Invitation Wording Drama ...

aholko2013 · January 2013

Please help! My fiance and I were almost ready to approve the final proof of our invitations when drama broke out ...

My Dad is very traditional, and very emotional about "giving me away". He feels very strongly that it is his responsibility as the father of the bride to HOST the wedding. Unfortuantely, the budget he gave us will not cover the entire reception ... which is so understandable, he has given me so much and I don't expect him to pay a dime, what he offered is amazing!

My fiance's parents have offered to pay for the alcohol at the reception, this is another awesome gesture. However, it has created wedding invitation drama.

How do we show that my parents are the "hosts" of the wedding while still honoring this parents contributions?

My fiance doens't think having this parents name on the invitation after "son of" is enough of an honor, but my dad will be very hurt if we group them together as if they are both hosting

HELP!!

SmallenForever · January 2013

We said "the families of" then our names. Worked well for us.

Jager1219 · January 2013

Ouch - looks like you're in a pickle. "Son of" would have been my only suggestion. I would talk to them.

Jen4948 · January 2013

Well, the invitations are not supposed to reflect the financial arrangements, because they're none of the guests' business. Paying =/= hosting. Being listed on the invitation is not an "honor" that you buy with financial contributions.

You can use "son of/Groom's parents" after his name on your invitation, or just "Together with their families/parents" with your names only.

I'd tell your father that it's not fair to your FILs for him to insist on being the sole "host" on the invitation. He may still dig his heels in though. Maybe you can find something else to compromise on if you need to.

OliveOilsMom · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:9fc5fccd-d4e8-456a-b866-eaa4279c7bee">Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]Please help! My fiance and I were almost ready to approve the final proof of our invitations when drama broke out ... My Dad is very traditional, and very emotional about "giving me away". He feels very strongly that it is his responsibility as the father of the bride to HOST the wedding. Unfortuantely, the budget he gave us will not cover the entire reception ... which is so understandable, he has given me so much and I don't expect him to pay a dime, what he offered is amazing! My fiance's parents have offered to pay for the alcohol at the reception, this is another awesome gesture. However, it has created wedding invitation drama. How do we show that my parents are the "hosts" of the wedding while still honoring this parents contributions?<strong> My fiance doens't think having this parents name on the invitation after "son of" is enough of an honor, but my dad will be very hurt if we group them together as if they are both hosting HELP!!
</strong>Posted by aholko2013[/QUOTE]

Both parents are contributing to your wedding. It is appropriate to use "Together with their parents" as the wording. If your dad is upset, just explain that FILs are also contributing to the wedding and it was important to you and FI to let both parents host due to contributions from both sides. Is your dad escorting you down the aisle, because that is where he gets to "give you away", by the time the reception starts, you are a married lady!

Pookieson · January 2013

Personally, I think they are both hosting. I understand the name dilemma, my families want their names listed as well, thank goodness no one cares what goes where on the invite. I prefer the bride and groom with their families wording, but it was out for me too. You really only have a couple of options. You can do this:

Mr. Father and Mother of Bride
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter
your name
to
your groom
son of
Mr. and Mrs. Father and Mother of Groom

OR

Mr. and Mrs.Father and Mother of the Bride
and
Mr. and Mrs. Father and Mother of the Groom
request the pleasure of your company at
the marriage of their children

We were also hosting (he also has divorced parents) so our invitation is ridiculously wordy, but hey, it's what the fam wanted, and I don't care enough to fight them on an invitation (who really remembers the invite....really???)

Bride
and
Groom
together with their parents
Father and Mother of bride
and
Father and Mother of groom
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of their children
etc etc blah blah

I don't know how else you are going to get around that. I think "son of" is enough of an honor, but if your FI doesn't like it, work with something else. Maybe express to your father that marriage is the joining of families and he should be honored that FI family wants to contribute. Good luck. All in all, it's an invitation, it's going to sit on someone's refrigerator until the big day and then get tossed, you'll keep a copy probably, but none of your guests will. That is my opinion.

*Edit for spelling, I always forget to do that!

aholko2013 · January 2013

All Good Comments! I'm advocating for having his parents be on the invitations as "son of ...." We'll see if i win that one.

