XP: invitation start time etiquette

cruffino

my ceremony is starting at 4 PM sharp. the church we are getting married in is very serious about starting and ending on time, as in they impose late fees. i planned to put 4 PM on the invitations. today, the wedding coordinator at the church suggested that i put 3:30 PM, so that guests will be on time. 

i'm not comfortable with this. as a guest, if i receive an invitation that says 4, i'll arrive between 3:30-3:45, assuming that it will start at 4, not that i should arrive at 4. i don't like my time wasted and i don't want to waste the time of my guests. 

i'm thinking that i'll go with my original plan of putting 4 PM, but would like your feedback. what should i do?

LiLe422

cruffino said:

my ceremony is starting at 4 PM sharp. the church we are getting married in is very serious about starting and ending on time, as in they impose late fees. i planned to put 4 PM on the invitations. today, the wedding coordinator at the church suggested that i put 3:30 PM, so that guests will be on time. 

i'm not comfortable with this. as a guest, if i receive an invitation that says 4, i'll arrive between 3:30-3:45, assuming that it will start at 4, not that i should arrive at 4. i don't like my time wasted and i don't want to waste the time of my guests. 

i'm thinking that i'll go with my original plan of putting 4 PM, but would like your feedback. what should i do?

The coordinator is wrong.  Put 4:00 on the invitation.

Jen4948

You should always put the start time of the ceremony as your start time.  If the ceremony will start at 4pm, that's the time you should put.

It really isn't appropriate to try to manipulate guests into getting there earlier by putting an earlier or later start time on the invitations.  Some people unfortunately will probably show up late anyway, and in that instance, they will have to be unobtrusively seated in the back after you walk down the aisle and the ceremony starts, or wait outside the sanctuary until after the ceremony if that isn't possible. You just have to hope that they will arrive a little early.

cruffino

thanks, i'm sticking with 4 PM.