Do I buy them a wedding gift?

ootmother2 · May 2010

My best friend from first grade remarried recently in Italy. She's 51 and married a 78 year old retired Catholic priest.

notacluewhattodo

crfische · May 2010

Well isn't that interesting. Crane's didn't cover that one....

kinsey0628 · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_but-wedding-gift?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:31994ecd-29ff-4abb-8957-7f8d81bc0ffePost:6ec8356c-17dc-4f9c-a593-f4033aad4591">Do I buy them a wedding gift?</a>:
[QUOTE] married a 78 year old retired Catholic priest.
Posted by ootmother2[/QUOTE]

you can do that?

you could always just send a card

ootmother2 · May 2010

well, I thought about asking the priest at my church tonight but thought the better of it last minute!

Mrs.B6302007 · May 2010

If OOT doesn't know, then I'm at a loss.

:shrug:

crfische · May 2010

HE may have thought you were coming on to him....

Get 'em some sex toys. Lord knows they'd appreciate it.

I didn't mean to bring the Lord into this....

Mrs.B6302007 · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_but-wedding-gift?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:31994ecd-29ff-4abb-8957-7f8d81bc0ffePost:e921751e-d434-4f98-91f9-35e11c421679">Re: Do I buy them a wedding gift?</a>:
[QUOTE]HE may have thought you were coming on to him.... Get 'em some sex toys. Lord knows they'd appreciate it. I didn't mean to bring the Lord into this....
Posted by crfische[/QUOTE]

Maybe the Magic Bullet would be the gift for this situation.

ootmother2 · May 2010

sex toys are probably a good idea. My guess is that a 78 year old needs all the assistance available.

or perhaps he's back up frokm 50 years of none at all

MyNameIsNot · May 2010

Hmm.. I probably would send a little something. Maybe a fancy wine (if they are local) or something?

Incidentally, I have a distant cousin that was a nun, but left the church and got married when she got knocked up by the priest. Church scandal is fun.

leayn · May 2010

if she's still your friend, regardless of the circumstances of her marriage you should probably acknowledge it as a special event by sending something.

on a side note....maybe he has lots of money and a life insurance policy or something? a 78 year old body is far away from a 51 year old's...there has to be something else to this story that she hasn't shared yet!

jasmineh7777 · May 2010

Ha. I don't know what to send, but I'm glad I opened this thread.

Maybe a rosary and the kama sutra?

ETA: I'm probably going to Hell for that comment.

stellabbella129 · May 2010

Even though their situation seems goofy, I think you should still get them a small gift... It is his first wedding, right?

A bottle of wine seems like a great idea to me!

ootmother2 · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_but-wedding-gift?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:31994ecd-29ff-4abb-8957-7f8d81bc0ffePost:8178df12-169b-47a9-9487-e8eca73f10a9">Re: Do I buy them a wedding gift?</a>:
[QUOTE]Ha. I don't know what to send, but I'm glad I opened this thread. Maybe a rosary and the kama sutra? ETA: I'm probably going to Hell for that comment.
Posted by jasmineh7777[/QUOTE]

the doors of hell just opened for you :)

jasmineh7777 · May 2010

Not if I get to confession first!
But it's been a good 10 years. At this point I think I should just write it all down and hand it to him.

crfische · May 2010

If I started writing now, I could mabe get done by year 2050. MAYBE.

stellabbella129 · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_but-wedding-gift?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:31994ecd-29ff-4abb-8957-7f8d81bc0ffePost:1be35ec6-7efe-4df5-9b8f-21dc8a2fe6d7">Re: Do I buy them a wedding gift?</a>:
[QUOTE]Not if I get to confession first! But it's been a good 10 years. At this point I think I should just write it all down and hand it to him.
Posted by jasmineh7777[/QUOTE]

<div>I abuse confession, jasmineh!</div><div>My priest knows my voice, haha.</div>

jasmineh7777 · May 2010

Do you actually still have the box Stella? Because we just use the cry room.
It is really awkward sitting across from the priest and then confessing. So, I just lie.
And lying to a priest is probably way worse than just not confessing.

stellabbella129 · May 2010

Hahaha! I lied one time and then left, got back in line, and confessed to just having lied to him about my confession. After about 3 minutes I realized he was laughing at me!

