Wedding Etiquette Forum
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Would you?

loca4pookloca4pook member
First Comment Name Dropper 5 Love Its First Anniversary
edited October 2013 in Wedding Etiquette Forum

I posted a few weeks about someone who keeps telling me they have gift for me and I am pretty sure it doesnt exist despite them saying to me numerous times. Anyhow, they have "struck" again. They have said to me without any type of prompting... "oh, I have your gift at home. It needs to be assembled. I will bring it on Monday but remind me.....(long pause) but I have a year to give it to you anyway". of course, monday came..the gift never did nor was there any type of comment again.

Given that the person said "remind me". Would you? I feel terribly rude doing that, but just wondering what others would do in that situation....

 p.s. Would you be insulted if someone told you they actually :have a gift for you but, that they have a year to give it to you." there was something about that comment that didn't quite sit right with me

 

 

 

Re: Would you?

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    I would totally "remind" her. If she actually does have a gift for you, you need to keep us updated.
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    People pull this crap a lot unfortunately. Rather than "remind" her, I'd leave it alone and if she ever said something about it again,  just say "Look, it's fine if you don't get me a gift. I don't care."
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    loca4pookloca4pook member
    First Comment Name Dropper 5 Love Its First Anniversary
    edited October 2013
    PDKH said:
    People pull this crap a lot unfortunately. Rather than "remind" her, I'd leave it alone and if she ever said something about it again,  just say "Look, it's fine if you don't get me a gift. I don't care."

    Totally true. I admit, this puzzles me. If people feel guilty enough to make the comment repeatedly, why the heck don't they just give the gift to relieve the gift?! LMAO
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    I would just leave it alone.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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    Because words are cheap.
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    That is really obnoxious. And if the gift exists, just think of all that build up. If you have to open it in front of her, be all:
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    Anniversary
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    I wouldn't say anything at all. I don't think it's worth the effort. 
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    That is really obnoxious. And if the gift exists, just think of all that build up. If you have to open it in front of her, be all:
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    OMG, this is my total worry! LMAO...First, she told me it was "something small" now it is something that needs to be "assembled". I am kinda scared that after all this, what the heck it could even be..though, realistically speaking, I am pretty sure it doesn't exist.........

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    I'm sure she just got you a baby t rex and is waiting for it to clear customs...*rolls eyes*

    We had a couple people say they weren't able to make it but would send us something...yeah not really.  Luckily, none of them are constantly updating me on a non-existent gift though so good luck.
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    I would never remind a person to give me a gift, even if they ask me to.
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    That sounds fishy. Gift-giving isn't mandatory, so if someone wants to give you a gift they should, but they shouldn't need you to remind them.  I'd just forget about it, as opposed to reminding the person.
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    eileenrob said:
    That sounds fishy. Gift-giving isn't mandatory, so if someone wants to give you a gift they should, but they shouldn't need you to remind them.  I'd just forget about it, as opposed to reminding the person.

    i never said it was mandatory. I would have moved on from day one, but she repeatedly brings it up to ME unprompted in any way.. that was my point. It is extremely awkward at this point
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    I wouldn't remind her, and next time she brings it up, just say something nice (can't wait/looking forward to it/no worries) and change the subject.  If she asks why you didn't remind her, say you forgot all about it.  

    And the reason it's insulting to say "well I have a year to give it to you" is because it implies that you would come find her after a year and demand your gift when you were never expecting one from her (and would never demand a gift in any case).  I would just brush it off, though.  Not worth getting into a conversation about how gifts aren't mandatory, how she doesn't have to pretend (or if she is pretending), etc.  
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