How long was your ceremony?

polichik · July 2010

I'm curious. I've been to ceremonies from 4 minutes to over 90 minutes, so I'm wondering where most of you stand. I'm guessing ours will clock in somewhere between 30-45 minutes, but I could be completely overestimating how long stuff will take.

cougarette · July 2010

I think it was about 20 minutes. We didn't do any readings or songs (besides the processional and recessional of course). We did do a sand ceremony, but that was quick.

wadingmoose · July 2010

We were probably between 15 and 20 minutes.

parker624 · July 2010

have you spoken to your officiant about what kind of things you want in the ceremony?

polichik · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_long-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8962ae54-d2ff-40dd-bda2-e10a22dda93cPost:7ebe73ed-cd4c-4365-8159-47f15071c874">Re: How long was your ceremony?</a>:
[QUOTE]have you spoken to your officiant about what kind of things you want in the ceremony?
Posted by parker624[/QUOTE]

I have the entire thing written out, word for word, with "stage directions" (I used to write plays, ha) except for FI's vows (we're writing our own) and our officiant's speech, which he's keeping a surprise from us. Our officiant is a mutual friend being ordained online, so he just wants us to tell him what to say ;)

danieliza1127 · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_long-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8962ae54-d2ff-40dd-bda2-e10a22dda93cPost:7ebe73ed-cd4c-4365-8159-47f15071c874">Re: How long was your ceremony?</a>:
[QUOTE]have you spoken to your officiant about what kind of things you want in the ceremony?
Posted by parker624[/QUOTE]

I'm pretty sure she has the ceremony planned out already. She has posted it before.

Ours was about 20-25 minutes. We didn't have any readings but we did a sand ceremony and presented roses to our parents.

akmackay · July 2010

We did a full Catholic mass and it was around 40 minutes. Our limo driver said it was the quickest Catholic wedding he's ever driven for. We were very thankful for it being quick!

tenofcups4me · July 2010

I've been married twice and both times the actual ceremony portion was about 10 minutes. For my first wedding, it probably appeared longer because we had an extremely long aisle (out the front door of a mansion, across the porch, down the steps, around a circular drive, several feet of grass and then the actual aisle) so our processional probably took a good 5 minutes or so.

I know this all comes down to personal taste, but I prefer short ceremonies and find them most meaningful. I really hate when there's any kind of sermon or lecture as part of a wedding and I don't personally care for readings, songs, etc. To my mind, the point of the ceremony is to get married and there's not much that has to (or should) go along with that. But I know others feel a short ceremony is kind of a rip-off so it's just personal preference.

parker624 · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_long-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:8962ae54-d2ff-40dd-bda2-e10a22dda93cPost:895d433c-1826-4eef-96d1-fb79fc590c0b">Re: How long was your ceremony?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: How long was your ceremony? : I have the entire thing written out, word for word, with "stage directions" (I used to write plays, ha) except for FI's vows (we're writing our own) and our officiant's speech, which he's keeping a surprise from us. Our officiant is a mutual friend being ordained online, so he just wants us to tell him what to say ;)
Posted by polichik[/QUOTE]

Gotcha. I asked because our rabbi kind of just told us what is going into our wedding ceremony, since we're doing a pretty traditional wedding, and everyone knows from previous weddings at our synagogue how long it takes (ie the wedding planner, photographer, videographer all have a timelime that we created so they know where to be at what time). But because you're creating your own ceremony, it probably isn't that straightforward.

polichik · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_long-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8962ae54-d2ff-40dd-bda2-e10a22dda93cPost:bfd78341-369d-47fb-9f86-0ccf0493930b">Re: How long was your ceremony?</a>:
[QUOTE]We did a full Catholic mass and it was around 40 minutes. Our limo driver said it was the quickest Catholic wedding he's ever driven for. We were very thankful for it being quick!
Posted by akmackay[/QUOTE]

Wow! The 90 minute ceremony I went to was a full Catholic mass. My mom and I were the only non-Catholics there, and we stuck out like sore thumbs during the kneeling/praying bit, and we obviously couldn't take communion.

And mrsjesse, that would be great!

waltzingmatilda13 · July 2010

Ours was about 20 mins including pro/recessional and a sand ceremony. Everyone commented later how it was beautiful and to the point. Exactly what we were going for!

TatiMarie · July 2010

I'm having an Orthodox ceremony and it should be about 45 minutes.

It includes things like blessing of the rings, both drinking wine from the common cup, the B&G wearing the wedding crowns and then walking the table 3 times. It's very symbolic and I'm actually excited for it.

However, our hands will have to be tied together and well...not looking forward to that part because my arm will pretty go numb.

akhensley81 · July 2010

Ours will probably be in the 30-45 minute range... I'm meeting with the church's coordinator on Thursday to set out the "schedule" so I'll know more then. We're having a Catholic ceremony - but not a full Mass, because FI and his family are not Catholic.

My brother's wedding last month was a full Mass, and it was over an hour.

Annie_Warbucks · July 2010

I think ours will be around an hour for the full Catholic mass.

