Registry

Shaye526 · August 2010

I'm sort of having issues with registries right now. I know I have plenty of time until I even need to make one but I just started looking around and setting one of them up (I'm trying to get most things out of the way as early as possible). Everytime I go looking for things, I stop and think "well that's nice but I don't really need that".

I think it has to do with my attitude and habits about spending money. I've never had alot of money and I hate shopping because I just feel guilty whenever I buy something. So even though with a registry, it's other people buying things, I'm having a hard time coming up with more than 3 or 4 items because things don't seem necessary to me. I can't seem to justify providing people with a list of things they can buy me, when i don't feel like I absolutely need them. Does this make sense?

I need someone to hype me up about this. Usually people sound excited about their registry and I am more anxious about it than anything.

number55 · August 2010

What I loved about the registry is that it is full of things I would NEVER buy for myself. I don't like spending money if I don't have to, and I never upgrade things until they break and I absolutely have to. I didn't want to register because really, we have all the things we need. Are they all nice things, no, but they do. But I registered because FIs family wanted us to. So we did, and I know we won't get it all, which is fine but it will be nice to get some nice stuff that I would never buy otherwise.

[Deleted User] · August 2010

What about upgrading? New towels, sheets, dinnerware, etc. Then you're not necessaily getting new stuff you don't need or have room for, but better replacements for old crap you can throw out.

AllAboutTheBenjamin · August 2010

Dude - I'm the same exact way. I'm always really careful with my money and only ever buy things that I absolutely must need - with an occasional splurge here and there (because I can only take the madness of bare essentials for so long!)

My fiance and I started our registry this weekend, and he made me feel pretty good about things. I did feel bad about some of our items we've registered for so far - like our pots and pans, and the knives we picked out. Our place settings are kinda expensive.

Think of it this way - this is the last time people are going to be giving you cool shiit. Sure, when babies come, there's THAT... but that's all baby stuff. These are things that you and your fiance will use to make a life together. You don't have to pick out a ton of really expensive things, either. At BBB where we're registering, they can actually divide things up - the knives we registered for are 200 bucks for the set - but our guests have the option to buy us sections of the knives if they can't pay the whole thing. Same with out pots and pans.

Just relax and go with it. It's fun

Shaye526 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:86582082-2f57-44f4-b602-b9eec76ef4fdPost:10eedafe-4c01-4e01-aa58-39868b0cffc0">Re: Registry</a>:
[QUOTE]What about upgrading? New towels, sheets, dinnerware, etc. Then you're not necessaily getting new stuff you don't need or have room for, but better replacements for old crap you can throw out.
Posted by Seshat411[/QUOTE]

Thanks, I guess I didn't even think of it that way. We could definitely use an upgrade on some dishes and utensils!

Shaye526 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:86582082-2f57-44f4-b602-b9eec76ef4fdPost:bb2ada61-f854-41ae-b523-a123bd18e900">Re: Registry</a>:
[QUOTE]Dude - I'm the same exact way. I'm always really careful with my money and only ever buy things that I absolutely must need - with an occasional splurge here and there (because I can only take the madness of bare essentials for so long!) My fiance and I started our registry this weekend, and he made me feel pretty good about things. I did feel bad about some of our items we've registered for so far - like our pots and pans, and the knives we picked out. Our place settings are kinda expensive. <strong>Think of it this way - this is the last time people are going to be giving you cool shiit.</strong> Sure, when babies come, there's THAT... but that's all baby stuff. These are things that you and your fiance will use to make a life together. You don't have to pick out a ton of really expensive things, either. At BBB where we're registering, they can actually divide things up - the knives we registered for are 200 bucks for the set - but our guests have the option to buy us sections of the knives if they can't pay the whole thing. Same with out pots and pans. Just relax and go with it. It's fun :)
Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]

Very true. I'm probably going to have to do this in several stages. Pick out 2 or 3 things and then stop, wait a week and pick out another 2 or 3 things.

I feel a little better about it now. ; )

number55 · August 2010

Shaye...if your wedding is over a year out, don't go registering yet!

We registered about 6 months out and still had stuff discontinued. Register about 2 months before your first shower (my first shower was 4 months before the wedding, hence the registering 6 months out), that way you will be able to register for stuff that will still be there when your wedding guests go to buy stuff.

