Acquaintance emailed to ask if we have "any parties."

ZRex · July 2010

He literally asked if we have "any parties coming up." I assume parties = wedding? We invited a couple of friends from one group we both hang with, but he and his gf are more periphery type friends, so we didn't invite him.

Best way to let him down easy?

katiewhompus · July 2010

Nope, none at all

rknox88 · July 2010

Weird.

I have no suggestions. Sorry. If this happened to me I would be on this board asking the exact same question.

ZRex · July 2010

I'm at a total loss too! We haven't had anyone "fish" for an invite yet, so this is uncharted territory. We haven't even seen these people in months.

Would it be terrible to just ignore the message and respond after the wedding to say something like, "Sorry, was so caught up in the wedding, blah blah"?

andy71781 · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_acquaintance-emailed-ask-parties?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:2f5c2250-7913-4097-b5bc-2254c81d2567Post:6076b81a-66e7-4cdb-a859-37c173d20a2f">Re: Acquaintance emailed to ask if we have "any parties."</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm at a total loss too! We haven't had anyone "fish" for an invite yet, so this is uncharted territory. We haven't even seen these people in months. Would it be terrible to just ignore the message and respond after the wedding to say something like, "Sorry, was so caught up in the wedding, blah blah"?
Posted by ZRex[/QUOTE]
Nope - that's totally what I would do.

katiewhompus · July 2010

I think that's what I would do Z. Passive aggressive I know, but so be it.

ZRex · July 2010

Yeah, at this point I think ignoring might be better than saying, "sorry we didn't invite you and continue to not invite you."

flyjawn · July 2010

i'd say "no parties, we're too busy planning our wedding".

but then again i'm kind of mean.

LD1970 · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_acquaintance-emailed-ask-parties?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:2f5c2250-7913-4097-b5bc-2254c81d2567Post:00ed16cf-8228-4037-bb0f-1fd764fe8152">Re: Acquaintance emailed to ask if we have "any parties."</a>:
[QUOTE]i'd say "no parties, we're too busy planning our wedding". ;) but then again i'm kind of mean.
Posted by flyjawn[/QUOTE]
I'm kind of like this too.

tonyscutieest09 · July 2010

The world does not revolve around you and your wedding, maybe he really just wanted to know if there was any parties coming up. If their's not just tell him no.

notquiteblushing · July 2010

Do you throw parties often? I would just say "no, we're so busy planning our wedding but hopefully we can catch up soon."

eastunder1 · July 2010

I'm wondering if you are the social hub of your group and/or often throw parties? If so, he could mean "Hey, having any rooftop blowouts anytime soon?"

If no, I would just ignore the email. OR - if you feel bad doing that, write something really obviously vauge like "No, no parties anytime soon. We're so busy lately the next one will probably be for Super Bowl, haha" and forget about it. He should take the hint.

ZRex · July 2010

We actually do entertain more frequently than our other friends, and we haven't thrown a party since the superbowl. I'm torn between writing something vague and just ignoring it for another week and a half. Maybe a response, albeit without an invite, would still hurt his feelings less.

...or maybe he thinks we're just having a party and doesn't realize we're getting married? We don't mention anything on facebook, etc, and we havent seen the guy in at least six months.

squirrly · July 2010

If you haven't seen him in 6 months, I'd ignore the email until after the wedding & honeymoon.

mlands1 · July 2010

Remember that if somebody is fishing for an invitation that they are the rude ones - not you. You should only invite the people you really want there. I certainly intend on not inviting some friends that come out with us, but I don't consider myself close with. I think as someone else suggested you should say something like "we should get together soon" and not mention your wedding. If they straight up ask you then just be honest and say guest list is limited due to family and parents' friends (go ahead and blame it on the parents! haha). But don't feel bad: you're not being rude - they are.

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