[Deleted User] · July 2010

90 minutes? I'd be bored in my own ceremony if it was that long. I think ours was maybe 15 minutes. The traditional stuff was only 5 minutes or so (saying our vows, exchanging rings), but we also did a blanket ceremony that took 10 minutes, maybe 15, due to the blessings and some technical difficulties in lighting the sage.

anna.oskar · July 2010

Our ceremony was 40 minutes long but everyone said it flew by. Our pastor did a beautiful personalized sermon that wasn't preachy for a second and had the guests rolling with laughter at some points and relatives sobbing with sentimentality at others.

Now, i have been to a few weddings that took forever and were filled with pointless pomp and such that I begged for them to end. The longest was almost 2 hours! I've also been to a 10 minute ceremony that made me question whether it was worth all the driving to the site and dressing church appropriate.

sarabellam · July 2010

Ours was right at an hour. If we were Roman Catholic, it would be considered a full Mass. But since we are Catholic Lite (AKA Espicopalians), we don't use the term "Mass," though the ritual itself is almost identical.

mandysmear · July 2010

I don't get how a wedding can be more than 20-30 minutes long.

wadingmoose · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_long-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8962ae54-d2ff-40dd-bda2-e10a22dda93cPost:7f19da0c-85b0-4514-a5aa-74126480bf17">Re: How long was your ceremony?</a>:
[QUOTE]Our ceremony was 40 minutes long but everyone said it flew by. Our pastor did a beautiful personalized sermon that wasn't preachy for a second and had the guests rolling with laughter at some points and relatives sobbing with sentimentality at others. Now, i have been to a few weddings that took forever and were filled with pointless pomp and such that I begged for them to end. The longest was almost 2 hours! I've also been to a 10 minute ceremony that made me question whether it was worth all the driving to the site and dressing church appropriate.
Posted by anna.oskar[/QUOTE]

Holy carp, it's Anna! How's it going?

Calypso1977 · July 2010

an hour and fifteen.

squirrly · July 2010

Poli, the full text of our ceremony is in my married bio. Start to finish, including the processing and such, was right at 20 minutes, I believe. Maybe a bit less. I thought it would go slower than that. And, honestly - our vows were maybe a bit long. I think people got bored.

Anything longer than about 25 minutes and I think you've done too much. But - were you asking for advice, or as a poll?

wadingmoose · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_long-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8962ae54-d2ff-40dd-bda2-e10a22dda93cPost:f14e2177-1202-4079-9567-4273c876d9b5">Re: How long was your ceremony?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: How long was your ceremony? : If you add a Mass to it, it tacks on a good 30-60 minutes.
Posted by mag920[/QUOTE]

When we did the rehearsal for my brother's wedding, I was surprised they had the bridesmaids seated. I REALLY appreciated that. A lot.

Thankfully, I don't know many Catholics.

JessAndTrav · July 2010

I think someone said ours was 17 minutes long.

We didn't have any readings or special music, and we did the unity candle and communion.

polichik · July 2010

Mostly as a poll, squirrly, although I never mind input!

I feel pretty comfortable with where ours is at right now. I think it'll be a big enough variety of things and that people should be pretty comfortable. I'm also guessing things will go much more quickly than I'm estimating, since I figure it's good to overestimate how long stuff will take.

ETA: The WP will be seated for all but the last 10 minutes, so I think they'll be happy!

ThePinkSuperhero · July 2010

Ours was about an hour. I was hoping it'd be closer to 30 minutes, but we did the full Lutheran mass, so I was dreaming if I thought it would be that short.

frogurt814 · July 2010

Ours was about 15 minutes. One of H's uncles got ordained online a couple of years ago for SIL's wedding. We had him as our officiant, so H and I were able to write the ceremony ourselves.

We had one reading, and we presented roses to our moms, but those were the only extra things that we did.

Simply Fated · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_long-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8962ae54-d2ff-40dd-bda2-e10a22dda93cPost:4382c01d-f580-4985-b289-9b629c69c171">Re: How long was your ceremony?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: How long was your ceremony? : Thankfully, I don't know many Catholics.
Posted by wadingmoose[/QUOTE]
When I first at my friend's invitation, there is a several hour gap between the ceremony and reception... I thought, well, that's kinda rude, considering the reception venue is so close. How long are we supposed to wander around for while they take pictures?

Then, I realized.... oh crap, there's going to be a mass. :( FML.

mandysmear · July 2010

Yeah, I've been to catholic weddings. And even those weren't an hour. In fact half the weddings I've been to were catholic. None were even close to an hour.

danieliza1127 · July 2010

I think the full mass Catholic weddings I've been to were only around 45 minutes to 1 hour. I've never even heard of a 90 minute ceremony, even with full mass, that is insane!

polichik · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_long-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8962ae54-d2ff-40dd-bda2-e10a22dda93cPost:8cd839fc-0df7-453b-87c9-016026d62a8f">Re: How long was your ceremony?</a>:
[QUOTE]I think the full mass Catholic weddings I've been to were only around 45 minutes to 1 hour. I've never even heard of a 90 minute ceremony, even with full mass, that is insane!
Posted by danieliza1127[/QUOTE]

It was the first wedding I'd ever been to as an adult. It was intense. Everybody sang to all the hymns as well, which of course we didn't know! There were honestly 6 or 7 of them.

mandysmear · July 2010

Insane is an understatement. BETTER be a god damn open bar if you make your guests endure that.

How long was your ceremony?

Re: How long was your ceremony?

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