I think I might be crasy (cats, budget, dresses)

Yikes2012 · May 2011

Hi All,
I just got engaged, and am a first time poster (Good Golly, now I understand why people elope...such a big event to plan!!!)

I have some questions, and I think one of them in particular is kinda weird, but I hope someone might be able to help.

Weird Question: Has anyone ever tried to involve their pet in a wedding?

I will explain: I have 4 cats, three are very shy around strangers, however the fourth is not (and was adopted by myself and FH the day after we met...) and I would love for him to be ring bearer (with a human attendant of course...to keep him on track). Just wondering what other brides thoughts are. I want it to happen, but realistically, Im not sure venues will allow it.

Second question: Slightly less weird.....Im In the Boston area, and it appears there are David's Bridal shops and then boutiques here, nothing else....I dont like what ive seen on the DB website, but I am terrified to go into a boutique, because I feel like I my budget is too small for that. I havent roughed out my total budget yet, but paying more than 750 for the dress seems rediculous to me. Id love to pay a lot less....a few hundred maybe. What bridal shops am I not thinking about, or is it just that there is one big bridal chain and the rest are all small independently owned places that have designer gowns shipped in?

Finally, about my budget....I know I want to get the most bang for my buck, but when I think about the wedding, I think most of my budget will be eaten up in venue and catering costs.....so is it wrong to start building a realistic budget around estimated venue and catering costs, and then tweak it as I go? Am I missing a huge expense somewhere?

Thank you for your help in advance!!!!

Rachaelmb · May 2011

Sit down and think of the guest list first.. the number you invite makes a big dif. in the budget. I chose my venue based on cost and what they had to offer -- something to keep an eye out for is that some venues pricing per person includes all tax and gratuities, some don't. That is a HUGE cost - (I'm in NH) figure about 8% meals tax and at minimum 15% gratuity. Also the place I chose has a great package that incudes meal, cocktail hour, the cake (from my favorite bakery), floral centerpieces, champagene toast, and choice of table linens and chair covers plus a room for us to stay in the night of the wedding. The difference was about $20 more per person which seemed like a lot at first but once I looked into the individual prices of flowers and cakes and everything else it is a really good deal.The other big expences are photographer and dj - two things you don't really want to be cheap on - the dj makes or breaks the party and when the day is done , you want great pictures.
As far as dresses, I thought I could find something for about $500 and be fine with that. I went to DB and found a few in that price that were ok... I went to some sales at other places and didn't like anything, and then went to a place where the staff was amazing, and found the perfect dress ( is wanted a halter style for a fall wedding - everything out there is strapless) the cost was $1000. My parents and I split it. (If you are close to Nashua NH - Marry & Tux is Awesome!!
I've been planning since September, and getting married in October and the one thing I have learned is that many things that I thought were a good idea in the beginning, I have changed my mind as time goes on. I'm not super traditonal but as time goes on and decisions get made some "traditional" decisions just make more sense. Happy Planning and Congrats!!

ldawngirl · May 2011

Congrats! I have to say there are times I'm tempted to elope, but it'll be worth it in the end!

1. I'm a fellow cat lover, but I say no. Way too many people are allergic. You don't want people to not be able to come because your cat is there or people sniffling and sneezing all night.

2. Agree with PPs - not all boutiques have expensive dresses. Just go in and tell them what you want budget and dress-wise and let them work with it.

3. Don't build the budget around the wedding. Build the wedding around the budget. When we first started planning, we did up a rough budget based on a sit-down dinner and realized there was no way we could afford that on our own (without taking on debt), so we figured out what we could afford and went from there. We're doing a cocktail reception (no sit-down dinner). We're saving tons of money, but we're still having an awesome party!

ctag416 · May 2011

Hi, Congrats!!! I'm from Boston too! For dresses, there is Alfred Angelo, they have a couple stores in Mass but definitely go to some boutiques like others have said not all have high price tags. There is an event coming to boston June 11 and 12 at the Sheraton. It is Brides against Breast Cancer and it is suppose to be a great event. All the dresses are donated some from brides and some from designers(brand new). The prices start at 199. I think it definitely worth checking out.

http://pepmembers.org/forums/index.php?showtopic=1434

Goodluck!!!

LuluP82 · May 2011

I'd forget about the cat! My cat loves ppl too but she would not do well walking down an aisle. Plus, I personally think it's weird.

For dresses, you can call the boutiques and see what their prices are too. I went to a couple and at some, when I called to make an appointment, the ladies asked me my budget straight up. You could also try JCrew...they have some good basic inexpensive dresses that you could dress up with accessories, too. I tried them on-- they were good quality fabrics, which is what is important to me personally.

I'd also just set a budget first, then figure out other things. But yes, the biggest expenses are generally food and beverage. Photos are pricey, too.

MilitaryBride2Be · May 2011

You got some great ideas for budget and dresses from PPs. As far as the cat goes I would probably try to incorporate him/her in another way. Perhaps if you're having alcholo create a signiture drink named after him, or have his photo on the favors. Something that would be understated but cute and not negatively affect those you are allergic.

If you're looking for awesome vendor recs to help you stay on budget I would check out your local board, I'm sure they're great!

Yikes2012 · May 2011

I just have to say thank you to everyone!!!!

I know the cat idea is a little nuts, but he's our baby. If I cant have him in the ceremony (and the reasons I have heard are all good, valid points!!) I know I can find another way to incorporate him :-) Perhaps a Catnip Cocktail or something LOL!

I absolutely love the dress info. I think I will call around and see who around here might be able to work with my budget. But a dress at $200 sounds like its worth a trip intown!

Love the idea of a cocktail reception!! I went to a cake and punch reception, and it was cool, totally fit the couple! But I have my heart set on dancing, and the reception I was at didnt have that....from what I have read those cake and punch receptions are supposed to be real quick.

Again, I appreciate everyones input!!! :-) Thank you!!

jdrose5 · May 2011

yeah the catnip cocktail or something is a great idea. I have seen dogs as ring bearers but even if I knew no one I invited had allergies, I just can't see a cat doing well with all the people/walking when where you want etc. Cats are just not as umm apt to do what you want as a dog.

I think I might be crasy (cats, budget, dresses)

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