My dad is stubborn old Irish man who feels so strongly about his responsibility to host. Honestly, he wishes he could afford the whole thing .... I think hes being ridiculous but he's not going to change now.

I just need to find away to make sure he feels like he is still the "host"

Maggie0829 · January 2013

Since both are contributing to the reception then in reality both are hosting. Just becasue one set of parents pay more then the others does not mean that they get the "hosting" rights.

I would go with either "Together with their parents".

Let your Dad know that both contributions, no matter the size, are very important to both you and your FI and they should be honored equally. And that it follows correct etiquette.

Jen4948 · January 2013

If your father is acting as a "point person" of the wedding, then he's a host.

I'd let him know that he's a host no matter how the invitation is worded or who is contributing what.

Maggie0829 · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:07ca791d-035b-41ca-ba88-db98ecde8edf">Re: Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]All Good Comments! I'm advocating for having his parents be on the invitations as "son of ...." We'll see if i win that one. My dad is stubborn old Irish man who feels so strongly about his responsibility to host. Honestly, he wishes he could afford the whole thing .... I think hes being ridiculous but he's not going to change now.<strong> I just need to find away to make sure he feels like he is still the "host"
</strong>Posted by aholko2013[/QUOTE]

If you feel comfortable doing this and if your Dad is up for it, you can have all the RSVPs be sent to his address and he can then keep track of who is coming and who has declined. This could possibly make him feel like the "host".

Jen4948 · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:bad7dabc-45aa-47ac-9654-6d13405a60ba">Re: Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]I answered your question on the Invitations board. Please put X-post at the top when you post the same question in two places. Your father is correct in that he and your Mom are hosting your wedding. Your FILS are paying for your bar bill at the reception, but that does NOT mean that they are hosting your wedding. It is a lovely gift, and you should thank them publicly at the reception with a special toast. That is an honor! IT IS NOT AN HONOR TO BE ON THE INVITATION!!!<strong> I do not like the "son of" thing. It is very new. In the past, only Jewish weddings had both sets of parents on the invitation, since this is a Jewish tradition. When I see "son of" on an invitation, it tells me that somebody doesn't understand wedding traditions or etiquette.</strong> Yes, you can do it if you must, to keep the peace. This is my recommended wording: Mr. and Mrs. John Bridesparents request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of their daughter Bride's first middle to Mr. Groom's Full Name Date time Venue Address City, State Mr. and Mrs. John Bridesparents Mr. and Mrs. George Groomsparents request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of Bride's Full Name and Groom's Full Name (etc.)
Posted by CMGr[/QUOTE]

That it's a Jewish thing doesn't make it a bad thing. To suggest this is to really insult people who are Jewish. If that's not what you're suggesting, please clarify.

Unfortunately, some parents and others get so hurt by invitation wording, traditional or no, that couples consider it not a hill to die on and just cram all the names of all the parents in.

Jen4948 · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:6788bed0-aea3-4268-80e3-8aeec2e2a021">Re: Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]Half the guests at my wedding were Jewish. It is their tradition, not mine. Why would this be negative? I've done the hora at many a Jewish wedding. (I think they thought my Methodist ceremony and reception was really boring!) I agree with you about everything else!
Posted by CMGr[/QUOTE]

Unfortunately, your post seemed to equate "Jewish" with "wrong" simply because it isn't your tradition. That it isn't your tradition doesn't make it wrong.

Jen4948 · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:1e6f054d-15ef-47f7-afa9-344a2b3a4fe1">Re: Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]No it isn't wrong, but it isn't traditional, either!. I am a traditional person, and I prefer following the bride and groom's own traditions. I'm fine with the money dance if they are Polish, too. I wouldn't do it at one of my family weddings. If anybody tries to put "son of" on my son's wedding invitation someday, I'll be upset about it. It is NOT an honor. I have had a lot of people try to tell me that the "son of" is an old tradition. It isn't, unless you are Jewish. Simply that. Sorry if I offended anyone, but if you are trying to read anti-semitism into any of my posts, you are barking up the wrong tree.
Posted by CMGr[/QUOTE]

Gee, I'd never have thought it's a hill to die on regardless of what tradition who comes from-not to mention that it comes off as sexist, regardless of how "traditional" it is. It also used to be "traditional" that couples living together but not married or engaged were not social units. Not everything "traditional" is good.

