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What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?

SecretGroom62SecretGroom62 member
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in Snarky Brides
What 5 things does your guy do that makes you love him... turns you on... lets you know you're with the right guy?
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Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?

  • AllAboutTheBenjaminAllAboutTheBenjamin member
    10000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    edited October 2010
    What if I don't have five things?  What if there's only one thing?  What if there's a hundred things?

    ...Who are you?  What's a secret groom?  Is that different from a regular groom?

    I have so many questions.  And I demand answers.
    panther
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  • SarahPLizSarahPLiz member
    10000 Comments
    edited October 2010
    I'm not telling you, because I don't want you to be creepy and use them to try to turn me on. That would be odd. 

    ETA: If you are trying to find out for purposes of seducing a certain woman, tell us who she is and we can give you ideas. If we don't know her, then you may freak her out using some of our ideas. Not good. 
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  • kd.josephkd.joseph
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_favorite-5-things-guy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:0c16de1e-27f6-41a5-93c2-cec63bffdf2aPost:2f01f161-89db-4409-8e4d-31b03102ebca">Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]What if I don't have five things?  What if there's only one thing?  What if there's a hundred things? ...Who are you?  What's a secret groom?  Is that different from a regular groom? I have so many questions.  And I demand answers.
    Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]

    Ditto!

    Is it like a Secret Santa?
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  • rhodesignrhodesign
    1000 Comments
    I could tell you, but I can guarantee that you can't do any of them yourself. Like, most people can't. It's pretty involved and takes lots and lots of muscle stregnth, endurance and mental flexibility. And sometimes a rabbit.
    image
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  • ohwhynotohwhynot member
    2500 Comments

    Two little words: 

    Adult. 

    Diapers. 

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  • betrothed123betrothed123
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    I think he just wants to read these things that turn us on and jack it at the computer.
    kd.joseph's wish is my command
    image
    Just call me "Brothel"
    And betrothed, I'm disgusted with most of the comments that you have posted. I don't think I've ever read such judgmental comments in my life. I'm so lucky that the girls I speak to on theknot are nothing like you...I would've never come on here for ADVICE if I would've encountered a big a bitch as you. I genuinely feel awful for your children or your future children, and I think it would be irresponsible of YOU not to invest in their future therapy sessions starting now. Because trust me when I tell you honey, they're gonna need it. ~jcaruncho2010
    my read shelf:
    Betrothed 123's book recommendations, favorite quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
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  • LessThanZeroLessThanZero
    2500 Comments
    What the hell...

    I just appreciate when the trash is taken out. When he doesn't whine about me watching my shows. And that it's impossible to stay mad at him for long. It's sexxxy.
    Report Reply
  • betrothed123betrothed123
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_favorite-5-things-guy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:0c16de1e-27f6-41a5-93c2-cec63bffdf2aPost:48b205b3-0a49-42e7-9afa-6b9f81b9d2e8">Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Two little words:  Adult.  Diapers. 
    Posted by ohwhynot[/QUOTE]
    That is hot.  I'm jealous.
    kd.joseph's wish is my command
    image
    Just call me "Brothel"
    And betrothed, I'm disgusted with most of the comments that you have posted. I don't think I've ever read such judgmental comments in my life. I'm so lucky that the girls I speak to on theknot are nothing like you...I would've never come on here for ADVICE if I would've encountered a big a bitch as you. I genuinely feel awful for your children or your future children, and I think it would be irresponsible of YOU not to invest in their future therapy sessions starting now. Because trust me when I tell you honey, they're gonna need it. ~jcaruncho2010
    my read shelf:
    Betrothed 123's book recommendations, favorite quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
    Report Reply
  • AllAboutTheBenjaminAllAboutTheBenjamin member
    10000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    Are you a secret groom because you're getting married but have no bride yet?

    I am so confused.

