I've seen on the boards about how you should not host your own pre-wedding parties, so I'm wondering if this engagement party that I went to was against etiquette? This is the only engagement party that I have ever been to since they are not at all the norm in my city/circle.
A friend got engaged and sent out an email to about 25-30 friends that he and FI were hosting their own engagement happy hour party on a week night. I thought happy hour after work with my friends that I am excited to congratulate---cool. It was at a bar that doesn't get a lot of traffic so while it wasn't exclusive use/rented it was 95% full of "engagement party people." It seemed so casual (I don't even know if they requested a RSVP...although I always do anyway) I did not have the impression at all that gifts were the reason for this party. From what I can tell all people invited were also invited to the wedding and I didn't see anyone bring a gift (that doesn't mean that a little something wasn't given here or there and I just didn't see it---I point this out because nothing about this party screamed "gift grabby" to me). They made sure to greet and talk with everyone that attended. During the time the email invitation listed as party time they picked up the tab for all drinks and appetizers. I had a great time congratulating them, hanging out with friends and even making a cool new friend that I ended up getting seated by at the wedding.
You all have such good advice and often point out etiquette faux paus that people may have never considered. So what do you think, was this party against etiquette or was there anything they should have done differently?