Community› Wedding Discussion Boards› Chit Chat
Chit Chat
New Discussion

I don't want my Mom's boyfriend at my wedding...

2010chrissy2010chrissy member
First Comment
in Chit Chat
My mom called me the other day and said her boyfriend was going to come to my wedding.  I am getting married in Vegas in October.

My dad passed away about 15 months ago and within about 6 months of his passing my mother started seeing this guy.  None of us (there are three of us) have met him and although I do want her to be happy I am a little upset about her decision to bring him to the wedding. It would have been nice for her to at least ask how I feel??  I just feel she is being a little selfish.

Am I being selfish? And if there is a time for me to be selfish isn't my wedding day that day? How do I talk to her about this??
Report Reply to Post

Re: I don't want my Mom's boyfriend at my wedding...

  • JenniferLuvsCandyJenniferLuvsCandy
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_dont-want-moms-boyfriend-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:c9a94bec-99b9-4e2d-84f7-8822694c237bPost:345c5cd6-b9ed-49fb-b8d7-bde7ada33669">Re: I don't want my Mom's boyfriend at my wedding...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I  Even if that means your friend Judy bringing her pompous ass of a boyfriend who drinks too much and won't shut up about the stupid Red Sox. Posted by Simply Fated[/QUOTE]
    OR the stupid Yankees . . .just sayin<img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-wink.gif" border="0" alt="Wink" title="Wink" />
    "I reject your reality and substitute my own." "Who doesn't LOVE candy?" Image and video hosting by TinyPic Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    Report Reply
  • HisCBHisCB
    500 Comments
    i agree, try not to think of him as your moms way to replace your dad, he is the s/o of a guest. and ditto this being a great way to meet him.
    to answer your question, yes you are being selfish. and NO just because its your wedding you dont get to be selfish.
    10-10 siggy favorite summer picture Image and video hosting by TinyPic http://hiscb.blogspot.com/
    Report Reply
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    10000 Comments
    While it must be really hard to deal with your father's passing at the same time as your mother moving on so quickly, I agree with PPs that the new boyfriend should be invited. I don't understand how your mom could get a new guy so quickly, but then again I don't know you or your family dynamics.

    It's rude to say he can't come, especially since by October they will have been together a decent amount of time. How come no one has ever met him? You might even want to visit your mom before the wedding and meet him, just to get an idea of the guy. Who knows, maybe you will like him.
    Report Reply
  • MrsDR1015MrsDR1015 member
    First Comment
    My best friend is getting married in October and her fiancé is not comfortable with me bringing my boyfriend. So I'm bringing my best friend, instead.

    It's your wedding. If you're not comfortable with your mom's boyfriend being there, you have every right to voice that opinion. Whether or not she chooses to bring him, anyway, is a different story.
    Report Reply
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_dont-want-moms-boyfriend-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:c9a94bec-99b9-4e2d-84f7-8822694c237bPost:cd9884f7-b67c-45a5-a256-6788d42ef387">Re: I don't want my Mom's boyfriend at my wedding...</a>:
    [QUOTE]My best friend is getting married in October and her fiancé is not comfortable with me bringing my boyfriend. So I'm bringing my best friend, instead. 
    Posted by MrsDR1015[/QUOTE]

    <div>Seriously?  What kind of a friend does something like this?  Your friend sucks, and she's marrying a douche.  </div>
    Report Reply
  • princesscorpioprincesscorpio
    10 Comments
    edited April 2010
    I guess I am the only one that is going to disagree with majority of you all. OP you have every right not to want him there. No it really has not been that long since your father has been gone. If you are still in your mourning stage than your mother should respect that, just like you have respected her mourning process.  Just tell your mother how you feel. I know I would and she would not be surprised with what I had to say. It is your day and should be done the way you want it to be done!

    My father has been gone for along time now and I will miss him on my day.
    Report Reply
  • 2010chrissy2010chrissy member
    First Comment
    PP-I appreciate that you took the time to read the OP...I DO want my Mom to be happy...it IS my day...and I DON"T know what to do!!


    Report Reply
  • luckyme502luckyme502 member
    1000 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_dont-want-moms-boyfriend-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:c9a94bec-99b9-4e2d-84f7-8822694c237bPost:ff72d279-2fb9-4c1a-ad0a-4e7f5ab0ce3f">Re: I don't want my Mom's boyfriend at my wedding...</a>:
    [QUOTE]PP-I appreciate that you took the time to read the OP...I DO want my Mom to be happy...it IS my day...and I DON"T know what to do!!
    Posted by 2010chrissy[/QUOTE]

    It is not your day.  Once you invite people to share it with you, it is no longer your day, it is not even your and your fi's day. 
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    2011 Reading Challenge

    Jessica has read 16 books toward her goal of 150 books.
    hide
    "It's fine to have an open mind, just not so open your brains fall out."
    Report Reply
  • aerinpegadrakaerinpegadrak member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    Put yourself in your mom's shoes.  If you were invited to the wedding of someone very important to you, but they told you they didn't want your FI there, wouldn't you be horribly insulted?

    They're a package deal now.  If you don't like it, too bad.  If you don't want the boyfriend there, you can't invite Mom.  If you want Mom, you have to invite the boyfriend.  Anything other than these two courses of action would be horribly rude.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

    image
    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards