My fMIL and fFIL are Hijacking the Engagement Party Invitee List. They are demanding that I add some of thier family friends (that They consider family) to the engagement as other friends of the family that we had invited declined. (Today is the RSVP end date, with our follow-up all done tomorrow via phone) I had previously at a luncheon been talking with my mum, and fMIL, and they had between them decided that the invitee list was up to me, as long as it included both his and my sides of the family.
My biggest problem is my fh went behind my back to talk to them about it, and it has all blown up (and way off course), due to the fact, that I wanted ALL of us to have a sit down about it. Not to meantion fMIL practically told this couple and their twin 14yo boys (Who are very obnoxious, and rude to both fh and myself) that we just must have forgotten, and give them the time, date and location of the engagement party.
The other things that is making this such an issue, is the venue (which my mum, dad, and fMIL, and fFIL are all paying for, as far as I know of) only holds 90 people, and our projected attendance rate is sitting at 90... currently we have 62 YES, and 33 No, with a further 28 expected Yes replies, and 33 No replies... However if this Doesn;t happen, and more No's become Yes', then we will be stuck, and causing a fire Hazard.
fh's Mum and Dad say they want them there as they consider them family, and have used the fact that (in the 3 1/2years I have been with fh) have only met them 2ce, so don't really know them. As some sort of Bartering chip, as They now say They don't know everyone on my side of the family. Which is what I thought they whole idea of an engagement party was, so the two sides of the different families could get to know eachother in a relatively informal setting.
Am just wondering with such Tight numbers if my point of having my A-List, which consists of My Family, His Family, and our Combined friends (that we have had close contact with in the last year), and them wanting to invite their family friends (Who are actually on our B-List, as are my old school friends, and his old school friends) Should be loosened on this one occasion, however, If so, please bear in mind that I CANNOT recind any already given invitations (Which leaves me with near 90 invitees who are expected to come)
Frazzled and Annoyed