Honeymoon Registry - Honeyfund And WePay

teresadanna

My husband and I decided to use honeyfund for our honeymoon registry for our trip to France. Through honeyfund we chose WePay for deposits. We ended up having a horrible experience with WePay. My mothers gift to us was flagged by her card as fraud, so WePay pulled the gift (as well as a fee) from my checking account. When the charge had been verified and resent to WePay, WePay never redeposited the gift or the fee. Instead they've told us at least 5 different reasons why they don't have it or they can't give it to us. If you do a honeymoon registry, make sure to use a reputable company for deposits, not a slimy company like WePay.

JoanE2012

teresadanna said:

My husband and I decided to use honeyfund for our honeymoon registry for our trip to France. Through honeyfund we chose WePay for deposits. We ended up having a horrible experience with WePay. My mothers gift to us was flagged by her card as fraud, so WePay pulled the gift (as well as a fee) from my checking account. When the charge had been verified and resent to WePay, WePay never redeposited the gift or the fee. Instead they've told us at least 5 different reasons why they don't have it or they can't give it to us. If you do a honeymoon registry, make sure to use a reputable company for deposits, not a slimy company like WePay.

Or, you can just not have a honeymoon registry.  Not only is the concept rude, but you're basically letting a company take a percentage of your gift when your guest can easily write a check and you get the whole amount.

RebeccaB88

You seriously didn't see the sticky post RIGHT ABOVE YOURS that explains why honeymoon registries are a rude idea?

You kinda got what you deserved there.

LondonLisa

teresadanna said:

My husband and I decided to use honeyfund for our honeymoon registry for our trip to France. Through honeyfund we chose WePay for deposits. We ended up having a horrible experience with WePay. My mothers gift to us was flagged by her card as fraud, so WePay pulled the gift (as well as a fee) from my checking account. When the charge had been verified and resent to WePay, WePay never redeposited the gift or the fee. Instead they've told us at least 5 different reasons why they don't have it or they can't give it to us. If you do a honeymoon registry, make sure to use a reputable company for deposits, not a slimy company like WePay.

Sorry, but when you scam your guests you should expect to be scammed back. By doing a honeymoon registry you are tricking your guests into thinking they're giving you experiences when in fact you are just getting a cheque at the end of the day (minus the fees the company takes).

Future posters- never ever ever do a honeymoon registry. Even if you don't read the sticky (literally right above this post), all you need to do is look at the number of rude brides on here complaining about the companies they did their honemoon/cash/ gift card registries through. You are not a charity so it is beyond rude and tacky to beg for donations!

NYCMercedes

Slimy company, slimy idea to do a HM registry. They go hand in hand. Everybody is trying to get their share of the money pie, including slimy brides and grooms.

MNVegas

This is a great example of why so many people on this board advise against cash registries, not to mention the fact that asking for cash is inappropriate. Why didn't your mother just write you a check? It is not like she was buying you an actual gift from the HM registry. She was giving you cash! Not a very smart move on both your parts to use HM registry. 

Hopefully other brides will learn from your mistake.

cami702

I came across his post looking for information regarding honeymoon registries and I cant believe the responses of grown women who claim to such experts on etiquette. Thank you @teresadanna for your post, thats what these boards are for. Times have changed and so have gift giving, so for all those who are still on these wedding sites years after their wedding...GET A LIFE.

chibiyui

cami702 said:

I came across his post looking for information regarding honeymoon registries and I cant believe the responses of grown women who claim to such experts on etiquette. Thank you @teresadanna for your post, thats what these boards are for. Times have changed and so have gift giving, so for all those who are still on these wedding sites years after their wedding...GET A LIFE.

A more effective way to get cash for Honeymoons, down payments, etc, is to have a small registry and spread word of mouth that you are saving for xyz.

I also thought the attitude towards honeyfund and such here was outdated, but examples like Teresadanna's show they're just not good. I don't have a 5% transaction fee to deal with on my place settings at Crate and Barrel, so why should I deal with it for another registry?

MobKaz

cami702 said:

I came across his post looking for information regarding honeymoon registries and I cant believe the responses of grown women who claim to such experts on etiquette. Thank you @teresadanna for your post, thats what these boards are for.  (1.) Times have changed and so have gift giving, so for all those who are still on these wedding sites years after their wedding... (2.) GET A LIFE.

1.  I'm pretty sure that historically, no one enjoys being ripped off.  By having a honeymoon registry, you are actually encouraging your guests to be ripped off.  Would you enjoy gifting someone a place setting only to find out that the saucer was not included once you paid for it?

2.  I will interrupt my eye roll and yawn just long enough to inform you that this is THE most unoriginal statement made. 

cami702

@mobkaz and chibiyui I am not disputing the fact that it was wrong what the company did or the fact that there are "beware" stories out there. What i dont like is she wrote the post to inform others and all she received is "thats what you get", "your scammin you guest". MANY things you do or buy has a service fee, so @ mobkaz you can roll your eyes as much as you like..my life will go on!!

