My mom passed away.. how to remember her at our wedding?

ashleylovesmark · September 2010

My mom passed away 6 months before I met my fiance so sadly they never got to meet. I want to remember her at our wedding but nothing too emotional. I'm thinking incoporating her favorite flower... maybe wrap my bouquet in a piece of her dress or use her veil if I can find either.

Any other ideas? Anyone else been there done that? Thanks in advance!

LaRositaMonita · September 2010

We had our officiant say a few words at the beginning of our ceremony to both honor our parents and remember relatives who had passed away and couldn't be there that day. It took just a few moments but was very nice. Would that be too much? I can find the text she used for you. I have also heard of people lighting a candle in memoiram at the beginning of their ceremony or leaving a seat empty (sometimes with a flower on it) for the relative who isn't there. I'm not sure how often she pops in here anymore or how she might feel about a stranger bringing it up, but you might want to page Soon2BGreen814 here or on the Nest. Her father passed away only a few weeks before her wedding last year.

ooodsie · September 2010

We left an open seat and a Martini glass in honor of my grandmother. Maybe something along those lines like leaving a seat open for her? Or would that be too emotional possibly?

Bride_to_be_2011 · September 2010

I would incorporate moms fav flowers. Leaving an empty chair might be too much on the wedding day, you don't want to be sad.

jennycod · September 2010

say something sincerely on your wedding to express your love to her. She would hear

[Deleted User] · September 2010

I really like the flower idea or maybe a piece of her jewelry. I think the other stuff can often be too sad or creepy.

My brother died and when someone suggested we do something my mom outright refused. She said it was too sad for a happy day, so we are doing nothing.

I do think it depends on you and your family and the circumstances though. A grandparents dying and a parents or child is different IMO.

PharmJen · September 2010

Dh's father passed away several years before we met so to honor him, I ordered DH a guardan angel pin from etsy that had a tiny frame for his picture (I also ordered a bouquet charm that I put a picture of my grandfather in). He pinned his inside his tux jacket while mine was pinned to the ribbon on my bouquet. He also wrote something for our program for him and we did a memory candle at the reception in honor of all our loved ones who were no longer with us.

miguelhilary2010 · September 2010

I ordered memorial candles (glass cylindar with candle inside) w/grandparents and family friend's name etched into them. The candles were put on the card table at the cocktail hour/reception.

Most people didn't notice them, but our parents and relatives appreciated the gesture. We gave the glass to our parents to keep.

LadyJ10 · September 2010

I had a bouquet pin with a picture of my grandfather (who was a big influence in my life, but not nearly as close as a parent), and that was great to have "him" so close on the wedding day. It was fairly subtle, and the only one who asked me about it was my FIL (my family knew about it before).

joysaw00 · September 2010

I like your idea of incorporating a flower or other element she would have liked. I also think a brief mention at the beginning of the ceremony is a very nice and respectful touch.

I always ask couples whose weddings I officiate if they would like me to mention in special honor any guests who have traveled a great distance, OR who are no longer here, during the start of the ceremony. Here I will paste a sample from one, which you could suggest to your officiant:

Welcome. We come together this evening to affirm the commitment that Sabrina and Ken make to each other; we celebrate them as individuals and together as they enter this union of marriage. Special moments are made even more special when friends and family come together to share in our joy. You are each present for a particular reason bringing your love and friendship to witness the formal covenant of the union of Sabrina and Ken.

Some of you have traveled a great distance.

NAMES HERE

We also we take a moment to remember with love those who are no longer with us physically but who are always with us in our hearts.

NAMES HERE

Hope this helps,
Joysa
http://wanderinghebrew.com/weddings-and-funerals-jewish-or-interfaith/

amy727 · September 2010

I've never posted here because I'm having my wedding in Pittsburgh, but I've been lurking recently.

How about using some of her jewelry. I am having my grandmother's ring tied into my bouquet. That way my grandmother is there at the wedding walking me down the isle.

ashleylovesmark · September 2010

thanks all for the input. i think i'll definitely do the empty chair with flowers on it (she was a florist actually so that sounds lovely!)

My mom passed away.. how to remember her at our wedding?

Re: My mom passed away.. how to remember her at our wedding?

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