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Tipping questions for catholic ceremony

melevebaldmelevebald
First Comment
in Catholic Weddings

I am trying to figure out tips for my ceremony participants, and would like some advice:
1.  Is it preferable to give the priest his gift in cash or is a check ok? 
2. Should I tip the music director for the church?  His fee is covered in the church's fee, but he has been very helpful.
3. What is a suggested fee/tip for the servers (I don't know them - they are girls my mom knows.  They are not wedding guests).
3. I have small gifts for the readers, distributors, the people brining up the gifts, etc.  Is there anyone else you can think of to tip for the Catholic ceremony?  I think I have the reception and other wedding vendors under control

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Re: Tipping questions for catholic ceremony

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    laureneslaurenes
    First Comment First Anniversary
    edited December 2011

    I'm not sure about the priest, but I know that people usually tip the altar boys/girls around $25 a head. I've heard of a lot of people doing this in gift card form. I think it's wise to go the amazon gift card route, but I'm sure cash will also be fine.

    I'm just having family and friends do the reading, prayer of the faithful, etc. I think they are just excited to be part of the wedding, but that's very nice of you to get them gifts (who know, maybe I'm making some big mistake by not doing the same, though my parents were gift bearers at my cousins wedding and didn't get anything to my knowledge... and were still very happy).

    If the music director has been particularly helpful, I would just get him a gift - nice bottle of wine, or something along those lines, with a thank you note. Some people feel weird getting tipped for what they just did out of the goodness of their hearts, but a small gift would be a nice token of appreciation. At least to me.

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    meep2meep2 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_tipping-questions-catholic-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:a5d6b40e-b352-46a1-98d4-e59b88890e1ePost:98d06775-c5d8-4460-ae19-f9c632662862">Re: Tipping questions for catholic ceremony</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm not sure about the priest, but I know that people usually tip the altar boys/girls around $25 a head. I've heard of a lot of people doing this in gift card form. I think it's wise to go the amazon gift card route, but I'm sure cash will also be fine. I'm just having family and friends do the reading, prayer of the faithful, etc. I think they are just excited to be part of the wedding, but that's very nice of you to get them gifts (who know, maybe I'm making some big mistake by not doing the same, though my parents were gift bearers at my cousins wedding and didn't get anything to my knowledge... and were still very happy). <strong>If the music director has been particularly helpful, I would just get him a gift - nice bottle of wine, or something along those lines, with a thank you note. Some people feel weird getting tipped for what they just did out of the goodness of their hearts, but a small gift would be a nice token of appreciation. At least to me.</strong>
    Posted by laurenes[/QUOTE]

    I disagree. Since her music director is a member of the church who is taking their time to perform at the wedding and not a friend doing it as a gift, a tip would be polite, especially since there is a fee involved. This tip would be split amongst the musicians. This usually goes regardless of whether they are normally church volunteers or professionals that the church hires. I've worked as a church musician on a volunteer basis and always received compensation and a tip for weddings without asking.
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    Calypso1977Calypso1977 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    we gave cash to the priest and altar servers.  the church fee and organist we paid by check.  i did not tip the organist because her fee was pretty hefty AND she didnt go above and beyond since i made it really easy for her and told her to play whatever she wanted. 

    we were generous with the altar servers.  we gave them $40 each.  i know their family doesnt have much, and tehy gave up a good chunk of their saturday to serve our mass. 

    all of the payments i placed inside a thoughtful thank you note.

    i think you have everyone else covered.
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    mica178mica178 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I don't think it matters, cash or check.

    I gave a gift card to my organist as a thank you (in addition to paying her fee).  And I wrote her a nice note.  She did go above and beyond.

    We gave gifts to our readers/cantor that were on par with the groomsmen gifts.
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