We do still have the box with the screen and a line that you have to stand in. It's so awkward waiting because you're like "sooo ::shuffling feet:: what brings you here?"

ootmother2 · May 2010

I should laugh about this all but i'm the last person in the world to make a judgement about someone else's marriage. I beleive it is still banned by the Catholic church but who knows? I don't even know if she got her first marriage annulled after her divorce.

jasmineh7777 · May 2010

If she isn't annulled than the Church won't acknowledge their marriage. I'm not sure if a monsignor can marry or not. Idk if priests take vows like nuns do. Nuns are "brides of Christ" but priests...aren't. Hmm

I wish we had the box still! My previous priest got in trouble for looking at porn (alliteration!) so it wasn't as wierd, because he couldn't judge me. My new priest used to be a monk, and he called me a fornicator.

stellabbella129 · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_but-wedding-gift?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:31994ecd-29ff-4abb-8957-7f8d81bc0ffePost:5f2bddc5-3582-4e9c-a6c0-aea9db9bc82d">Re: Do I buy them a wedding gift?</a>:
[QUOTE]I should laugh about this all but i'm the last person in the world to make a judgement about someone else's marriage. I beleive it is still banned by the Catholic church but who knows? I don't even know if she got her first marriage annulled after her divorce.
Posted by ootmother2[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>I know it's more common than people think. I don't think you get excommunicated if you leave the priesthood and get married, but it is considered adultery if she didn't have her marriage annulled :( So he basically would never be allowed to take the sacrament again, which I think is stupid, but whatever. Maybe he met her and was just "Fuuck the Church! I'm out, bitches!" In that case, it's kind of sweet...</div>

stellabbella129 · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_but-wedding-gift?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:31994ecd-29ff-4abb-8957-7f8d81bc0ffePost:91acb4c2-3b78-4966-9356-d5ad1c80869f">Re: Do I buy them a wedding gift?</a>:
[QUOTE]My new priest used to be a monk, and he called me a fornicator.
Posted by jasmineh7777[/QUOTE]

<div>My grandfather had a bazillion kids and he went to his priest begging him to okay birth control because they couldn't bear to have anymore babies, and the priest called my grandfather "depraved" for wanting to make love to his wife without having more kids. Makes me SICK! </div><div>
</div><div>
</div><div>ETA: Priestly Porn - this would make me feel so much better about confessing some things, haha. My priest is this sweet little man. I wish I had some dirt on him.</div>

jasmineh7777 · May 2010

I am in support of any situation which results in a 78 year old using the phrase, "I'm out bitches."

ootmother2 · May 2010

She's known him for 20 years. I remember her talking about him way back then

jasmineh7777 · May 2010

For the record, he was looking at ADULT WOMEN.
Then they sent him away.

jasmineh7777 · May 2010

So was he her priest before this? That would make this story all the better.

stellabbella129 · May 2010

I guess they consider it onanism, right?

It would make the story more interesting. Like maybe he's loved her for 20 years... Aww I think I like this wedding more and more. Can I send a gift?

ootmother2 · May 2010

They met shortly after her first marriage ended in divorce. They were close friends although IMO, there was more to it even back then.

He was a priest in NYC, she left NYC and moved to D.C. On again, off again and then off.

No idea how it got back on.

I thought it would be rude to just ask if they were waiting for him to retire or what?

stellabbella129 · May 2010

Oh I love this story! I think priests are always priests, but they may retire from running a parish. They have to choose to leave the priesthood though. A lot of them go into teaching?

jasmineh7777 · May 2010

Wow. That is so wrong, and yet if it was a movie, I'd watch it.
I really think that we're going to have to allow priests to marry at some point.

ootmother2 · May 2010

priests were allowed to marry until about the 16th century. I believe the rules were made to protect the property of the Church.

Read about the house of Borgia sometime

Do I buy them a wedding gift?

Re: Do I buy them a wedding gift?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards