My brother is stealing the show!!!

1stimer · June 2010

O.k. so I got ingaged may 28th and am so excited but just last night my little brother proposed to his long term girlfriend and I am sooooo happy for them. She is one of my bridesmaids I love her. But when I asked my brother when he was getting married he said spring of 2012. I am getting married fall of 2012. That means my family will be pooped out of wedding talk and parties by the time mine rolls around. Should I bump mine up a year and do 2011 or am i just paranoid? please help!

AdeleDazeem · June 2010

My older sister got engaged a few months after me and was married twelve months before me.

My fiance's older brother got engaged nearly a year after us and is getting married eight months before us.

My point: who cares? Our parents are thrilled that their kids are happy and want to celebrate our happiness.

Leave your plans and be happy for you brother. You can also watch and learn from their choices and mistakes. And you'll have some planning buddies! It will be *just* fine.

Midgie373 · June 2010

No big deal. There's a whole season between the two weddings. Honestly, it wouldn't matter if there was a week between the two.

aerinpegadrak · June 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_brother-stealing-show?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:a999a6c6-76ad-415b-b34f-523fe47f8e8fPost:7a39dffc-6603-4005-97b4-49d7ad4fa540">My brother is stealing the show!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]O.k. so I got ingaged may 28th and am so excited but just last night my little brother proposed to his long term girlfriend and I am sooooo happy for them. She is one of my bridesmaids I love her. But when I asked my brother when he was getting married he said spring of 2012. I am getting married fall of 2012. That means my family will be pooped out of wedding talk and parties by the time mine rolls around. Should I bump mine up a year and do 2011 or am i just paranoid? please help!
Posted by 1stimer[/QUOTE]
They get one day, you get one day. No one will be as excited about your wedding as you will, so if you're talking everyone's ear off about it, they're going to get burned out regardless of who else is getting married.

trix1223 · June 2010

My niece and my DD were married exactly 6 weeks apart. And exactly 3 weeks between each wedding my mom died. So my family was together for 3 major emotional events in a span of 6 weeks.

And guess what? It was fine. Our family was just as excited about DD's wedding, a mere 6 weeks after niece's wedding. There wasn't any competition between the two cousins, and their aunts, uncles, grandparents, and cousins all completely enjoyed each wedding.

Frankly, you sound childish and petulant~not a good sound for someone old enough to get married.

Your wedding isn't a "show" that can be stolen. It's the commitment of two consenting adults: the operative word being adults.

gottahavashorti · June 2010

You're just paranoid. And better 6 months apart than 6 weeks if there are any family members traveling a large distance.

nda_roxybabe · June 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_brother-stealing-show?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:a999a6c6-76ad-415b-b34f-523fe47f8e8fPost:7a39dffc-6603-4005-97b4-49d7ad4fa540">My brother is stealing the show!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]O.k. so I got ingaged may 28th and am so excited but just last night my little brother proposed to his long term girlfriend and I am sooooo happy for them. She is one of my bridesmaids I love her. But when I asked my brother when he was getting married he said spring of 2012. I am getting married fall of 2012. That means my family will be pooped out of wedding talk and parties by the time mine rolls around. Should I bump mine up a year and do 2011 or am i just paranoid? please help!
Posted by 1stimer[/QUOTE]
Um...ENgaged.
So the weddings will be like 6 months apart? BFD.

You're beyond paranoid

GreenPepperBurger · June 2010

First of all, you get ENgaged, not INgaged. And if you were really happy for them, you wouldn't be bitching and moaning that they are getting married before you. Everyone will be happy for you. Relax. Are you this self-centered about everything else?

barbbhoww · June 2010

Thank you roxy and green....

Srbageldog · June 2010

Why is everyone being so nasty to her? She asked a freaking question. If you want to answer it, fine, but you don't have to insult her and call her names. Does it really make you people feel good about yourselves to insult people on here? Frankly, insulting people on web forums is immature and childish, and I wonder if YOU are old enough to get married.

