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HELP - Bachelorette Party - Do I have to have one?

OHRunner3OHRunner3
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in Pre-wedding Parties
I have a really big wedding party - 9 girls - 3 of whom are sisters of mine or my fiance.  The problem is, I truly do not want to have a bachelorette party of any kind.  I don't think all the girls will get along and I will feel a lot of pressure to make everyone happy.  It is just a situation I'd rather avoid but a few of the bridesmaids are making me feel like I'm being selfish by not having one.  We are all in our 30's so I didn't think this would be an issue.  Thoughts?  Do I need to do something?
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Re: HELP - Bachelorette Party - Do I have to have one?

  • twilight.rosetwilight.rose member
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    It's a major etiquette breech to throw your own b-party. You only get one if someone (a BM, for example) offers to host it.

    If your BMs think you need one, they can offer to host it. You can, of course, decline any pre-wedding parties if you choose.
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  • waltzingmatilda13waltzingmatilda13 member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    You don't need to do anything but tell your BMs that you don't want a b-party, end of story. They should respect your decision and leave it alone.
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  • OHRunner3OHRunner3
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thank you - that is what I was hoping to hear!  It is just not my thing....it doesn't make the wedding, or my wedding party any less special or important to me.
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  • mysticlmysticl member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    edited December 2011
    There is no need to have a b-party. No idea why your friends are acting like you are selfish for not having one.  If I anything it sounds like they are being selfish for putting their desire to go out and party over your wishes.  And they can always go out on their own.Smile
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  • SuMmErKuTiESuMmErKuTiE member
    2500 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Of course you don't have to have a bachelorette if you don't want one. All you have to do is politely decline an offer for a b-party if one of your BM's wants to throw one for you. Chances are out of 9 BM's someone will be planning something and when they come to you about it, just tell them you'd rather not have one, but thanks for the generous offer.
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