from yours and whomever else's.
    Yes, everyone IS entitled to their own opinion, but when someone says "Just admit it, it's a pacifier for the real deal." it's going overboard, trying to force your opinion onto someone else. Sorry, but that to me is rude and drawing the line. She's not hurting anyone by having a something that's symbolic between her and her bf. To force someone to think your way is just ridiculous.
    That comment was directed at someone who originally came to the board needing to get engaged RIGHTTHISSECOND (and IMO is still quite BSC). So, that comment was actually fully warranted. 

    Thanks for playing, though. 
    I am trying to refrain from posting due to some major heavy shit in my life right now, but the comment about the promise ring being a pacifier for the real thing was directed at me. And I never came on here needing to get engaged right away or saying so. And I personally feel offended that anyone would think that(or that I am BSC).

    @thejinxchan, thank you for defending my view point but I had already settled that argument.
    Coulda fooled me (and a shitton of other people). 



    But ok. 

    ETA: You've also said that you were leaving TK at least twice now (on two separate occasions) and clearly you're still lurking at the very least. 



    [Deleted User]buddysmom80
  • Swazzle said:
    I honestly don't get why you guys are getting so heated about her "promise ring". It's a piece of jewelry that has meaning between her and her bf, not them and you. So why do you care so much? Geez. 

    Anyway, back to the main topic as well - I was previously engaged at a young age and fell into the diamond thing. This isn't a knock to anyone who loves diamonds, but now I've seen the truth of the diamond industry, and really wanted to try and get something eco-friendly or not a diamond. As luck would have it, my FI's parents had a beautiful sapphire surrounded by small diamonds from his great aunt, so I got it fixed up and now it is my e-ring, and I love it. Even if it was a diamond, it was still a reused one and not a new one, so I would have been happy with that.

    However, when I received the sapphire it had a slight chip in it so we had to get it polished, as is the downside of getting something softer than a diamond, that it'll require a bit more care. I've just had it for a month so I doubt I'll need to polish it again for a long time though...
    Heated? No. We are allowed to share our opinions even if they differ from yours and whomever else's.
    Yes, everyone IS entitled to their own opinion, but when someone says "Just admit it, it's a pacifier for the real deal." it's going overboard, trying to force your opinion onto someone else. Sorry, but that to me is rude and drawing the line. She's not hurting anyone by having a something that's symbolic between her and her bf. To force someone to think your way is just ridiculous.

    First of all, read the whole thread and really read it. Like @swazzle said, the pacifier comment was directed to like, three people on here that thought promise rings were "zomg the best thing ever!!!"

    At one point (and please excuse me because this thread is like a month old, why are we bringing it back up) a poster made it same like NEY people (like me) who don't have a promise ring, our relationship is different. I could be getting this confused with the BSC living together thread, idk.

    You want to wear a promise ring, I don't give two fucks, but don't tell me it's the best thing ever when I think for SOME people, a promise ring is a pacifier. And for some people (like me) I'm not going to let a piece of jewelry dictate our relationship status before an engagement. My BF and I talked it out, we have a timeline, no promise ring was exchanged after agreeing on getting engaged this year.

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  • SwazzleSwazzle New Jersey
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    @aliciaharrison

    Afternoon ladies. I plan to step back from being on the site for a little bit. Unfortunately my mother's health seems to be a rapid downward spiral and it is taking all of my strength to focus on work right now. I have enjoyed the conversations I have had on here but I'm going to refrain from posting or commenting as much as I can to focus on more important things at the moment. 

    Hopefully once things start to settle and things get better I will be back on here more. And who knows maybe in the time I am away and I move in with my BF he'll propose. Lol.



  • SwazzleSwazzle New Jersey
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    And FTR, you don't have to say "I WANT TO GET ENGAGED RIGHT NOW" for us to think/know that you've got a case of the BSC. 



    buddysmom80
  • SwazzleSwazzle New Jersey
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
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    Swazzle said:
    And FTR, you don't have to say "I WANT TO GET ENGAGED RIGHT NOW" for us to think/know that you've got a case of the BSC. 
    Please give me examples of what would cause you to think that I am BSC right now. I have been pretty firm in what I have stated about my BF and I's relationship and where it stands.
    Your very first thread is about where to have your wedding.

