Wedding Etiquette Forum

2 Separate Pre-Wedding Events

Hi Ladies,

I'm a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding across country. The MOH (sister of the bride) wasn't comfortable planning the bachelorette party and asked me to plan the events, and she would help out where needed. I was more than happy to help. She did say that she thought it would be a good idea to have a day time lunch/dinner get-together in the area so the older female family members could attend, and then plan a more traditional drinks/dancing event in the city for whoever wanted to travel (1.5 hours).

I thought that would be fine, and had no problem working out the details.

I asked if she thought 2 separate invites would be appropriate or listing both events on the same invite. She replied with "The first get-together can just be word of mouth or a facebook invite thing, it'll be fine."

I told her I didn't think it would be the best idea to do that, and we should probably add it with the main invites, since everyone is invited to both.

Thoughts? Word of mouth/facebook invite, both events on 1 invite, or 2 separate invites since there will most likely be a couple hour gap?

TIA

Re: 2 Separate Pre-Wedding Events

  • edited March 2012
    I don't think I've ever received an actual paper invitation to a bach party. I've only been to a few, but they've all been word of mouth or maybe an email with specific address information. So in my circle, word of mouth would be appropriate for both, but I might think differently if I were including anyone much older than my BMs.
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  • I'm sorry--I didn't specify what type of invitation we'd send. I was going to send separate email invties. I'm just not a huge fan of the facebook party invites, they seem less personal to me.
  • I've gotten actual paper invites in the mail for bach parties, but I already knew all the information on them which was communicated via e-mail or evite. The paper one wasn't necessary, but so cute! No FB event for it. For the women who don't use technology, I'd at least give them a phone call. 'Word of mouth' might not reach them.

    I'd just treat the entire day as one event. Let everyone invited know both 'sets' of plans. That way, people can choose which they would like to do- the earlier portion, the later portion, or both.
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  • I hate Facebook invites and tend to ignore them. I'd go paper, and yes, 2 different ones (of course you can put both in one envelope for people invited to both).
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  • MBody--I didn't even think of using Evite! And we get those kind of reservations all the time. Silly me.

    Thanks for your suggestions and confirming that I'm not crazy for thinking facebook event invites aren't appropriate.

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  • My BM just threw me a similar event where we started with dinner and then went out the rest of the evening.  My MOH emailed all of the girls who would come to the entire event, dinner & bar hopping.  But my MOH, who is my sister if that matters, called all of the older female relatives herself to invite them to the dinner only portion. 
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