Also, if you register for stuff at different price points, don't worry too much about the expensive stuff. We have a kitchenaid mixer and dyson vacuum that are expensive on ours but I figure if nobody buys it at least we can get 10% off to buy it ourselves if we want to.

gottahavashorti · August 2010

The way I looked at it was, "is this an item of good enough quality that I'll use it for years to come? Do I use this item often enough for it to be worth registering for top of the line for this item, or should I stick to mid or low range?"

When people give a wedding gift, they'll probably want it to be something you use for years. So we registered for nice towels that will last much longer than lower end towels, a nice starter knife set because I enjoy cooking and tend to do lot of chopping and slicing, and mid-range copper bottom pots because while I love cooking I'm not quite enough into cooking to need the $2-300 per piece copper clad pots and I highly prefer copper of some sort. For our dishes, we upgraded from the plates I had in college to more versatile stoneware that will also look great for holiday dinners.

Since I don't use a food processor or blender much but do need them sometimes, we registered for a combination food processor/blender rather than a top of the line item for both. We didn't register for a nice mixer like a KitchenAid because I really don't bake often.

Shaye526 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:86582082-2f57-44f4-b602-b9eec76ef4fdPost:cfbbb4f8-c71d-4504-a28e-73d0d77dc139">Re: Registry</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>Shaye...if your wedding is over a year out, don't go registering yet! We registered about 6 months out and still had stuff discontinued</strong>. Register about 2 months before your first shower (my first shower was 4 months before the wedding, hence the registering 6 months out), that way you will be able to register for stuff that will still be there when your wedding guests go to buy stuff. Also, if you register for stuff at different price points, don't worry too much about the expensive stuff. We have a kitchenaid mixer and dyson vacuum that are expensive on ours but I figure if nobody buys it at least we can get 10% off to buy it ourselves if we want to.
Posted by number55[/QUOTE]

Yeah I didn't go crazy with it. I just wanted to set up an account and I looked online at stuff just to get a feel of what I might like or need. I ended up finding about 3 items and then I was just like, "how the fvck am I supposed to do this?" and I quit. LOL.

SarahPLiz · August 2010

FI and I are the same way, but people kept asking, so we made a registry. I am so embarrassed by the $300 sheet sets that are on it, but that's what he wanted. He's picky about sheets and I know I'm not spending $300 on a set of sheets. His theory is that if we have to make a registry, it should be for stuff we wouldn't buy normally.

In fact, he has a set that he bought for the first night I slept over. Then he didn't change them for about 2 months, and they got all sweat stained, and his comforter dyed them pink. I've been trying to get the stains out for 3 years, to no avail. I almost threw them out yesterday, but thought I'd try bleaching them again. Well, now they are white again, but apparently I bleached holes in them. OOPS. I guess I'll have to cut them up and make chair cushions and a table cloth. I feel so horrible, though!

Shaye526 · August 2010

Sarah, just save those sheets for halloween and be a good old fashioned ghost (like in Beetlejuice)

Thanks everyone for the advice, it helped me feel much better about the concept. : )

catemeg · August 2010

My boyfriend and I aren't engaged yet, but all the time he says things like, "Don't buy a new sauce pan. Before you know it, we'll have one of those 'register thingys' and you'll get to pick out all new pots & pans!" He also uses this to justify why I shouldn't drop $125 to get a decent food processer. He's also decided he wants a juicer. So when we get engaged, it's going to be hell keeping him from registering for EVERYTHING! Haha, so I guess I can't relate too much! I'm not allowed to buy new stuff until we register, apparently!

It's good to have a few things right away in case someone wants to get you an engagement gift, but you should check back every couple of months (or have one early registry and one later register, if you don't want to peek) so you can refresh with things that will be in stock when your wedding comes around, and to give people plenty of options.

Think of things you'd enjoy but wouldn't necessarily purchase yourself (juicer, ice cream maker, bread maker if you're into cooking; outdoor furniture or picnic baskets if you spend time outside, etc.). Also think of things you could use upgrading, like linens and towels and dishes and silverware. You can get a spice rack, or vases, or other things that will be a nice addition to your home.

Registry

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