    A month later you were doubting your relationship because your BF was being an asshole. 

    Three weeks after that you're looking for a house together because you don't want to get engaged until after you've lived together. 

    Two days later, you come back to NEY with a "hypothetical question" -- which is THE EXACT SAME THING that you asked FOR YOURSELF (NOT hypothetically) in Wedding Woes nearly 2 months prior = where to have your wedding. 

    The point here being that you started with being concerned with where you're going to get married. Then posted some incredibly alarming things regarding your BF and your relationship. You ignored all of our advice. And then came back concerned with where you're going to get married. 

    Just because you add in "but I know it'll happen when we're ready" doesn't meant that saying "I'm so jealous of everyone getting engaged" isn't BSC. 



    buddysmom80KeptInStitches
  • SwazzleSwazzle New Jersey
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    member
  • Swazzle said:
    Swazzle said:
    Swazzle said:
    I honestly don't get why you guys are getting so heated about her "promise ring". It's a piece of jewelry that has meaning between her and her bf, not them and you. So why do you care so much? Geez. 

    Anyway, back to the main topic as well - I was previously engaged at a young age and fell into the diamond thing. This isn't a knock to anyone who loves diamonds, but now I've seen the truth of the diamond industry, and really wanted to try and get something eco-friendly or not a diamond. As luck would have it, my FI's parents had a beautiful sapphire surrounded by small diamonds from his great aunt, so I got it fixed up and now it is my e-ring, and I love it. Even if it was a diamond, it was still a reused one and not a new one, so I would have been happy with that.

    However, when I received the sapphire it had a slight chip in it so we had to get it polished, as is the downside of getting something softer than a diamond, that it'll require a bit more care. I've just had it for a month so I doubt I'll need to polish it again for a long time though...
    Heated? No. We are allowed to share our opinions even if they differ from yours and whomever else's.
    Yes, everyone IS entitled to their own opinion, but when someone says "Just admit it, it's a pacifier for the real deal." it's going overboard, trying to force your opinion onto someone else. Sorry, but that to me is rude and drawing the line. She's not hurting anyone by having a something that's symbolic between her and her bf. To force someone to think your way is just ridiculous.
    That comment was directed at someone who originally came to the board needing to get engaged RIGHTTHISSECOND (and IMO is still quite BSC). So, that comment was actually fully warranted. 

    Thanks for playing, though. 
    I am trying to refrain from posting due to some major heavy shit in my life right now, but the comment about the promise ring being a pacifier for the real thing was directed at me. And I never came on here needing to get engaged right away or saying so. And I personally feel offended that anyone would think that(or that I am BSC).

    @thejinxchan, thank you for defending my view point but I had already settled that argument.
    Coulda fooled me (and a shitton of other people). 



    But ok. 

    ETA: You've also said that you were leaving TK at least twice now (on two separate occasions) and clearly you're still lurking at the very least. 
    I stated I would take a step back from posting. I still lurk because I enjoy reading what is being said.

    And I would like to know where the fuck I stated that I needed to get engaged right away or where I commented to make you and everyone else think that I was BSC.

    I am currently going through some really heavy shit with my mother's health to the point that I'm so mentally done with everything, I don't even remember my ride home from work yesterday. My mother told me on Tuesday when I called and talked to her that she actually died when she passed out on Monday and ended up bringing herself back to life. Worrying that I am going to get the worst call of my life while trying to focus on work as well as my own life is draining me.


    WTF?

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    SwazzleKeptInStitches

  • I am currently going through some really heavy shit with my mother's health to the point that I'm so mentally done with everything, I don't even remember my ride home from work yesterday. My mother told me on Tuesday when I called and talked to her that she actually died when she passed out on Monday and ended up bringing herself back to life. Worrying that I am going to get the worst call of my life while trying to focus on work as well as my own life is draining me.


    WTF?

    Reaction GIF: what the fuck?, stare



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    buddysmom80Swazzle
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