Let me tell you about my night.....I couldn't make this up!

brookerich · March 2012

So lets just start off by saying that the bullshiit flag has been raised and it is flapping in the wind!!

So I pull down the road we live on after work and I get to my driveway and just past my driveway stands a little boy (he was like 2) standing in the middle of the road in nothing but a diaper. He was filthy and sunburned. So I immediately get out of my car and rush into the road to get him and we both almost get hit. I look around to see if someone was maybe out walking a dog or something and had this kid with them and he'd just wandered farther than they were or something but no one was around. So I take him inside and dial 911. Poor thing's diaper hadn't been changed all day by the looks of it.

So the police come and put me thru the ringer like I asked for this poor kid to be dropped off in the middle of the road. Fast forward to 3 (!!) hours later. They finally locate this kids mother. BUT only after her neighbors called the police for something totally separate. Did I mention this woman lives 1/2 a mile away from me.

So by then DFACS was at her house. The kid is still at my house with the police and me, I've fed him, changed him and put a shirt on him and when they came to get the kid it was the DFACS officer and the mom and the mom just picks him up and walks off. No "thanks" or kiss my arse or anything. They gave this kid back to this parent who, while at home doing nothing (but drugs by the look of it) didn't happen to notice that her toddler was missing for 3 hours until the police were called for something else? Um, why? Shouldn't DFACS have immediately taken this baby into their custody?

So the police office said that DFACS chose not to write a report? WHAT? Why? Obviously this kid has no chance with a parent like this. I'm just sitting here in complete amazement. How could a report not be filed? I mean 3 hours. It wasn't like it was a 10 minute span where a kid opened a door and walked off. He was 1/2 a mile from his house, filthy and hugry and stayed there 3 hours with me before his mom was even located.

I'm a nervous wreck. I can't imagine what could happen to this kid now. The mother didn't even say anything when I told her that he was nearly hit by a car. She looked about 18 and strung out on something.

I'm so pissed right now. I feel like I put this kid back in a bad place because I did what I thought was right and called the police. I mean I know (obviously) I had no other choice but if something like this could happen then what else might heppen?

Anyways, just needed to share this. I still can't believe all this

crnflkgirl75 · March 2012

Holy shitballs! Seriously? Wtf is wrong with that state worker?! I'd call them tomorrow and complain, and find out why they didn't do anything.

brookerich · March 2012

oh I plan on being on the phone first thing in the morning. And I don't plan on shutting up until someone tells me something that makes sense. The mother was OBVIOUSLY on drugs. How in the hellll can you not notice that your 2 year old kid is missing for hours and hours, and obviously he was neglected long before that since his diaper was full and he was filthy. Not that little boys don't get filthy when playing outside in a normal day but you could tell it had been a minute since this kid had met soap.

I'm worring myself to death over this kid. We were both seriously about hit by a car today and they gave this kid back to this person who let all this happen?? wtf?!

crnflkgirl75 · March 2012

I've seen some horrible stuff, but your story is frightening on a whole different level. Usually, when I've seen this sort of thing, it led to the mom losing custody of the child, but this! Horrible to give the child back.

brookerich · March 2012

I've decided I'm just going to bypass the county I live in tomorrow morning and call the state directly. The county's lack of action disturbs me. Like really seriously disturbs me. I already tried calling the state but while there is a hotline to report things I need something bigger than that since its already been reported and basically ignored.

nda_roxybabe · March 2012

Holy crap. That is insane.

levanlaere · March 2012

Ugh, I feel so sorry for you! Even worse for that poor child... I would be tempted to go to the news with that story.

KimzyLynn · March 2012

I'm sorry you had to go through that! My mom was a foster parent and my youngest siblings are adopted, formerly our foster kids. I remember seeing the kids and babies just get handed back to their parents and it made me sick.

I do know that it takes a long time to get a child taken away (at least in WA), one of my siblings had reports with the state since they were a baby. Like, under a year. The reports make me cringe, and they still were not taken away by the state but given up by their parent.

I know it's hard but it sounds like the neighbors are noticing as well, I would definitely file a report/complaint with the state if nothing else to get the list of reports to help that child. It's so great that people like you care enough to stop and pick up a child, bathe and change it. It sounds like a no brainer but many people wouldn't do that.