For the original poster: I had a similar situation. Myyounger brother got engaged to his long term girlfriend and within a month my boyfriend proposed to me. My brother got married within 6 months, and my boyfriend and I still haven't tied the knot yet. My parents made a big deal over the fact that we didn't get married around the same time as my brother.

If it bothers you that your baby brother is going to be married before you, then by all means change your wedding date to 2011. Although your brother may feel that you are trying to one-up him. If it's not that big a deal, keep the date you have planned. In the long run it won't matter who got married first. Just enjoy the fact that you are both getting married.

tidetravel · June 2010

Just make sure you get knocked up before FSIL.

Umbilical cords = finish lines, or didn't you know that?

JeFlanigan · June 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_brother-stealing-show?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:a999a6c6-76ad-415b-b34f-523fe47f8e8fPost:5b000dd3-904f-4014-8566-95aa59f3ba6a">Re: My brother is stealing the show!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]Just make sure you get knocked up before FSIL. Umbilical cords = finish lines, or didn't you know that?
Posted by tidetravel[/QUOTE]

LOL for some reason I'm seeing bride wars in my head. <shutters /> what and awful movie.

megk8oz · June 2010

Yes, you're paranoid. And if you really need to move your wedding up just so you can get married before him, that's incredibly insecure of you. Who really cares who is older/younger/dating longer?

You set a date that works for you and your FI, he sets a date that's good for him and his FI. It's really no big deal that these days happen to fall in the same year.

nda_roxybabe · June 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_brother-stealing-show?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:a999a6c6-76ad-415b-b34f-523fe47f8e8fPost:55c3ecb7-04c7-4df9-8192-4a077f67151c">Re: My brother is stealing the show!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]Why is everyone being so nasty to her? She asked a freaking question. If you want to answer it, fine, but you don't have to insult her and call her names. Does it really make you people feel good about yourselves to insult people on here? Frankly, insulting people on web forums is immature and childish, and I wonder if YOU are old enough to get married. For the original poster: I had a similar situation. Myyounger brother got engaged to his long term girlfriend and within a month my boyfriend proposed to me. My brother got married within 6 months, and my boyfriend and I still haven't tied the knot yet. My parents made a big deal over the fact that we didn't get married around the same time as my brother. If it bothers you that your baby brother is going to be married before you, then by all means change your wedding date to 2011. Although your brother may feel that you are trying to one-up him. If it's not that big a deal, keep the date you have planned. In the long run it won't matter who got married first. Just enjoy the fact that you are both getting married.
Posted by Srbageldog[/QUOTE]
Telling other people how to respond when she asked for opinions is silly.

emarston1 · June 2010

My best friend got engaged not even a week after I did and will be married before me. Am I upset? Not at all. In fact, I am ecstatic for her and can't wait to be MOH at her wedding.

It is bad form to make THEIR good news about you. Because it's not about you. They have made the decision to spend the rest of their lives together (just like you and your FI) so you should be happy for them. Also, as long as you don't talk about weddings 24/7, your family shouldn't be burnt out on wedding talk. Keep it to a minimum and you'll be fine.

Also, to the poster that said the girls were being nasty, that is just not true. They were being honest and blunt, but not nasty.

pixiedust84 · June 2010

I fail to see the problem. Your brother is marrying a girl you love. That is GREAT news.

FWIW my brother just got engaged a week ago (YAY!) They haven't set a date yet but they could set it the day before mine and I would still be thrilled. I love his fiance and am so glad they are happy!

Also your wedding is realllly far away. Your brother probably didn't want to wait that long for his. I wouldn't either. Long engagements work for some people and some people want to be married sooner.