    Why do you want to know what turns me on?  Are you stalking me?  ...I'm kinda already spoken for.  Just sayin.
    panther
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  • kd.josephkd.joseph
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_favorite-5-things-guy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:0c16de1e-27f6-41a5-93c2-cec63bffdf2aPost:88044054-142f-4ae8-bb99-d44f69c439c1">Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I could tell you, but I can guarantee that you can't do any of them yourself. Like, most people can't. It's pretty involved and takes lots and lots of muscle stregnth, endurance and mental flexibility. And sometimes a rabbit.
    Posted by rhodesign[/QUOTE]

    HA! This is great Rho!
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  • StarmusicaStarmusica
    1000 Comments
    i echo other posts- whats a secret groom... introduce yourself before seducing us!

    Now With Pro Pics&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbspOur Wedding Highlights!&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp

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    my book shelf:
    Steph N's book recommendations, favorite quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (currently-reading shelf)
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  • ohwhynotohwhynot member
    2500 Comments
    Is anyone else reminded of Smoove B. right now? 

    "And there will be strawberries.  And the finest linens. . . "
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  • LessThanZeroLessThanZero
    2500 Comments
    Maybe it's Vegas Groom's AE?

    Report Reply
  • SarahPLizSarahPLiz member
    10000 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_favorite-5-things-guy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:0c16de1e-27f6-41a5-93c2-cec63bffdf2aPost:745047e1-bb25-4775-9692-c06c0d9391ce">Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Maybe it's Vegas Groom's AE?
    Posted by LessThanZero[/QUOTE]

    <div>Nah, he'd just ask us. I don't think VG has any shame about asking us anything. </div>
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    10000 Comments
    Betrothed are you faking us out again? No? Okay, then I want to know how the hell someone can be a secret groom. Does your bride to be know you're planning a wedding or are you going to just marry her in her sleep?

    And maybe my H doesn't need to do 5 things. Maybe he's so awesome he only has to do 1.
    Report Reply
  • AllAboutTheBenjaminAllAboutTheBenjamin member
    10000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    SG - What about the things that I force my man to do in order to make me happy?  Like how I made him buy me four 3+ carat engagement rings, demand breakfast in bed every morning and how I spend his paychecks on the ZOMG BEST CLOTHES EVAR.  Do these things count?  Or what about the things he just does because he's freaking scared of me?
    panther
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  • NatesGirl16NatesGirl16
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker

    Really?  You have to ask?  Poop, sex swing, and electroejaculator. 

    Report Reply
  • AllAboutTheBenjaminAllAboutTheBenjamin member
    10000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_favorite-5-things-guy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:0c16de1e-27f6-41a5-93c2-cec63bffdf2aPost:27f107ae-6e73-4f87-b616-82dbf0c391f4">Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Really?  You have to ask?  Poop, sex swing, and electroejaculator. 
    Posted by NatesGirl16[/QUOTE]


    Wait.  Those are the things you do for me.
    panther
    Report Reply
  • AnysunriseAnysunrise member
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker

    He clips my freakishly long toe nails. And then grinds the clippings into powder and snorts it. That's how I know he loves me.

    Report Reply
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    10000 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_favorite-5-things-guy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:0c16de1e-27f6-41a5-93c2-cec63bffdf2aPost:b5f4e112-2d05-4376-9aa5-ee4b3497ada1">Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]SG - What about the things that I force my man to do in order to make me happy?  Like how I made him buy me four 3+ carat engagement rings, demand breakfast in bed every morning and how I spend his paychecks on the ZOMG BEST CLOTHES EVAR.  Do these things count?  Or what about the things he just does because he's freaking scared of me?
    Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]

    You're a better woman than me. I keep mine chained in the basement to a metal rod hanging from the ceiling with a collar around his throat. he only gets to come out in exchange for foot massages and sexual favors.
    Report Reply
  • NatesGirl16NatesGirl16
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_favorite-5-things-guy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:0c16de1e-27f6-41a5-93c2-cec63bffdf2aPost:00a51e3b-4bca-4e3c-a358-eb32453715c3">Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you? : Wait.  Those are the things you do for me.
    Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]
    OOOPs!  I forgot!