By the way, I'm only using the terms like adopted/they/their for privacy, they're my brother and sister as much as my blood siblings are.

chelseamb11 · March 2012

Wow! That just blows me away! That kid is so lucky you found him before he was seriously hurt! I cannot believe that they let that mom take that kid. Wtf. And she didn't even thank you? If my kid was missing (and that young) for 5 minutes, you bet your ass the cops would be called and the entire neighborhood would be rallied to look for him. And it didn't even phase her. Wow.

celticmyss · March 2012

That is unbelievable.

elldee333 · March 2012

wow. I would definitely call everyone imaginable about this, and directly ask for supervisors. if you have a hard time, like a PP suggested, call the media! I am so sorry, I'd be a worried wreck as well.

please keep us posted!

lbarr088 · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_let-me-tell-you-about-my-nighti-couldnt-make-this-up?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:2b81793b-ac31-4920-a777-ea9d9d63206fPost:b2ea1042-43b5-4577-8e6b-79737e527c38">Re: Let me tell you about my night.....I couldn't make this up!</a>:
[QUOTE]Holy crap, that poor kid. Let us know what happens. Good lord.
Posted by jcbsjr[/QUOTE]

<div>Ditto.</div>

brookerich · March 2012

I just got off the phone with the states main DFACS number. I don't know if I got anywhere or not. I was on the phone for nearly 45 minutes. I explained what happened, the lack of concern or response from the local DFACS representative and expressed my concerns. I was transfered around, had to repeat my story several times.

The phone call ended with an assurance that the matter would be looked in to farther. I plan on calling every single day until I get some peace about this. I barely slept last night because I'm worried about this kid. I'm wondering if he has had anything to eat since yesterday when I fed him you know?

Hopefully DFACS will get their heads out of their asses and do something about this and soon. I don't want to be watching the news one day and find out this kid didn't make it.

I'll keep everyone updated. I still can't believe this has happened. Some people just shouldn't be allowed to have children. And how can the state agency charged with protecting kids and handling situations like this just turn their heads and act like nothing is going on? Blows my mind.

brookerich · March 2012

& @Kimz, I have two little cousins who are adopted foster children. They're still young (7 & 9) but the little boy was adopted when he was less than a year old, the little girl after a long battle when she was 6. I've saw kids come into my aunt's house with nothing but the clothes they have on. Its sad really. I've saw children taken away from dangerous situations that were a lot less dangerous than this one.

And yes, I think the neighbors might be watching. I still don't know what they actually called the police about yesterday, if they hadn't then that little boy might still be lost. The mom didn't say she didn't know where her kid was until the police were called for something totally separate. Then she tried to say that the kid was in the road in front of her house, when in fact he was 1/2 up the road in front of my house. I don't even pass her house coming in, its past my house. So whatever she did to have the cops called on her I'm thankful for I guess. In a way I'm not though, maybe if the mother was still a mystery this child would be with a foster parent who would take care of him instead of sent back with a mother who could obviously care less.

J&K10910 · March 2012

As much as it sucks, there is protocol and policies that those agencies have to follow. There could be a good reason for the way it was handled. You don't know the details. You don't know what happened after they left. And you can call and call all you want, but they actually shouldn't tell you anything. So you're not going to get the answers you want. I understand wanting to be heard and voicing your concerns and I think that's a good thing. But continuously calling is only going to take up the time of people who can only say so much to you about it. And what they can say is not likely to be at all satisfying.

Nindakay · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_let-me-tell-you-about-my-nighti-couldnt-make-this-up?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:2b81793b-ac31-4920-a777-ea9d9d63206fPost:741f3adb-1324-497b-a4a5-6415810e2df3">Re:Let me tell you about my night.....I couldn't make this up!</a>:
[QUOTE]As much as it sucks, there is protocol and policies that those agencies have to follow. There could be a good reason for the way it was handled. You don't know the details. You don't know what happened after they left. And you can call and call all you want, but they actually shouldn't tell you anything. So you're not going to get the answers you want. I understand wanting to be heard and voicing your concerns and I think that's a good thing. But continuously calling is only going to take up the time of people who can only say so much to you about it. And what they can say is not likely to be at all satisfying.
Posted by J&K10910[/QUOTE]

This, more or less. I TOTALLY understand your concern for this poor child. I would be horrified, and probably wouldn't have slept either!! But - you did your part, and then some. The authorities know, and that's what matters now. Try not to let it worry you, it's a situation that is out of your control.

But that poor kid....I do feel so badly for him!!

ceh789 · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_let-me-tell-you-about-my-nighti-couldnt-make-this-up?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:2b81793b-ac31-4920-a777-ea9d9d63206fPost:b1ae87c4-db30-47a1-8a60-39ac84c663ea">Re: Let me tell you about my night.....I couldn't make this up!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Let me tell you about my night.....I couldn't make this up! : I would do this, and<strong> I'd also contact the media</strong>. What you described is outrageous.
Posted by LucyHC[/QUOTE]
On things like this - the media is your friend. They'd be all over this and likely get more alarms ringing at CPS than you'll be able to.<div>
</div><div>I'd be so upset if I were you - but it was good of you to do what you could.</div>

skippylouwho · March 2012

Call your local newspaper and TV stations and report this to them, they may follow up on it. When I first started reading your post I thought you were in Columbus, we had a toddler wander away yesterday. The mother saw her child on the news and freaked, the babysitter had fallen asleep and the baby wandered out. YIKES.