Is the world really going to come to an end because someone not Jewish listed the groom as "son of" his parents on a wedding invitation?

AddieCake · January 2013

I am always a fan of "Together with their families."

Jen4948 · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:ba11ffc6-ae44-42bb-be93-ac41a7d5a05e">Re: Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]I am always a fan of "Together with their families."
Posted by AddieL73[/QUOTE]

I like this too.

aholko2013 · January 2013

wow. Didn't mean to create such a passionate discussion! Just wondering if there is another option for the invitation wording. It appears there is not ... we'll go with "son of ..." thanks for all the input!

MobKaz · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:9fc5fccd-d4e8-456a-b866-eaa4279c7bee">Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]Please help! My fiance and I were almost ready to approve the final proof of our invitations when drama broke out ... My Dad is very traditional, and very emotional about "giving me away". He feels very strongly that it is his responsibility as the father of the bride to HOST the wedding. Unfortuantely, the budget he gave us will not cover the entire reception ... which is so understandable, he has given me so much and I don't expect him to pay a dime, what he offered is amazing! My fiance's parents have offered to pay for the alcohol at the reception, this is another awesome gesture. However, it has created wedding invitation drama. How do we show that my parents are the "hosts" of the wedding while still honoring this parents contributions? My fiance doens't think having this parents name on the invitation after "son of" is enough of an honor, but my dad will be very hurt if we group them together as if they are both hosting HELP!!
Posted by aholko2013[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>Invitation decision aside, there is an additional way your father can show his pride as the host of the wedding, and as father of the bride. Not always, but typically, the host (and for the sake of tradition, the father of the bride), makes the first speech of the evening. He welcomes and thanks his guests for their support/attendance/love.....and offers the first congratulatory toast to the bride and groom. Perhaps reminding him of this honor may offset whatever printing decision you make.</div>

MobKaz · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:0402a91f-0f06-46e8-8153-c53dfb277aff">Re: Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Invitation Wording Drama ... : Didn't I say that?
Posted by CMGr[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div><strong><em><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:12px;background-color:#ffffff;">Your father is correct in that he and your Mom are hosting your wedding.</span>
<span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:12px;background-color:#ffffff;">Your FILS are paying for your bar bill at the reception, but that does NOT mean that they are hosting your wedding. It is a lovely gift, and you should thank them publicly at the reception with a special toast. That is an honor!</span>
<span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:12px;background-color:#ffffff;">IT IS NOT AN HONOR TO BE ON THE INVITATION!!!</span></em></strong></div><div><strong><em><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:12px;background-color:#ffffff;">
</span></em></strong></div><div><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:12px;background-color:#ffffff;">You said that <u>the bride</u> should acknowledge her<u> in-laws</u> at the reception with a special toast of thanks. My response offered a suggestion as to how the <u>father of the bride</u> could reiterate his role as host.</span></div><div><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:12px;background-color:#ffffff;">
</span></div><div><font face="Arial"><span style="font-size:12px;">And, your response frankly confuses me. Had my response been similar/the same as yours, it clearly would not be the first time multiple posters would repeat the same point on one thread.</span></font></div>

Pookieson · January 2013

I don't like "son of" but I don't think there is anything wrong with having both sets of parents (obviously, I'm doing it). I'm not a traditional bride per se, but that's my opinion. I think both sets of parents are fine. What if the grooms parents were solely hosting??? It's a modern age, with a lot of different family dynamics, traditions, etc. To state that someone who includes the grooms parents on an invite do not understand etiquette is kind of pompous. Traditions change. Etiquette changes.

RWolff · January 2013

We are using "son of" on ours. I am Jewish, FI is not, but we are very much about the Jewish tradition of a joining of families, not simply of two people. There are several other small ways we are doing this in the wedding itself, so it felt wrong not to have the invitations reflect this as well.

hollycs · January 2013

Wow.

"Half the guests at my wedding were Jewish. (I was working in the jewelry/diamond business.)"

