Am I bugging my guests?

squirrly · December 2009

Banana, there you go being all logical and helpful (and nice) again.

banana468 · December 2009

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_am-bugging-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:ec4317d8-31ff-42b8-ba80-0bcd061cbaf1Post:42b37b68-509d-4d39-a7af-ef9527b177fa">Re: Am I bugging my guests?</a>:
[QUOTE]Banana, there you go being all logical and helpful (and nice) again. :)
Posted by squirrly[/QUOTE]

It's a curse!

Theresa626 · December 2009

The thing is she didn't pester them to respond prior to the response date. They rudely didn't bother to respond by the response date.

Chiibride · December 2009

You know what? Of the 50 people I have invited so far,maybe 5 people even saw the facebook post, and 3 i know werent offended by it, the other 45 people people i invited dont even know what the hell is going on. I was targeting a specific group of girls that havent even RESPONDED to getting the invite, which I think is a little rude. If someone invited me to their wedding. I would be like " Hey, I got your invitation. Im super psyched you invited me and I will try to make the trip. I'll let you know." Or "got your invite, but I know I cant make it". I dont get how that is unreasonable. And I dont get how having an A and B list is rude. its not like I go telling people, hey, yr on my B list. No one but me and my maid of honor know that a preliminary set of invites have been sent out. I will invite the additional 16 from the B list and just be prepared for every single person to show up. Id rather have 66 people show up and fill the venue that have 30 people come and im wasting money. So I solved my OWN problem, so I guess it wasnt a total waste coming on here.

mocha beans · December 2009

Because the response date was 2 months out from the wedding, in the middle of the holiday season. I wouldn't have given a response by then either.

lyndausvi · December 2009

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_am-bugging-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ec4317d8-31ff-42b8-ba80-0bcd061cbaf1Post:baf4a221-475b-4cf1-abf3-6e941a33c2fd">Re: Am I bugging my guests?</a>:
[QUOTE]The thing is she didn't pester them to respond prior to the response date. They rudely didn't bother to respond by the response date.
Posted by Theresa626[/QUOTE]

Her RSVP date was Dec 20. This post was started at 10:30am on the 21. Starting to complain 10 hours after the due date past when it CHRISTMAS and the post office is running at full capacity is just ridiculous.

Forget about the fact a RSVP date more than 2 months out is unexceptable. It's CHRISTMAS time people are busy with holiday stuff.

Who knows if the guests even received the invite on time? I sent mine 8 weeks out in July and I had 2 guests not even receive invite until after the wedding date. I had 3 RSVP arrive the week of the wedding, yet the postmark was 6 weeks eariler. The guests did RSVP on time. I just did not get it from the post office in time.

I think the OP needs to just relax until the first of the year before start hounding people over a party 2 months away.

Night_Sprite · December 2009

[QUOTE]You know what? Of the 50 people I have invited so far,maybe 5 people even saw the facebook post, and 3 i know werent offended by it, the other 45 people people i invited dont even know what the hell is going on. I was targeting a specific group of girls that havent even RESPONDED to getting the invite, which I think is a little rude. If someone invited me to their wedding. I would be like " Hey, I got your invitation. Im super psyched you invited me and I will try to make the trip. I'll let you know." Or "got your invite, but I know I cant make it". I dont get how that is unreasonable. And I dont get how having an A and B list is rude. its not like I go telling people, hey, yr on my B list. No one but me and my maid of honor know that a preliminary set of invites have been sent out. I will invite the additional 16 from the B list and just be prepared for every single person to show up. Id rather have 66 people show up and fill the venue that have 30 people come and im wasting money. So I solved my OWN problem, so I guess it wasnt a total waste coming on here.
Posted by Chiibride[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Chili, I'm a February 6th bride with a January 16th RSVP, so we're on relatively similar timelines. It is no one's responsibility to call you and gush about your invitation. Only a few very close friends have done that about mine. I think you need to take a deep breath and try to look at this from someone else's perspective. I think half of the problem is that you don't see any perspective but your own. Try to have an attitude adjustment. Ultimately, it will be okay.
</div>

mocha beans · December 2009

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_am-bugging-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:ec4317d8-31ff-42b8-ba80-0bcd061cbaf1Post:c3765fd4-9f61-4fdd-909a-bc429996c039">Re: Am I bugging my guests?</a>:
[QUOTE]You know what? Of the 50 people I have invited so far,maybe 5 people even saw the facebook post, and 3 i know werent offended by it, the other 45 people people i invited dont even know what the hell is going on. I was targeting a specific group of girls that havent even RESPONDED to getting the invite, which I think is a little rude. If someone invited me to their wedding. I would be like " Hey, I got your invitation. Im super psyched you invited me and I will try to make the trip. I'll let you know." Or "got your invite, but I know I cant make it". I dont get how that is unreasonable. And I dont get how having an A and B list is rude. its not like I go telling people, hey, yr on my B list. No one but me and my maid of honor know that a preliminary set of invites have been sent out. I will invite the additional 16 from the B list and just be prepared for every single person to show up. Id rather have 66 people show up and fill the venue that have 30 people come and im wasting money. So I solved my OWN problem, so I guess it wasnt a total waste coming on here.
Posted by Chiibride[/QUOTE]

So what are you going to do when someone from the A list is talking to someone from the B list over the next month about the wedding and how excited they are about it, and B list person says they weren't invited. Then gets an invite a week later. I would feel pretty crappy as the B lister, that I was a pity invite.

Chiibride · December 2009

Poli, everything you said is 100% true. Thank You.

polichik · December 2009

You're welcome. I hope you feel better.

Goldlie11 · December 2009

I read through everything. I'll try not to repeat what others said. I just don't understand how you know whether or not your guests put the reply card in the mail shortly before or on the 20th. Mail usually takes a few days. It's even slower now because of the holidays. I ordered a gift card. The estimated date of arrival was the 17th. I just received it today (the 22nd).

goheels05 · December 2009

Oh wow. I had no idea this thread had been revived.

Stealing gym shorts? Puh-lease. Give me some credit. If I really wanted to be mean to you, I'd put fake love notes in your locker from the most popular boy in school.

Have fun at your fake wedding, princess.

squirrly · December 2009

Just so you're aware - I was a nerd in middle school. And not one snotty twit stole my gym shorts. Nor have I ever stolen anyone else's. (Though if I met you after that last post, I might want to light yours on fire.)

Take a step back and re-read what you wrote. Imagine someone else you don't know wrote it. Draw the same conclusions we did? Yeah, thought so.

Am I bugging my guests?

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