Cheap bridesmaid gift ideas?

JackieLynn8807 · March 2010

I have 7 bridesmaids and I've already spent approximately $35 on each of them because I said that i'd buy jewelry and shoes for their bridesmaid gifts. Since they already have their jewelry and shoes, I want to buy something else small for them to give at the wedding. Any ideas? I'd like to spend less than $10-15 on each.

Thanks!

trix1223 · March 2010

The jewelry and shoes aren't a gift for them. They're a gift for you since you want them all to look the same in your wedding.

Go shopping for them like it's their birthday or Christmas. WP gifts don't have to be matchy-matchy. And they don't have to be wedding related.

What would you buy BM #1 for anything OTHER than your wedding? That's what you should get her. Continue the process for #2-7.

CTGirl30 · March 2010

Ditto Trix - you bought shoes & jewelry for them to wear in YOUR wedding (shoes they wouldn't necessarily have chosen for themselves - esp if you picked them out and same with the jewelry).

Think of each girls' personality / style / preferences and go from there. You know your friends better than anyone on this board.

Do they like wine / coffee / gift card to their favorite store or iTunes, etc...of course, adding in a heartfelt thank you letterwith their gifts is an inexpensive way to thank them for being part of your wedding day as well.

JackieLynn8807 · March 2010

Just to clarify, they all picked out their own jewelry and shoes and that's why they have them already.

mbcdefg · March 2010

Is it possible to return the shoes and/or jewelry and get your money back? You could pick out a neutral shoe color and let them choose their own, and let them wear their own jewelry, and then put that money toward more personal gifts for them. (Unless they said they'd rather have shoes and jewelry paid for because even if you let them wear whatever they wanted, they'd still have to go spend money on new stuff?)

Otherwise, just get things they will like. Remember that the gifts don't have to be the same, and that they should not be themed around your wedding.

You can get magazine subscriptions on Amazon.com for under $15 for a year, for certain titles. Marshall's and TJ Maxx have designer handbags for pretty good prices, plus things like books/cookbooks, stationery and notecards, clothes, accessories, bathrobes and slippers, perfumes and bath lotions, etc.

How about a nice photo frame for someone who likes to display photos, and print out a nice photo of the two of you? (Or promise her a nice print once you get your professional wedding photos back.) You can find lots of stuff on Etsy.com ... I got an apron for my MOH who loves to bake, and some bookplate stickers for my MLS grad student BM.

stina93446 · March 2010

So you're saying that the shoes are all different and the jewelry is too? Or is the jewelry all the same?

I am not a huge fan of brides buying shoes and jewelry for the bms. But if you're looking for something "inexpensive" (when you say "cheap" it doesn't sound nice) I'd agree with brooke and get a gc to someplace they frequent and a heartfelt note. If one of them likes books or has a kindle get them a barnes and noble gc or an amazon gc. If someone likes coffee, starbucks. Etc...

JackieLynn8807 · March 2010

I guess I maybe should have told my whole life story when I made this post? Either that or I should have posted this in "budget weddings"? When I say cheap, of course I mean inexpensive. Myself and my bridesmaids are all college students and our budget for this wedding is not huge. While getting shoes and jewelry for bridesmaids might seem tacky or you deem them as "not a gift," for my wedding and for my friends, it's practical. I can see how it would be different if the budget for your wedding is large, but mine isn't and I guess I should have stipulated that... but I shouldn't have had to, honestly, because all I was asking for was for some gift ideas that cost approximately $10-15.

Thanks for the ideas that some of you gave me though.

bablingbrooke · March 2010

When you assume, you make an ass of u and me. I had a budget wedding and I take offense that you assume that because you were told that are doing something that is blatantly not a gift for them but a gift for you that we must have had large, lavish weddings and not understand you. Whether your budget is $100 or $100,000, a non-gift is a non-gift.

stina93446 · March 2010

It doesn't matter the budget, we ALWAYS tell every bride on here that shoes and jewelry are not gifts. Your situation is no different than many of our regulars on this board, even some in the thread that have helped you.

lalap69 · March 2010

We're all on budgets. It doesn't change the fact that the dress and shoes are for your wedding and therefore more gifts for you than for your bms.

stina93446 · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_cheap-bridesmaid-gift-ideas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:7be27f06-9fba-409c-9bbc-b9c012138259Post:d3da672c-fb5e-4665-80cc-98841034b165">Re: Cheap bridesmaid gift ideas?</a>:
[QUOTE]I guess I maybe should have told my whole life story when I made this post? Either that or I should have posted this in "budget weddings"? When I say cheap, of course I mean inexpensive. Myself and my bridesmaids are all college students and our budget for this wedding is not huge. While getting shoes and jewelry for bridesmaids might seem tacky or you deem them as "not a gift," for my wedding and for my friends, it's practical. I can see how it would be different if the budget for your wedding is large, but mine isn't and I guess I should have stipulated that... but I shouldn't have had to, honestly, because all I was asking for was for some gift ideas that cost approximately $10-15. Thanks for the ideas that some of you gave me though.
Posted by JackieLynn8807[/QUOTE]