I'M JUST LOADED UP IN DIAMONDS! HEY LOOK, I'M AN ATTORNEY! I DON'T DO WELL AT SPORTS! BECAUSE I'M JEWISH AND THE LADY THAT IS SO OBSESSIVE SHE POSTS ON WEDDING BOARDS WHEN SHE HASN'T HAD A WEDDING IN DECADES!

allychase · January 2013

My in laws are the only ones contributing, my parents can't afford to offer a dime and we still did Together with their parents, cause were paying the bulk and I'm personally not a fan of the invitation worded from the standpoint of the brides parents. Not saying its wrong just not my style.

libby2483 · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:1be07a11-630e-4a32-a279-529e62e9ecc1">Re: Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]Wow. "Half the guests at my wedding were Jewish. (I was working in the jewelry/diamond business.)" I'M JUST LOADED UP IN DIAMONDS! HEY LOOK, I'M AN ATTORNEY! I DON'T DO WELL AT SPORTS! BECAUSE I'M JEWISH AND THE LADY THAT IS SO OBSESSIVE SHE POSTS ON WEDDING BOARDS WHEN SHE HASN'T HAD A WEDDING IN DECADES!
Posted by hollycs[/QUOTE]

<div>Perhaps I'm missing some sarcasm, but I am completely confused as to what you are talking about. CMGr was not being offensive in any way. Also, this website is for brides, married women, parents of brides, bridesmaids, and really anyone else who feels like using it. </div><div>
</div><div>Edit: Nor is CMGr Jewish, so I'm just totally lost.</div>

Jen4948 · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:981d9acc-1b9e-4245-b0ff-94b13ab749e2">Re: Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Invitation Wording Drama ... : Perhaps I'm missing some sarcasm, but I am completely confused as to what you are talking about. CMGr was not being offensive in any way. Also, this website is for brides, married women, parents of brides, bridesmaids, and really anyone else who feels like using it. Edit: Nor is CMGr Jewish, so I'm just totally lost.
Posted by libby2483[/QUOTE]

Actually, this thread is cross-posted in Invites and Paper, where CMGr claims she would be "horrified" to find "son of" on an invitation....like there aren't more important things to be "horrified" over. This kind of overstatement comes off as snobbish and frivolous. She also claims not to be anti-Semitic, but based on what she's posted in both threads, that's not how she sounds.

libby2483 · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:04f2c7fd-d141-4bc9-ba51-57204bc2e825">Re: Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Invitation Wording Drama ... : Actually, CMGr was being offensive about other people's backgrounds.
Posted by Jen4948[/QUOTE]

<div>Perhaps I missed it, but I didn't read anything in CMGr's posts that I thought was offensive. She did mention how including "son of" was a Jewish tradition, and until recently, was not done by people who were not Jewish. However, simply stating that a tradition is from another culture, and isn't traditionally done by people outside that culture, is in no way offensive. It is simply explaining what is traditional in one culture and what is not, and is making no judgment on which tradition is preferable. What did she say that was offensive?</div>

Jen4948 · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:391414ad-45aa-44df-9ade-fc7e4ad33a92">Re: Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Invitation Wording Drama ... : Perhaps I missed it, but I didn't read anything in CMGr's posts that I thought was offensive. She did mention how including "son of" was a Jewish tradition, and until recently, was not done by people who were not Jewish. However, simply stating that a tradition is from another culture, and isn't traditionally done by people outside that culture, is in no way offensive. It is simply explaining what is traditional in one culture and what is not, and is making no judgment on which tradition is preferable. What did she say that was offensive?
Posted by libby2483[/QUOTE]

Check out the thread in the other folder, where she claims she would be "horrified" if "son of" appeared on her son's wedding invitation.

libby2483 · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:04f2c7fd-d141-4bc9-ba51-57204bc2e825">Re: Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Invitation Wording Drama ... : Actually, this thread is cross-posted in Invites and Paper, where CMGr claims she would be "horrified" to find "son of" on an invitation....like there aren't more important things to be "horrified" over. This kind of overstatement comes off as snobbish and frivolous. She also claims not to be anti-Semitic, but based on what she's posted in both threads, that's not how she sounds.
Posted by Jen4948[/QUOTE]