    I'm with Any--consumption=love.
    Report Reply
  • AllAboutTheBenjaminAllAboutTheBenjamin member
    10000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_favorite-5-things-guy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:0c16de1e-27f6-41a5-93c2-cec63bffdf2aPost:ffe17de8-8694-4a0d-a719-43ce08ec0747">Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you? : You're a better woman than me. I keep mine chained in the basement to a metal rod hanging from the ceiling with a collar around his throat. he only gets to come out in exchange for foot massages and sexual favors.
    Posted by Seshat411[/QUOTE]

    We just have different priorities, you and I.  I like a guy I can sponge off of and parade around to all my friends as my fun little toy who I force to give me things.  You like to keep yours locked away for your own sadistic pleasure.  This does not make us bad people.  It makes us bitches on a mission who know what we want.
    panther
    Report Reply
  • NatesGirl16NatesGirl16
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_favorite-5-things-guy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:0c16de1e-27f6-41a5-93c2-cec63bffdf2aPost:ffe17de8-8694-4a0d-a719-43ce08ec0747">Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you? : You're a better woman than me. I keep mine chained in the basement to a metal rod hanging from the ceiling with a collar around his throat. he only gets to come out in exchange for foot massages and sexual favors.
    Posted by Seshat411[/QUOTE]
    It puts the lotion on its skin.
    Report Reply
  • LessThanZeroLessThanZero
    2500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_favorite-5-things-guy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:0c16de1e-27f6-41a5-93c2-cec63bffdf2aPost:723d5def-0e99-499c-bbfd-861e9e356946">Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you? : Nah, he'd just ask us. I don't think VG has any shame about asking us anything. 
    Posted by SarahPLiz[/QUOTE]

    I didn't really mean it. Somehow in my head, it was funny. It didn't translate.
    Report Reply
  • kd.josephkd.joseph
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_favorite-5-things-guy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:0c16de1e-27f6-41a5-93c2-cec63bffdf2aPost:ffe17de8-8694-4a0d-a719-43ce08ec0747">Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you? : You're a better woman than me. I keep mine chained in the basement to a metal rod hanging from the ceiling with a collar around his throat. he only gets to come out in exchange for foot massages and sexual favors.
    Posted by Seshat411[/QUOTE]

    My DH might like this a little too much!


    Nates- watch it now! You are cheating on me out in the open now.
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  • AllAboutTheBenjaminAllAboutTheBenjamin member
    10000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_favorite-5-things-guy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:0c16de1e-27f6-41a5-93c2-cec63bffdf2aPost:3e881a90-5af3-470d-ad31-bf05598a5236">Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you? : My DH might like this a little too much! <strong>Nates- watch it now! You are cheating on me out in the open now.</strong>
    Posted by kd.joseph[/QUOTE]

    Don't blame her.  It's not her fault.  I have very magnetic slut energy.  It's irresistable.
    panther
    Report Reply
  • AnysunriseAnysunrise member
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_favorite-5-things-guy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:0c16de1e-27f6-41a5-93c2-cec63bffdf2aPost:18ee9035-4f6c-4c5a-994d-e71c1d1040da">Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you? : Don't blame her.  It's not her fault. <strong> I have very magnetic slut energy.  It's irresistable.
    </strong>Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]

    Can I claim this as a sig quote?
    Report Reply
  • NatesGirl16NatesGirl16
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_favorite-5-things-guy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:0c16de1e-27f6-41a5-93c2-cec63bffdf2aPost:3e881a90-5af3-470d-ad31-bf05598a5236">Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you? : My DH might like this a little too much! Nates- watch it now! You are cheating on me out in the open now.
    Posted by kd.joseph[/QUOTE]

    Will you please make a skin suit of of me and steal my engagement ring?  That is love to me.  Otherwise, we're just playing games.
    Report Reply
  • AllAboutTheBenjaminAllAboutTheBenjamin member
    10000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_favorite-5-things-guy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:0c16de1e-27f6-41a5-93c2-cec63bffdf2aPost:ae974148-a8a2-4075-b1ea-d671b2b36229">Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: What are your favorite 5 things your guy does for you? : Can I claim this as a sig quote?
    Posted by Anysunrise[/QUOTE]


    HURRY!
    panther
    Report Reply
  • AnysunriseAnysunrise member
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    Done and done.
    Report Reply
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