Which ceremony time would you choose for a Friday wedding?!

eleventwentyfour · April 2011

Hi Ladies! So our wedding is on a Friday night and our current rental of the venue starts at 6pm, so our ceremony wouldn't begin until 6:30pm. However we have to option of paying a bit more and having the venue "all day" and we could choose to start the ceremony at any time. Regardless of which option we choose, our vendors and WP can arrive 2 hours early. Here is what were debating between:

Option 1 (current timeline):
Ceremony 6:30pm
Cocktail Hour ~7-8pm
Dinner/reception 8-12

I don't like to eat late, so to me starting dinner at 8 seems crazy!

Option 2:
Pay a little more and...
Ceremony 5:30
Cocktail hour ~6-7
Dinner/reception 7-12

or

Option 3:
Pay the same amount as option 2 and...
Ceremony 4:30
Cocktail hour ~5-6
Dinner/reception 6-12?

Which would you all prefer if it were your wedding or which would you rather be a guest at?

Melissa603 · April 2011

I am having a Friday night wedding and our Ceremony starts at 5:00. Our ceremony and reception are at the same venue (Aqua Turf) so once the ceremony is over, the guests can begin going over to the room and begin cocktail hour. Our reception will end at I believe 11:00 or 12:00

DrPB2b13 · April 2011

Hey date twin, we're likely going with option #3, though our reception will probably end around 10pm. I will add though that the majority of my guests will be coming from OOT so they'll be missing work to come to the wedding regardless of the start time.

I'd say if you think many or most of your guests will be coming straight from work or soon thereafter, go with a later start time. I've heard many people have guests only show up to the reception because they don't want to bother leaving early for a ceremony that starts at 5 or 5:30.

And finally, if you're willing to do first look photos and get the rest of your pictures done beforehand rather than try to get them done during the cocktail hour, you'll be able to enjoy your cocktail hour and hors d'eourves with your guests and the late dinner probably won't be such an issue for you

skybrie · April 2011

How much more? Percentage is fine

DrPB2b13 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_ceremony-time-would-choose-friday-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:8b70b2be-0808-475b-9bdf-d34ad43e5902Post:efca098a-de8e-4dd3-98db-d92e78d15c99">Re: Which ceremony time would you choose for a Friday wedding?!</a>:
[QUOTE]How much more? Percentage is fine
Posted by skybrie[/QUOTE]

Wow, I missed that it would cost more for you guys. I agree though, would you potentially have to cut other aspects to move it earlier, or is it relatively inexpensive?

SoSaysTara · April 2011

It really depends on your guests! Will the later start time be more convenient for your guests? Do you have some guests that could make it to the wedding (without taking off of work) if you have the 6:30 time? Do you have guests coming from distances of a few hours away?

MMRoberts11 · April 2011

We are also having a Friday wedding and will be starting at either 5:30 or 6:30pm so guests can do at least a half day at work if they want. I'm also still pondering but after the STDs go out I'll start talking to people about it (aunts, uncles, and other people I really want there that would have to work) and see what they prefer and go with the majority.

eleventwentyfour · April 2011

Family will mostly be from OOT. The majority of FI's family will likely be taking Friday off no matter which time we choose because they will be coming from out of state. My family will have to travel anywhere between 1-3 hours to get to the wedding. My guess is many of them will take the day off or take a half day regardless of start time. As for our friends, almost all will be less than 20 minutes away and most will have just graduated the prior Sunday... so hopefully they are giving themselves a week off before beginning their new jobs (fingers crossed everyone finds them!) and time won't be too much of a issue there. However, with all that said I don't want anyone to decline the invite because of a 1 or 2 hour difference.

As far as cost, it will raise our minimum to $15k. We were likely going to spend that much anyway (our venue is also our ceremony site and caterer so all of those costs plus staffing etc are factored into that minimum). It would also cost us an additional $1250 in rental time and staffing (which would be put towards our minimum as well). We likely wouldn't need to cut back anywhere else BUT I don't want to make my parents pay more than they need to. Worth it or no?

Thanks for all the input so far!!

lilmiss_34 · April 2011

Is there any way you could skip the cocktail hour and that way you could still have a later ceremony without having a crazy later dinner.

doeie04 · April 2011

I chose the later ceremony. People that live in town would probably still work if it were later. Plus, eating at 8 isn't really that late if you are busy. Just make sure you make time to snack before the wedding.

SSaltzman87 · April 2011

If a lot of your guests are OOT as it is, then it really isn't much of an issue. Otherwise- I would've said option 1 to give your guests time to get through any rush hour traffic and they wouldn't have to necessarily take time off work. I guess take a casual poll amongst family and friends?

sweetcanadian1979 · April 2011

These crazy 15K minimums and up floor me, my entire wedding won't cost that much and it will be extremely nice. My venue is only $400 and with linens and the meal will only be about $3k. I couldn't imagine but that seems to be normal in the US.