GreenPepperBurger · June 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_brother-stealing-show?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:a999a6c6-76ad-415b-b34f-523fe47f8e8fPost:55c3ecb7-04c7-4df9-8192-4a077f67151c">Re: My brother is stealing the show!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]Why is everyone being so nasty to her? She asked a freaking question. If you want to answer it, fine, but you don't have to insult her and call her names. Does it really make you people feel good about yourselves to insult people on here? Frankly, insulting people on web forums is immature and childish, and I wonder if YOU are old enough to get married. For the original poster: I had a similar situation. Myyounger brother got engaged to his long term girlfriend and within a month my boyfriend proposed to me. My brother got married within 6 months, and my boyfriend and I still haven't tied the knot yet. My parents made a big deal over the fact that we didn't get married around the same time as my brother. If it bothers you that your baby brother is going to be married before you, then by all means change your wedding date to 2011. Although your brother may feel that you are trying to one-up him. If it's not that big a deal, keep the date you have planned. In the long run it won't matter who got married first. Just enjoy the fact that you are both getting married.
Posted by Srbageldog[/QUOTE]

We're all just bitter hags. Also, calling people immature and childish is insulting. You, therefore, are a hypocrite.

APW2010 · June 2010

Spring to fall is more than enough separation between your events for everyone to recover and get back into major wedding mode again. Plus, you can learn tons from your FSIL's experience - watch what worked for her and what didn't, what took lots more time or money than expected, what ideas she dismissed that you loved and can use for yourself, what relatives gave horrible advice you can avoid, what things weren't accounted for, and so on. This can be a huge advantage to you to see someone else go through the whole planning

I'd say jump on board and help her out, bond over the experience, and learn lots in the process.

Simply Fated · June 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_brother-stealing-show?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:a999a6c6-76ad-415b-b34f-523fe47f8e8fPost:7a39dffc-6603-4005-97b4-49d7ad4fa540">My brother is stealing the show!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]O.k. so I got ingaged may 28th and am so excited but just last night my little brother proposed to his long term girlfriend and I am sooooo happy for them. She is one of my bridesmaids I love her. But when I asked my brother when he was getting married he said spring of 2012. I am getting married fall of 2012. That means my family will be pooped out of wedding talk and parties by the time mine rolls around. Should I bump mine up a year and do 2011 or am i just paranoid? please help!
Posted by 1stimer[/QUOTE]

Do you think your family will make those kinds of comments to you, like, "Ugh, weren't we just AT a bridal shower?" or "I don't feel like flying all the way back for another wedding!"

6 months is a good space inbetween weddings... you might be ok!

stinkerbell6879 · June 2010

My cousin and I got married 2 months apart. Everyone who were invited to both were fine. If you have a lot of the same OOT guest, then yes, you could have people who can only make one. But....that can happen no matter when you plan it.

sam416 · June 2010

You're not being paranoid. You're being ridiculous. A lot goes into picking a date- so I'm sure they have their reasons, none of which probably include "must get married first!". Can you imagine peoples' reactions if you moved your date up just so you could get married before your brother?

As others have said, both events will be just as special and just as unique. Continue to be happy for your brother. Stop trying to be the center of attention before everyone gets sick of it, and it won't take long.

Who knows... maybe he planned on proposing before you're FI and he waited a month so you would have time to enjoy your engagement. How much time does one need for their show?

That being said, maybe since it's so fresh, you'll come around and realize that there are more important things in the wedding experience and in life.

1stimer · June 2010

to all thanks for some.... well thanks but no thanks. problem is My brother is my best man her my bridesmaid, and I'm the wedding planner for BOTH weddings. Just was worried it might be a little much for me and my family. I figured if I bumped mine up, it wouldn't be so stressfull. Thanks to some that were being kind. I never ranted or raved, I think some of you took the main post title to the extreme. think before you act. please and thank you to all the other kind brides. good luck. I think i will stick to asking frinds this bloging thing can be brutal with bridzillas lurking.

Srbageldog · June 2010

Have you discussed this issue with your brother at all? You might also take into consideration that even if you up the date of your wedding to Fall 2011, that is still only a 6 month gap between your wedding and his. Definitely get your friends and family's opinions. Also, how does your fiance feel about changing the wedding date? Is he cool with that?
Good luck to you, and your brother!