JoanE2012

cami702 said:

I came across his post looking for information regarding honeymoon registries and I cant believe the responses of grown women who claim to such experts on etiquette. Thank you @teresadanna for your post, thats what these boards are for. Times have changed and so have gift giving, so for all those who are still on these wedding sites years after their wedding...GET A LIFE.

Times may have changed, but proper etiquette stands the test of time.

chibiyui

cami702 said:

@mobkaz and chibiyui I am not disputing the fact that it was wrong what the company did or the fact that there are "beware" stories out there. What i dont like is she wrote the post to inform others and all she received is "thats what you get", "your scammin you guest". MANY things you do or buy has a service fee, so @ mobkaz you can roll your eyes as much as you like..my life will go on!!

Many things in life do have service fees, but what you do with your money is different then suggesting how other spend their money on you. I was just hoping to point out that these types of registries aren't good in, shall we say, a less abrasive way. And those types of registries DO scam your guests. It's also a topic that keeps coming up. When I first started commenting I mouthed off to some posters here about how they were responding a person asking what was the best charity registry, and directed her to a different site. In my time lurking here I have learned that what I thought was just outdated (etiquette pertaining non-traditional registries) was in fact still relevant and true. I don't want to have my guests give me money through a third party thats going to take a cut of the gift to me. So anytime these topics come up, I'll try to mention the small-registry-word-of-mouth in hopes someone will change their mind and choose not to use one of those registries. 

And yeah, the response was harsher then it needed to be (after all, the damage was done). Thats the interwebs for you. Also, it took the no bullshit approach of this board for me to reconsider my own stance. 

MobKaz

cami702 said: @mobkaz and chibiyui I am not disputing the fact that it was wrong what the company did or the fact that there are "beware" stories out there. What i dont like is she wrote the post to inform others and all she received is "thats what you get", "your scammin you guest". MANY things you do or buy has a service fee, so @ mobkaz you can roll your eyes as much as you like..my life will go on!!

YOU are missing the point.  It is not the company that is scamming the bride.  It is the bride who is scamming her guests.  Do you honestly believe that ONE guest would "purchase" something off a honeymoon registry if they knew the bride was not getting their full gift?  (And I use the term purchase loosely because IN FACT the guest is actually not purchasing anything.)   Yes, many things for purchase include a service fee, but typically the purchaser is fully aware of those service fees.  Guests making these honeyfund purchases do NOT know they are being ripped off with those hidden fees.

Many long time or regular posters feel a strong need to remain on these boards to correct the ill mannered and socially oblivious suggestions of self centered, egocentric brides-to-be such as yourself.  And if you read something here that you don't like.....too bad, so sad.  Move on then. Rumor has it us life lacking regulars can cast spells.

crunchymamaof2

Registries aren't mandatory. If you don't want tangible things and would prefer cash only, don't register period. It's pretty safe to say that everyone knows cash is a very welcome gift. And those that don't will probably buy you something regardless.

OP, I'm sorry that happened. I won't say you deserved it because I don't think you do. But I do hope you consider this a very important lesson learned. Even though I'm sure you didn't intentionally spam your guests, that's what happened. And unfortunately the site then spammed your guests.

Times have not changed. People(in modern society) have always taken honeymoons. Cash has always been a welcome gift. It's always been rude to directly ask for cash. Plus, people should never be charged for giving cash as a gift. All that = hm registries being in poor taste and a way for the wedding industry to suck even more money out of people.

MyNameIsNot

LondonLisa said:

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teresadanna said:

My husband and I decided to use honeyfund for our honeymoon registry for our trip to France. Through honeyfund we chose WePay for deposits. We ended up having a horrible experience with WePay. My mothers gift to us was flagged by her card as fraud, so WePay pulled the gift (as well as a fee) from my checking account. When the charge had been verified and resent to WePay, WePay never redeposited the gift or the fee. Instead they've told us at least 5 different reasons why they don't have it or they can't give it to us. If you do a honeymoon registry, make sure to use a reputable company for deposits, not a slimy company like WePay.

Sorry, but when you scam your guests you should expect to be scammed back. By doing a honeymoon registry you are tricking your guests into thinking they're giving you experiences when in fact you are just getting a cheque at the end of the day (minus the fees the company takes).

Future posters- never ever ever do a honeymoon registry. Even if you don't read the sticky (literally right above this post), all you need to do is look at the number of rude brides on here complaining about the companies they did their honemoon/cash/ gift card registries through. You are not a charity so it is beyond rude and tacky to beg for donations!

This, exactly.  

You can't set up a "registry" to scam your guests and then get upset when it scams your guests.  I'm sorry your mother was duped, by you.  

Dreamergirl8812

cami702 said:

I came across his post looking for information regarding honeymoon registries and I cant believe the responses of grown women who claim to such experts on etiquette. Thank you @teresadanna for your post, thats what these boards are for. Times have changed and so have gift giving, so for all those who are still on these wedding sites years after their wedding...GET A LIFE.

@cami702, You're right! I can't believe how mean people are! I can't believe they were all saying to get a life!

Oh wait, that was you.