DrPB2b13 · April 2011

It really depends on where you are in the US. Here in New England and in the NYC area, it's super expensive. I believe it's similar on the west coast, and in select other places. It also depends on what you're looking for - I could easily have a wedding at a community center or VFW hall for only a couple hundred bucks, with pretty cheap catering if I wanted to. For the record I have absolutely nothing against a wedding like this and would happily attend one, however that doesn't really fit who we are and the experience we'd like to give our guests. And FI found and fell in love with our venue so we're going with it

sweetcanadian1979 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_ceremony-time-would-choose-friday-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:8b70b2be-0808-475b-9bdf-d34ad43e5902Post:b15e372a-f719-4426-8e33-68e2db757363">Re: Which ceremony time would you choose for a Friday wedding?!</a>:
[QUOTE]It really depends on where you are in the US. Here in New England and in the NYC area, it's super expensive. I believe it's similar on the west coast, and in select other places. It also depends on what you're looking for - I could easily have a wedding at a community center or VFW hall for only a couple hundred bucks, with pretty cheap catering if I wanted to. For the record I have absolutely nothing against a wedding like this and would happily attend one, however that doesn't really fit who we are and the experience we'd like to give our guests. <strong> And FI found and fell in love with our venue so we're going with it :)</strong>
Posted by DrPB2b13[/QUOTE]

You guys have an awesome venue :) in my area we DO NOT have those types of venues, we have 1 nice venue, the rest are ALL halls and the nice one isn't even that nice, very plain for the price. We have NOTHING :( but that is ok, with all the decorations, backdrops etc we know how to dress it up :)

Purple&7 · April 2011

I don't think 8 is too late for dinner. Since you're having cocktail hour your guest will have the chance to nibble on something before dinner starts.

PupKiss · April 2011

With all the hours of planning and all the $ that you are going to spend on this one day.. I think you should really consider doing one of the earier options. In my opinion time is a more valuable commodity that day. You might wish you had an extra hour to enjoy all that you worked for and the time with your guests. That might be worth the extra $1250. It's one more hour that you can wear your gorgeous gown

For me, I had the option of doing 6-11p or adding an extra hour (our extra hour was $800 plus additional minimum, but like you said I think we are hitting our minimum no problem.) So we are doing 5p-11p with an "after hours" party in the hotel bar until 12:30p or so.

Also think about if anything runs behind, say a family member isn't there right on time - or anything happens to delay the start of your ceremony.. you can't get that time back! Good luck with whatever you decide

CvilleClaire · April 2011

My Friday wedding can't start before 6 PM because the tasting room at our vineyard will be open until then. Happily, there's a secondary exit from the tasting building and my guests won't see those people leaving, but we don't want to overlapp. 6:30 PM is the time.

8 PM isn't all that late for dinner, IMO. To me, that's a perfect time for a Friday night dinner reservation.

The minimums are 12-15K here as well. Ugh.

skybrie · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_ceremony-time-would-choose-friday-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:8b70b2be-0808-475b-9bdf-d34ad43e5902Post:0cfe3df2-1a5c-482a-b541-eaa67c75933c">Re: Which ceremony time would you choose for a Friday wedding?!</a>:
[QUOTE]These crazy 15K minimums and up floor me, my entire wedding won't cost that much and it will be extremely nice. My venue is only $400 and with linens and the meal will only be about $3k. I couldn't imagine but that seems to be normal in the US.
Posted by sweetcanadian1979[/QUOTE]

WOW. I wish! In Chicago I talked to 18 vendors and only 4 had mins under 15k - which the highest being 40k!!!!

skybrie · April 2011

Whille I do not think dinner at 8 is too late (mine is 7:30) the time thing is a good point. do your guests like to dance? a later ceremony = less dancing time

kelsey+brandon · April 2011

Edit: I'm completely changing my answer since I actually read through all the posts.

I think if your guests will be from OOT, so they'll already be taking off work, then do what you want! Especially since you're okay with the increase in fees (and if your parents don't mind).

I would still say the same thing though about the wedding starting at 4:30 and the reception not ending until 12...it'd would just be a really long and exhausting day for everyone.

diamondx423 · April 2011

Our friday ceremony is at 4pm in our church and the cocktail hour starts at 7 putting dinner at 8. I think its perfectly normal to do. If we were getting married at the venue our ceremony would start at 6:30.

sweetcanadian1979 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_ceremony-time-would-choose-friday-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:8b70b2be-0808-475b-9bdf-d34ad43e5902Post:31b54bd4-8430-4aeb-a9a3-afa8f777e51f">Re: Which ceremony time would you choose for a Friday wedding?!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Which ceremony time would you choose for a Friday wedding?! : WOW. I wish! In Chicago I talked to 18 vendors and only 4 had mins under 15k - which the highest being 40k!!!!
Posted by skybrie[/QUOTE]

I just can't wrap my head around that sky, that is crazy lol. Canada can definately be cheaper in some ways but.......... when it comes to buying all the wedding stuff the us is def cheaper. I know in other parts of the country it can be much more expensive, but you get the best of the best for 15k

eleventwentyfour · April 2011

Thanks so much for all the advice, you girls are great!! I think we're definetly going to do a casual poll with the family.

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