Wording for after party

DandJNYC

Hi!

We are having an open bar rehearsal dinner, and open bar day time/lunch reception. Around 9pm, we want our friends to meet up with us at our favorite bar for drinks and dancing, but we would like everyone to pay their own way for that. How do I phrase that in the after-party invitation so it doesn't sound rude but makes it clear?

Thanks!

LDubHawksFan

Are these friends that are at the wedding earlier? If so, I think the best route is word of mouth that the b&g will be at the bar x after and to join if you'd like. Any formal invitation indicates that you are hosting them, which you don't intend to. Don't outright put "not hosted" because it looks tacky...and this is coming from a person who just got an invitation saying that.
If these friends aren't invited to the wedding, don't do this. It's tiered and rude.

tigersgirlgv

Others here may correct me if I'm wrong, but if you are sending invitations, then you are hosting the event and must pay for drinks. If you casually mention to your friends that you will be at such and such bar after the reception, then you do not need to pay.

NYCMercedes

Hi!

We are having an open bar rehearsal dinner, and open bar day time/lunch reception. Around 9pm, we want our friends to meet up with us at our favorite bar for drinks and dancing, but we would like everyone to pay their own way for that. How do I phrase that in the after-party invitation so it doesn't sound rude but makes it clear?

Thanks!

Don't do an invitation as you'll no longer be hosting. Just spread it by word of mouth where you'll be after the wedding reception.

annathy03

Ditto @lwoehlk.

Tell people where you plan to be and have it spread word-of-mouth, if you send out invitations people will expect it to be a hosted event.

Dreamergirl8812

DandJNYC said:

Hi!

We are having an open bar rehearsal dinner, and open bar day time/lunch reception. Around 9pm, we want our friends to meet up with us at our favorite bar for drinks and dancing, but we would like everyone to pay their own way for that. How do I phrase that in the after-party invitation so it doesn't sound rude but makes it clear?

Thanks!

Can I come?

(Also, PPs are correct).

Jen4948

Just do it by word of mouth.  If you put anything about it in an invitation, then it is going to come off as rude if you indicate that your guests have to pay for themselves.

mysticl

Also, by not sending out formal invitations you aren't locking yourself into being there for a specific amount of time.  I know the after party sounds like a great idea now but come the day of your wedding you might only be up for spending an hour at the bar.  

clg1213

Question since I may have something similar...both in lieu of a RD (no rehearsal, may see if folks want to stop by a pizza place...very unsure if we'll do it) and after a dry brunch reception (would do hotel bar several hours after the reception)....Is it appropriate to mention on a wedding website or not?  How about in a "welcome note" in OOT bags? 

ameraznhuney

We put the after party information on our wedding website, but will not be sending the info out with our formal invites.. basically worded it as "hey, we're going to be here at this time, you're welcome to show up and keep partying, we will be"  in a much nicer way of course, but that's the tone.

MyNameIsNot

clg1213 said:

Question since I may have something similar...both in lieu of a RD (no rehearsal, may see if folks want to stop by a pizza place...very unsure if we'll do it) and after a dry brunch reception (would do hotel bar several hours after the reception)....Is it appropriate to mention on a wedding website or not?  How about in a "welcome note" in OOT bags? 

If you aren't hosting, don't put an invitation in writing anywhere.