Invitation Etiquette - Grooms Parents paying, Brides parent's divorced, one remarried and one single

[Deleted User]

Help! I am so confused on how to word my wedding invitation. My fiancés(the groom) parents are paying about 90% of the wedding. My mother is single and my father is remarried, and I want to include my stepmother on the invitation. I had originally worded it with Mr. and Mrs. (Groom's parents name) together with Mr.(brides father) and Ms. (bride's mother) request the honor of your presence at the Nuptial Mass of their children.... Bride's mom kept the same last name as Bride's father since the divorce. How do I include my stepmother? I listed the groom's parents first since they are primarily paying for the wedding.

NYCMercedes

There's a lot of ways you could do this. Is it important to you to have all the parents' names on the invitation? You could do Mr. and Mrs. John Doe on one line, next line is Mrs. Mary Smith, and third line is Mr. and Mrs. George Smith ... Request the honor of your presence at.... Also, as the event hosts are all that is really needed on the invitation, you could just do his parent's names, if they are truly acting as hosts? Need more info!

Jen4948

Who's paying isn't relevant.

I'd actually use "together with their families" in this situation, rather than try to list everyone's names because you have a complicated situation and this would make it easier, but if you insist on listing everyone's names, you could put Groom's Parents request the honour of your presence/pleasure of your company at the marriage of Bride/daughter of Bride's Mom/Bride's Father and Stepmother/to their son/Groom/etc.

HisGirlFriday13

Whomever is hosting the wedding gets his or her names on the invitations. Hosting =/= paying.

One does not "pay" to appear on a wedding invitation; it's not like a symphony or an orchestra where you get to pay for sponsorship.

You have a few options: 

1. Together with their families, [Bride's full name] and [Groom's full name] request the honour of your presence/request the pleasure of your company (the first is if the wedding is physically in a church, the second is if it's not).

That's the one I recommend, because it's the easiest and most inclusive.

2. If you're going to list everyone's parents, the bride's parents go first, mother first of them.

Ms. Sally Jones

and 

Mr. and Mrs. Joe Jones

request (see above)

at the marriage of their daughter,
Susie Mae
(yes people will know who's your mother and who's your stepmother)

to

Joe Johnson

son of 

Mr. and Mrs. Jeff Johnson

at time, date, place

I really strongly recommend the first wording, because it includes everyone and hurts no one's feelings.

WonderRed

Ditto PPs suggestion of "together with our families."  Ours said:

Because your love and friendship are near and dear to our hearts

Bride Full Name
and
Groom Full Name

Together with our families

Invite you to join us as we exchange marriage vows and celebrate our love.

Date
Time
Location

mikencindy

I am in the EXACT same situation. My fiances parents are footing the bill but out of respect, they agreed with putting all parents names on our invite. Fiances parents first, mother then father and stepmother. Good luck!

aurianna

His parents are paying. Are they hosting? If they're hosting (fielding the RSVPs, doing some fo teh planning, greeting the guests, possibly giving the welcome toast at dinner, whatever other hosty things there are) then you really only need their names on the invites.

Being listed by name on the invite isn't a special honor; it just tells people who the host of the event is. It's informational only.

The one rule I know for sure though, don't separate your mother and father with an 'and'. Only couples should get an and.
On our invites we just gave each set of parents their own line:

Aurianna's Mother
Aurianna's Father and Stepmother
Request the honor of your presence at the marriage of their daughter



But agree with PP... "Together with their families" is really probably the safest and easiest bet. It will also keep the invites from looking too crowded.

melbelleup

Together with their families is your best bet.

dramamonkey

My parents are divorced, though neither is remarried. 

Mine says:

Together with their parents,

Mom of the Bride and Dad of the bride & Mom and Dad of the Groom,

Dramamonkey and Future Mr. Dramamonkey

Invite you to....

ETA: FI and I are paying the largest chunk of the wedding. 

I originally wanted it to just say Together with their parents, Dramamonkey and Future Mr. Dramamonkey invite you to...

MairePoppy

The hosts of the wedding get to decide on the wording and style of the invitations. Your FILs should have the privilege of issuing the invitations, with their names on them, if that's what they want. If I was paying for 90% of the wedding, I'd think it was very rude to issue a 'together with their families' invite.

southernbelle0915

Who's hosting? If your fiance's parents are hosting their name goes in the host slot. If they are footing the bill but the two of you are hosting, use wording for that:

The honour of your presence
is requested at the marriage of
Heather Marie Smith
to Michael Francis Jacobson
Saturday, the seventeenth of May
two thousand and fourteen
at half after four in the afternoon

Blah Blah Church

Anywhere, NY