1stimer · June 2010

srbageldog, yeah i did talk to him. we are trying to come to an agreement cause I would love to plan his wedding but I think it might be allot for me. He is going to keep his original date and I will work around it some how. I need a year in between was just shocked and I think he forgot about the timeframe. I guess a joke turned into allot. I was gonna put he stole my thunder a little joke we have bettween us but I didn't think others would get that. I don't think they got this either. also we do have allot of family from out of state and they are using there vacation time to attend like our mother. so we have to either have it in the same week (impossible) or a year apart. it will work out just need a good prayer. lol

tidetravel · June 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_brother-stealing-show?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:a999a6c6-76ad-415b-b34f-523fe47f8e8fPost:8998d275-2a7a-4aef-93e3-76d7f0ea3663">Re: My brother is stealing the show!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]to all thanks for some.... well thanks but no thanks. problem is My brother is my best man her my bridesmaid, and I'm the wedding planner for BOTH weddings. Just was worried it might be a little much for me and my family. I figured if I bumped mine up, it wouldn't be so stressfull. Thanks to some that were being kind. I never ranted or raved, I think some of you took the main post title to the extreme. think before you act. please and thank you to all the other kind brides. good luck. I think i will stick to asking frinds this bloging thing can be brutal with bridzillas lurking.
Posted by 1stimer[/QUOTE]

Why are you planning your brother's wedding? That's his job. You have enough on your plate.

tidetravel · June 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_brother-stealing-show?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:a999a6c6-76ad-415b-b34f-523fe47f8e8fPost:b95e4da1-66ba-4d92-9c63-269f9f0baf18">Re: My brother is stealing the show!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]srbageldog, yeah i did talk to him. we are trying to come to an agreement cause I would love to plan his wedding but I think it might be allot for me. He is going to keep his original date and I will work around it some how. I need a year in between was just shocked and I think he forgot about the timeframe. I guess a joke turned into allot. I was gonna put he stole my thunder a little joke we have bettween us but I didn't think others would get that. I don't think they got this either. also we do have allot of family from out of state and they are using there vacation time to attend like our mother. so we have to either have it in the same week (impossible) or a year apart. it will work out just need a good prayer. lol
Posted by 1stimer[/QUOTE]
How exactly were we supposed to know that you were "joking." We can only go based off of what you type. Also, the details that you just mentioned here - about your guests being OOT and the fact that you're planning your brother's wedding (weird) should have been mentioned in the OP.

And- it's a lot, not allot.

tidetravel · June 2010

Srbageldog - YGPM.

stinkerbell6879 · June 2010

Yeah...I think that trying to help them plan would be stretching yourself thin. Also like I said YES it will not be easy on OOT guest....but they will make it work and if they can't do both within 6 months then they can't. I know it's hard when you want everyone there....but no matter what you do....things can happen and you need to just do your best to understand that.

OpalineTowers · June 2010

Srbageldog: Don't you know that this is how the women on this board conduct themselves? They think they're witty.

nda_roxybabe · June 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_brother-stealing-show?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:a999a6c6-76ad-415b-b34f-523fe47f8e8fPost:8998d275-2a7a-4aef-93e3-76d7f0ea3663">Re: My brother is stealing the show!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]to all thanks for some.... well thanks but no thanks. problem is My brother is my best man her my bridesmaid, and I'm the wedding planner for BOTH weddings. Just was worried it might be a little much for me and my family. I figured if I bumped mine up, it wouldn't be so stressfull. Thanks to some that were being kind. I never ranted or raved, I think some of you took the main post title to the extreme. think before you act. please and thank you to all the other kind brides. good luck. I think i will stick to asking frinds this bloging thing can be brutal with bridzillas lurking.
Posted by 1stimer[/QUOTE]
The only bridEzilla I see is you. You asked for opinions did you not?

nda_roxybabe · June 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_brother-stealing-show?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:a999a6c6-76ad-415b-b34f-523fe47f8e8fPost:d8571061-68bb-4f0c-a3dc-480ba5ec72c2">Re: My brother is stealing the show!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]Srbageldog: Don't you know that this is how the women on this board conduct themselves? They think they're witty.
Posted by OpalineTowers[/QUOTE]
You again.

My brother is stealing the show!!!

Re: My brother is stealing the show!!!

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