Dear Abby: We've waited 25-years - isn't 2014 our year?

LakeR2014

I know Mrs. Conn always puts these out, but I saw this one today and wanted to see what the Knot community thought of it....


DEAR ABBY: Our son recently told us he will be proposing to his girlfriend before Christmas. We're happy for him, but concerned that he'll want to get married next year, which will be our 25th anniversary. We can't afford to celebrate our 25th the way we want to and help with their expensive wedding. We have been planning this for years, and we don't want to sacrifice our celebration for their plans. We think they should either postpone the wedding or pay for it themselves. We have always taken care of our son, but we feel 2014 is "our" time. Are we wrong, and how can we tell him without feeling guilty? -- PARENTS OF THE FUTURE GROOM

hmonkey

YOU GET ONE DAY. 

NOLABridesmaid

Does this sound like anyone we know??????

ReturnOfKuus

Can't they just not pay for the son's expensive wedding?

mrsconn23

WTF?

"Son, we're so excited for you and we can't wait to welcome your GF to the family!" 

AND THEN, if the entitled shit (because you raised him that way) asks for money, "Sorry son, we'll be unable to contribute to your wedding, please take this into account when planning."  Boom, done!

GBCK

How many carts can one couple put ahead of one tiny horse?

Not engaged yet.  No wedding date set yet.  No wedding (cheap or expensive) planned yet.  No discussion about who pays for what yet.

!

hmonkey

zsazsa-stl

NerdyLucy

ReturnOfKuus said:

Can't they just not pay for the son's expensive wedding?

THIS.

WildMagelet

I would continue my anniversary celebration as planned. 

If helping my son with his wedding was on my priority list, then I would sit down with my husband and determine what help we can gift, if any, next year and what help we can gift, if any, the following year.  IF they chose to get married in 2014 without our financial assistance, perhaps we could gift them a belated honeymoon or a monetary donation towards the downpayment on a home instead.

They aren't engaged yet.  They don't have a date yet.  They don't have plans for an "expensive" wedding yet.  If the parents have been planning their 25th anniversary party for year, their son it likely to be aware of it and will probably take that into consideration.