Yesterday I stayed home sick, and I had the dogs inside with me most of the day (I always do when I'm home. If I'm not home-Su is inside and Bill is in his Dog run outside, or kennel inside if it's raining.) I decided to put Bill outside and give him free run of the yard while I took a shower.
Half way through my shower I heard these horrible cracks and crashes and the power went out. It was seriously the worst/scariest thunder I've ever heard. So my first thought was oh shat, Bill's outside and he hates loud noises. But I still had soap all over, so I finished my shower (in the dark. It was awkward) and went to let him in, probably 10 minutes had passed since the thunderstorm started.
I'm sure you can guess that he was gone. He had slammed into the back gate hard enough to break the wood and took off. I drove around and looked for him, and finally spotted him but he wouldn't come to me. I could tell he was really scared, he always comes to me, but his tail was between his legs and his eyes were wild. It didn't help that there were sirens all over because of the power outtage. I accidentally stopped and left my truck in front of a power line that'd been hit, and I got chewed out by some firemen...I hadn't even noticed.
Anyways, he headed home and I followed him (I think that's why he headed home, I was scaring him). When I got out of my car there was blood all over my walkway. I opened the door and he came running into the house, bleeding like crazy. He was slipping in his blood, it was so bad. I was freaking out and crying because it was a lot of blood, but he was manic and wouldn't calm down so I could look at him. I finally got him calmed down and checked him out, and he'd run holes in the pads of his two front paws. I called the vet (they were closed, but she was still there, luckily, because she calmed me down) and she said there wouldn't be much that she could do for him anyways, and she told me how to take care of it and keep it clean until they heal.
This morning when I let him out to go to the bathroom was so so sad. He's in so much pain and doesn't even want to walk. It also seems like he's ashamed of himself, which is sort of funny. I just feel awful. It was my fault he was out in the yard in the first place. It seems like I'm always putting him in situations where he can get hurt and I really don't know what I can do with him. There is literally no safe place for him in my entire home. I'm at a loss. He turned two earlier this week, so I was hoping that would be the magic number to calm him down, and he's still on his anxiety meds...I just don't know what to do with him. I feel guilty because it's my job to give him the best life possible, and I'm not doing that.
And now I'm tearing up at my desk and I'm going to stop so hmo doesn't judge me.