<div>I certainly wouldn't be upset if someone used "son of" on invitations. In fact, I used it on mine. However, CMGr is someone who adheres closely to traditional etiquette, so she has the right to feel upset about it if she wants. Different people feel strongly about different aspects of etiquette. I still don't see anything anti-semetic, though.</div>

Jen4948 · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:db5be664-2061-4211-a8db-4693f0979220">Re: Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Invitation Wording Drama ... : I certainly wouldn't be upset if someone used "son of" on invitations. In fact, I used it on mine. However, CMGr is someone who adheres closely to traditional etiquette, so she has the right to feel upset about it if she wants. Different people feel strongly about different aspects of etiquette. I still don't see anything anti-semetic, though.
Posted by libby2483[/QUOTE]

I think she made too big an issue of whether or not it's a Jewish tradition...and it is neither an exclusively Jewish tradition, nor do even Jews always use "son of." I'm Jewish and when my cousin, also Jewish, was married a few years ago, they just used "The familes of Bride and Groom" etc.

libby2483 · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:61ee147d-aea3-4201-b08a-2326ff2a091c">Re: Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Invitation Wording Drama ... : I think she made too big an issue of whether or not it's a Jewish tradition...and it is neither an exclusively Jewish tradition, nor do even Jews always use "son of." I'm Jewish and when my cousin, also Jewish, was married a few years ago, they just used "The familes of Bride and Groom" etc.
Posted by Jen4948[/QUOTE]

<div>I didn't interpret her saying it was from a certain culture as offensive. I actually wasn't aware it was a Jewish tradition, and I used it on my invitations. I'm glad to hear your perspective as someone who has seen it done both ways in both Jewish and non-Jewish culture. It seems like one of those traditions that is changing, and I agree that most people wouldn't find it offensive if included.</div>

Jen4948 · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:7bb87d50-a705-43a3-8a0d-f12e77f0e3d0">Re: Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]Well, why not? It isn't a part of my tradition. I dislike the "son of" thing on non-Jewish invitations, and I've said so many times. It draws attention to people who should not be on the invitation in the first place. I think you are making way to much of this. In my tradition, the bride's family normally hosts the wedding. The groom's family normally hosts the rehearsal dinner. This certainly does not always happen, and many times the couple hosts their own wedding, or the groom's family steps forward and hosts the wedding. That is not happening in this case, though. The groom's family does not belong on the invitation unless they are hosting. I've never said anything else. No way would I enforce my traditions on another culture. Nor would I expect another culture to insist that my own culture was wrong for me. I think you ladies need to chill.
Posted by CMGr[/QUOTE]

But you are trying to push your tradition on other people and claiming that it is wrong if it isn't Jewish, which isn't the case. You don't have to be Jewish to use "son of," nor do all Jews use it. I'm Jewish, and my parents didn't use it on theirs when they were married. Equating the two is incorrect and inappropriate.

And when all is said and done, this particular tradition has become rather outdated and sexist. Couples sometimes host their own weddings. Grooms' parents host or co-host weddings. And there are times when "son of" is just necessary to establish the identity of the groom. Not to use it sometimes doesn't reflect reality.

Not only that, traditions do change. It was once traditional not to consider unmarried but living together or same-sex couples as social units, for example. Invitation wording traditions can change too. It is not necessary for them to be issued solely by the bride's parents or to have no mention of the groom's...whatever tradition one comes from. The important thing is that they convey who, what, when, and where to the guests...not whether or not it lists "son of" or is "traditional."

Jen4948 · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-drama?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:22962a93-46d3-4a9a-8e53-173be57e694bPost:1b689082-e3cb-4664-bb09-24797eb80141">Re: Invitation Wording Drama ...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Invitation Wording Drama ... : Now you are judging my tradition. Outdated and sexist? You can't have it both ways.<strong> It is never necessary to indentify the groom by anything other than his name.</strong> I'm tired of this. Goodnight!
Posted by CMGr[/QUOTE]

This is BS. Sometimes it is. And yes, I did judge your tradition because you found another one "horrifying." You don't get to have it both ways either.

Invitation Wording Drama ...

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