Seriously - I'd call the mayor's office and file a complaint, I'd call the state and file a complaint, I'd report it to the local newspaper and TV stations. I'm like that though, I can't believe they just handed him back over. wow.

I had to do this once but it would take way to long to describe the situation and how it worked out. The media even called me later to tell it was worse than I knew and thanked me for telling them so they could bring it out in the open.

RailWayWife · March 2012

Wow, I cant believe nothing more was done... I hope the child gets the care he needs, the care his mother is obviously not providing.

blgrout · March 2012

Thank God you found him, I hate to think what could have been if you hadn't. That poor kid.

I definitely agree with PP about contacting the media. If family/social services in GA are anything like they are here in WA, the case workers are probably overloaded and they let stuff slide like you wouldn't believe (from my personal dealings with them), but it doesn't make it right. That poor kid is in a bad situation, and I hope that you can make a difference for him.

Keep us posted.

leahkate · March 2012

Definitely involve the media. The DHS departments around here operate on the good old boy system. They are mostly two bit paper pushers who could care less. And it's getting to where cops are the same way. Their perspective is: the baby was alive, mom was found, end of story. Let's go back to the office and sit on our asses.

LetsHikeToday · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_let-me-tell-you-about-my-nighti-couldnt-make-this-up?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:2b81793b-ac31-4920-a777-ea9d9d63206fPost:741f3adb-1324-497b-a4a5-6415810e2df3">Re:Let me tell you about my night.....I couldn't make this up!</a>:
[QUOTE]As much as it sucks, there is protocol and policies that those agencies have to follow. There could be a good reason for the way it was handled. You don't know the details. You don't know what happened after they left. And you can call and call all you want, but they actually shouldn't tell you anything. So you're not going to get the answers you want. I understand wanting to be heard and voicing your concerns and I think that's a good thing. But continuously calling is only going to take up the time of people who can only say so much to you about it. And what they can say is not likely to be at all satisfying.
Posted by J&K10910[/QUOTE]

This exactly. They won't be able to tell you anything. Maybe they did something after they left your house? You'll never know.

dasavvy1 · March 2012

You did the absolute right thing! Imagine how you'd feel if you didn't do what you did and he got hit right in front of your house? I can't imagine why they'd give him back to his mother as I'm sure this isn't the first time something like this has happened. I pray that SOMEBODY takes action on this child's behalf and soon.

brookerich · March 2012

Update, the DFACS office here where I lived called me this afternoon and told me that none of this was any of my business.

I thought "ok, well next time I find a toddler half naked and filthy in the middle of the road I won't worry about it then" What? It turned into my business when I found the kid in the middle of the road!!!

I contacted a reporter at the local paper so maybe she will do a follow up.

I guess technically it isn't any of my business but what if I don't speak up and something happens to this little boy? Someone has to stand up for him, he is 2 years old!

J&K10910 · March 2012

But it's NOT your business. You did what needed to be done, and now the rest is confidental. It's not your kid. It's not your family. You have absolutely no right or need to know any of the infornation. It's the law.

I don't know what you think the media will follow up on. YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT HAPPENED. You don't know what happened after they left your house. You don't know anything about it except you found the kid, called the police, and the police and some woman came, got the kid, and left. That's all you know.

J&K10910 · March 2012

Furthermore, by having the media poke around, honestly all you'll be doing is hindering them from doing their job. You know, their job to protect kids like this.

marriedfilingjointly · March 2012

I agree with J. You did the right thing but now you have to let them do their jobs. There are confidentiality rules and protocol, so no, you probably aren't entitled to a playbyplay so you can be assured that your idea of justice has been served.

LetsHikeToday · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_let-me-tell-you-about-my-nighti-couldnt-make-this-up?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:2b81793b-ac31-4920-a777-ea9d9d63206fPost:8262948a-a585-4679-98a1-4b5695adc885">Re: Let me tell you about my night.....I couldn't make this up!</a>:
[QUOTE]Update, the DFACS office here where I lived called me this afternoon and told me that none of this was any of my business. I thought "ok, well next time I find a toddler half naked and filthy in the middle of the road I won't worry about it then" What? It turned into my business when I found the kid in the middle of the road!!! I contacted a reporter at the local paper so maybe she will do a follow up. I guess technically it isn't any of my business but what if I don't speak up and something happens to this little boy? Someone has to stand up for him, he is 2 years old!
Posted by brookerich[/QUOTE]

The law makes it none of your business. And just because of that, doesn't mean you shouldn't care to help kids in the future.

I'm a teacher and numerous kids in my class have come in to school with black eyes and marks. We contact CPS and that's where my involvement ends. Does it kill me to see them hurt? Yes. But I'm also not a child welfare professional.

Let me tell you about my night.....I couldn't make this up!

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