Stressed Out

ebpaulsen

I have always dreamed of eloping to a beach somewhere. Thankfully, my fiance (sort of) agreed with me. Only, he wants immediate family and close friends vs. just the two of us. Which was completely fine by me... until several people began to be negative and voice their opinions openly with me: "Destination weddings are selfish", etc. Has anyone else had to deal with Debbie Downers?

shoebunnie

I have had a similar experience.  We are having about 12 people at our Vegas wedding.  I had someone ask me why not have a wedding in Vegas (the two of us) and a reception at home.  Neither one of us want a big wedding (or reception).  I explained to her the reason we wanted to get married in Vegas was because we didn't want a big extravaganza.  I invited my family and a few friends and my fiancé is opting to not invite anyone.  If the people we invited can make it, great!  If not, that's okay too.  The wedding is about us committing our lives to one another, the rest is just a bonus.  Good luck!

[Deleted User]

I agree with Shoebunnie. We had some folks that were concerned about travelling (we didn't even end up going out of the country!) and we put it out there and let everyone make their own decisions. We let everyone know this was OUR dream for the day and that while we would love them to be there we understood if not everyone could make it and we would be happy to share pictures when we got back.

amorg334

We had people who had an issue with us doing a DW.  We pretty much told everyone they are welcome to come.  If they did think it was selfish we told them it is our days not theirs and it is our decision.  

saric83

There are always going to be people who don't agree with your decision, and honestly, you just have to learn to be okay with it and/or just be good at gracefully changing the subject.

At the end of the day, any kind of destination wedding is a lot to ask of people, and as long as you acknowledge it, most people chill out. 

If it comes up again, you could just say something like, "We understand where you're coming from, but it's important to us to have a small celebration.  Our alternative was just eloping by ourselves, but we didn't want people to feel left out, so we wanted to at least open up the invitation to those closest to us.  So while we would love to have you with us, we do completely understand if you're unable to join us."