CTGirl30 · March 2010

I'm pretty positive that not many girls here had or will be having Platinum Weddings.
The point is -

Speaking for myself (as a former BM) I'd rather be given the guidance "Please wear any pair of closed toe black pumps" and that way I could either wear a pair I already owned OR buy a new pair in a style / heel height of my choice that I would be more likely to wear again in the future and be given a larger gift from the bride....rather than be told by the bride, "I'll pay for these shoes that I want you to wear on my wedding day" (that I may never wear again but she liked) and be given a smaller gift.

You had a choice to let them wear their own shoes or jewelry of their own. But by specifying that new shoes and jewelry must be purchased to be worn for your wedding and then offering to pay for it doesn't really = gift to the girls....you're outfitting them in a look you want them to have for your wedding day but it's not in items they may have wanted to go out to purchase for themselves. Esp not if everything matches (which even further eliminates personal taste and preference on their part).

JackieLynn8807 · March 2010

Alrighty. I never meant to irritate anyone, and likewise I'm sure that none of you meant to make me feel bad either.

stina93446 · March 2010

I just want to let you know that you're trying to use your budget as an excuse. Many of the regs are also still in school.

CA2MT4EveR · March 2010

It's real fun when you are sitting at a table during the RD and everyone gets their gift bag. Girl 1 opens her bag to find: Jewelry! Girl 2 opens her bag to find: the same awful never being worn again, jewelry! Gee, I wonder what I am going to get?!

JackieLynn8807 · March 2010

I don't know what else I can say here. Thanks for the advice you gave, I am appreciative, but I think what's bothering me most is that at the very beginning of my post, I said that I already bought them X and X and now I am looking for cheap (shoot, should have said inexpensive, my bad) gifts to go with it (and some of you gave me ideas), but not before telling me what a horrible bride I am because the shoes and the jewelry is not a gift to them it's a gift to myself. I see where you're coming from and I respect that.

aerinpegadrak · March 2010

I'm on a very tight budget, and so are my bridesmaids. So I told them to wear whatever jewelry and shoes they thought would work with the dress. Ta-da! No expense for me, and the expense for them is optional if they already have something that will work. We're all getting our hair done professionally, but that's coming out of my getting ready budget, not their gift budget. I bought all of their gifts on eBay at a fraction of their retail cost.

I think the gift budget is pretty much the last place you should be cutting corners on the overall wedding budget. We've cut back quite a bit in our personal life so that we would be able to afford something nice for our parents and attendants. Personally, I'd feel pretty ashamed if I cheaped out on them.

bablingbrooke · March 2010

No one told you you're a horrible bride.

stina93446 · March 2010

Ditto brooke. You're reading too much into what we say. Just read it for what it is.

leeshab1982 · March 2010

I understand where the OP is coming from. I was a BM in a friend's wedding a few years back when I was still in school. She bought us all shoes and purses as our gifts and I thought it was a great. I didn't have much money or time to shop because I was busy with school and I also didn't really own any nice dress shoes back then. I was pumped when she offered to buy us shoes and purses. I thought that her taking care of this for us WAS thoughtful. Plus they were cute black strappy sandals and I wore them several times after the wedding. I know the general consensus of this board is that nobody's situation is special, but I think that the OP was being considerate of her friends and trying to do something nice that would help them out. She did say they got to pick out their own shoes and jewelry, so I'm sure they picked something that they liked and will wear again. I don't see anything wrong with that. I'd take that over a coffee or book gift card any day.

As for the actual question posted here, you might want to check out etsy.com or another website like that. I found some really cute stuff on there for my girls for around $15. One BM loves wine and has people over quite a bit, so I bought her a handmade cheese tray. It is a pretty green wine bottle melted down flat to make a tray and came with a really cute handmade, beaded cheese spreader. Another BM likes to bake so I found a hand painted dessert dish pedestal in her favorite color. I also plan to buy her an apron from there, as well. She wears them every time she cooks or bakes. Etsy has lots of cute patterns that I've never seen in stores.

Another place that I bought a few gifts for around $15 was Target (I know, right?). They have some cute wallets/clutches right now in many different patterns and colors. They have hard covers so you can use them as a clutch if you're going somewhere that you don't want to carry a purse, but they are small enough to also serve as a wallet. I'm sure you could find something cute like that at T.J. Maxx or Marshalls, too.

