Speeches

Stina51286

Who is doing it? You, FI, or Both?

FI  hates hates hates talking in public so I am stuck doing it. I was shaking profusely at my shower, I don't know how I am going to do this in front of 200+ people.

EmilyTork

Wait, we have to do a speech????

If that's the case, it will be FI. I have terrible anxiety. While he will be nervous and will likely try to pass it off, he's a better choice than I.

Stina51286

Every wedding I've been to/in the Bride and/or Groom has given a speech thanking everyone for coming and whatnot.

09McSteph03

The only speeches I have seen done at weddings are from fathers and the BM/MOH.  

I did consider doing this though when I anticipated many more people to attend.  I think now though that we should be able to personally thank everyone.  I think with your kind of guest list it will be very sweet to stand and thank everyone during dinner and still hope to see everyone personally but 200 is a lot of people to visit and talk to and still enjoy the night all in a matter of a few hours. 

rustytammy

I really wanted each of us to say something at the reception.  Each of us thanking those family and friends who came and then something sweet to each other.  However, I have been informed that he will not being doing any kind of speech.  So left up to me!  Thank goodness, thanks to being chapter president of an association, I'm good with public speaking.

shannie11

Fiance is giving one at the rehersal dinner.  I am the same way as you!  I get really nervous.  Who knows after a glass of wine it may be me!  We want to thank everyone for participating in our day and helping us out.  We haven't decided if we want to do gifts at this point or wait until the next day.

Stina51286

@rustytammy, I am okay with smaller groups. Groups of over 200, I have no idea. I was drunk when I gave my speech at my sister's wedding. FI can barely talk in a group of 10, imagine him with 200+, not happening.

@shannie11, gifts at rehearsal or when are you talking? We'll be giving everyone their gifts at rehearsal dinner. Probably in between the time people order and waiting for it to come out.

schellzinator

I've only ever seen speeches by the B&G at the rehearsal dinner and that is what we were planning on doing. My guess is we will both say something brief. As for speeches at the wedding - I'm not sure who will be giving a toast - we need to check with the bridal party. 

SewInLoveWithDMB

I hadn't thought about this. I don't mind talking to crowds or in front of any number of people, so it's not something I'm against doing, but didn't think about it until now. At my shower, I gave a short "thank you so much for coming and for your generosity" before opening the gifts, but it really wasn't planned and just sorta happened.

I think my 2 MOHs and the Best Man will be giving speeches.

Stina51286

I know my MOH and FI's BM plan on doing speeches. I guess I just thought it was customary for the B&G to say a speech thanking everyone for coming. Hmm.

shannyb41

We aren't doing an actual speech because my parents are hosting.  My dad will get up and say a few words and then halfway through the reception we will say a quick thank you to everyone.  But that's really it. We are keeping it short and sweet.

I've actually only been to 1 wedding where the bride/groom made any type of speech.  

rustytammy

Stina51286 said:

@rustytammy, I am okay with smaller groups. Groups of over 200, I have no idea. I was drunk when I gave my speech at my sister's wedding. FI can barely talk in a group of 10, imagine him with 200+, not happening.

@shannie11, gifts at rehearsal or when are you talking? We'll be giving everyone their gifts at rehearsal dinner. Probably in between the time people order and waiting for it to come out.

The first time I had to speak at a regional meeting I thought the butterflies would just come rushing out of my mouth!  LOL  I think after a couple of glasses of wine you will be great!  ;-)

shannie11

well I  wasn't sure if I should give them at the rehersal dinner or wait until my moms house when we are getting ready so that way I know everyones jewlery is there.  I guess I will do it the night of the dinner.  I just get so nervous!  I used to waitress and this crowd will only be less than 30 I think.  So i shouldn't be too bad LOL.  The only thing that concerns me is that one of my bridesmaid said "she didn't need another tote bag " and i got her one!  I also got her other things to go in it including her bridal jewlery.  I just think she expected me to either pay for her hair or makeup which has my stomach in knots because I am not.

09McSteph03

alisonmarie658 said:

The DJ will be under strict guidelines to hand NO ONE the mic.

Totally the opposite for us.  No one has come forward to say they WANT to speak and I refuse to ask anyone to.  So...if someone feels brazen, let them speak.  But I will tackle anyone who abuses it.  

09McSteph03

Is it rude if we don't speak to thank everyone?  I am considering putting a thank-you note on the tables as well as visiting everyone.  No receiving line.  

simplykayla

I think FI and I will be doing a thank you toast at some point during the reception. We both hate speaking in front of people though, so we'll see how that goes and who loses the draw on who'll have to speak haha.
And then we've asked my best friend and his best friend if they would like to say something, as well as my mom and his dad (those are the parents that we're both closest with and neither my dad or his mom would want to say anything anyway).

We didn't want to do open toasts so they didn't just keep going, but I have a feeling one of my sisters will want to say something, so I might have to allow her that (she was really offended when she wasn't allowed to make a toast at our dad's wedding, and I don't want the same thing to happen at mine).

[Deleted User]

We'll be doing "free for all" speeches at the rehearsal dinner. Basically, if anyone who is in attendance wants to speak, they're more than welcome to.

At the reception MOH & BM will be giving toasts, FIL (though I still have to confirm this with Dad) will be saying a blessing, and we will be thanking our guests for making the trip out to party with us. As most of our guests are OOT, we are not hosting them all at the RD, so we will thank them during the reception. Not sure when yet, maybe right before cake?

SewInLoveWithDMB

09McSteph03 said:

Is it rude if we don't speak to thank everyone?  I am considering putting a thank-you note on the tables as well as visiting everyone.  No receiving line.  

I don't think it is rude to not give a speech, but you should have contact with each guest at some point. This can either be done through the receiving line or visiting each table. If you don't want to do a receiving line, then be sure to see each person at the reception.

vainemerald

We are having a live band and since my FH is a drummer we are going to do our thank you speech and then he will get on stage with my brother who is a guitarist/singer and play a song for our guests. I hope this will be a nice touch. I don't think the thank you speech has to be long and involved and I too get nervous in front of crowds. A simple thank you for coming should suffice.

thejucheidea

Hells to the hell no, I'm not making a speech. My fiance probably won't either, and we're not asking people to do speeches. I suppose if they feel taken by the spirit or something, they can pick up a microphone and say words into it, but it's not to be expected.