Ditto pp about magazine subscriptions on amazon.com, as well. They seem to always have sales where different subscriptions are discounted.

If your girls are still in school, would they have use for a cute laptop bag or messenger bag? I'm sure you could find something like that in your price range, as well.

JackieLynn8807 · March 2010

Thank you so much. You don't know how much I appreciate your post!

trix1223 · March 2010

Don't you just love it when 21 people let a poster know that there's a different (better) way to think about something. Then ONE person comes on who agrees with the original not great idea, and that's the advice the OP loves?

Welcome to validation central.

JackieLynn8807 · March 2010

You know, really, was that necessary? I told everyone before that I appreciated their input and I respect what they are saying.

tinydancer842 · March 2010

I think the problem is brides sometimes don't know any better/think they are doing the right thing then they come on here realize they are wrong & don't/can't take back what they already did.

In this instance the bride already bought the shoes/jewelry & gave it to BMs as a "gift" -- she used up that part of her budget & now only has a little left to spare. You obv. can't now ask them to pay for the shoes/jewelry & then buy them something else for $50.

I think the best solution right now is to admit "hey, i didn't think of it at the time but this isn't a gift for them, but a gift for me & my wedding -- i can't undo the damage, but i can use whatever money i have left to buy them a personal gift they can enjoy" -- problem solved.

banana468 · March 2010

Tinydancer, I think you summed things up well.

anne.azano · March 2010

You can get these cheap totes bags on amazon for like 3 dollars... then get a frame where you can promise to put a photo of all of you together in. You could probably do that for 15 dollars... If you had extra money, you could add some cute things, like lip gloss, a starbucks card, a mini bottle of champagne. I know with 7, each little thing adds up... It's easier for me, because I only have 3. I've already bought tote bags, I'm going to stick some old navy flip flops in there (ask each of them their shoe size if you don't already know). Then in a month when I have a bit of extra cash, I'll buy something else little and let it accumulate.

angegary · March 2010

I disagree with so many on the idea of what's a gift or not a gift. Buying shoes, jewelry, manicures, pedicures can all count a gifts. It's something extra you are doing for them as a thank you. In all the weddings I have been in, I was always so thankful when the shoes, jewlery, etc were paid for by the bride. For me that was enough of a thank you because brides don't have to do that. In the end the time spent with my friends and family who were getting married was more priceless than any object. As long as its from the heart , it doesn't matter what you pick as a gift.

aerinpegadrak · March 2010

My bridesmaids don't have to spend money on shoes, jewelry, or whatever because I'm not making them. Yes, it's nice if the bride takes care of those expenses, but it's even nicer if the bride simply eliminates those expenses and lets her bridesmaids take care of them herself. And yes, if the bride mandates anything beyond the dress, she IS required to pay for it, because it's unnecessary.

If the bride wants to buy me a pair of shoes I'll never wear again so her pictures can be oh-so-perfect, fine. But don't call that a heartfelt gift.

banana468 · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_cheap-bridesmaid-gift-ideas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:7be27f06-9fba-409c-9bbc-b9c012138259Post:8cfd653f-9e61-42f1-869f-e8c40d5c2eac">Re: Cheap bridesmaid gift ideas?</a>:
[QUOTE]I disagree with so many on the idea of what's a gift or not a gift. Buying shoes, jewelry, manicures, pedicures can all count a gifts. It's something extra you are doing for them as a thank you. In all the weddings I have been in, I was always so thankful when the shoes, jewlery, etc were paid for by the bride. For me that was enough of a thank you because brides don't have to do that. In the end the time spent with my friends and family who were getting married was more priceless than any object. As long as its from the heart , it doesn't matter what you pick as a gift.
Posted by angegary[/QUOTE]

These aren't really extras though. They're attire or wedding beauty for YOUR wedding. If these were given to suit the BMs taste and for use at any time then they're presents. If they're for use at the wedding or pre-wedding then they're not presents.

The gift should be from the heart - but it shouldn't be self-serving for the bride either.

angegary · March 2010

I guess I have never been in a wedding were all those things were required of me.....

MyNameIsNot · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_cheap-bridesmaid-gift-ideas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:7be27f06-9fba-409c-9bbc-b9c012138259Post:b37b44e4-eaca-434b-998b-9caa5bb46c02">Re: Cheap bridesmaid gift ideas?</a>:
[QUOTE]I guess I have never been in a wedding were all those things were required of me.....
Posted by angegary[/QUOTE]

<div>Exactly. If the bride wants the BMs to do these things, she pays for it. She can't require that they do it. It is a wedding expense, just like the BM's bouquet. Just like you don't give your BM the bouquet and tell her it's a gift for her, you don't pay for her matching shoes or her mani and tell her it's a gift. It's not. </div>

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