More help please ladies!

aegrish · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:143e1578-c810-490d-87ae-8389dfe62de2">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]My question... <strong>Why does everyone care so much?!</strong> Focus on your weddings!!! I understand being on a budge and you can do a DW cheap, my advice <strong>check out the DW board, there is more than just that arent doing big dinners after their wedding! </strong>Just because most weddings do offer a meal doesnt mean you HAVE TO! However I would do something nice for the guests that came, maybe a welcom letter and a little gift or something to thank them for making the trip!
Posted by tiffhiam[/QUOTE]

why does everyone care so much? Because it's super rude to invite guests to a DW and then not host them properly. If you are going to have a cake and punch reception just have the wedding at home where people don't have to take on expenses to travel to the ceremony!!! And OP can't limit the responses to advice on the invitation wording, this is a PUBLIC forum and if posters don't agree with the reception or lack of that OP is planning to host, they certainly don't need to provide advice on wording.

Yes go to the DW board if you want your lack of wedding and hosting etiquette reaffirmed. You obviously won't get it here.

If I received an invitation that said anything in regards to a "non-hosted reception to follow" or "reception at a later date" I would honestly throw it in the trash. My first thought would be that the couple is over-extending themselves and planning a wedding they can already not afford!!!

direy25 · April 2011

That last paragraph is a little harsh, IMO. I mean I'd side-eye that invitation like crazy but I wouldn't throw it in the trash, especially if it was someone close to me...

ahhhitsshannyn · April 2011

Oh goodness, too many things to say to too many people.

Marryingmyknight: For the hundreth time, we ARE giving you advice on your invitation wording. DO NOT DO THEM AT ALL. Like everyone has said, if you physically INVITE them to something, you need to host them.

Breannanicole: Are you kidding me? Why WHY in the world would you throw a big party back at home and do NOTHING for the people who actually made the trip. I don't even like AHR's but if I were you I would do something very nice for my close friends and family that ACTUALLY came to your wedding & reception, and scale back the at home party.

Marryingmyknight, like I said before, you should stick around because you can learn things here, relieve stress, and even make friends. If I had not had this site during my wedding planning, I would have gone crazy. The girls here are very nice and HONEST, do not get that confused. Sometimes you are going to have to step back from "OMGGGG WHAT I WANT!!!" to look at it from what should be done. We actually are a large group of people, trust me the Vegas board is going to be one of the nicest here. Go to the Etiquette board and see what advice you are given there. Our opinions are going to be the consensus.

Good luck with your planning.

kara811 · April 2011

I don't think she wants to stay here anymore. She ran off to the Military Board and changed the story a bit there. She's now having a "cake, champagne, and appetizers" and people here jumped her for having that idea.

Natrasha · April 2011

If I got an invite, especially to a DW, and heard that there was a non-hosted reception or a reception at a later date, I would assume they invited me because they wanted gifts. I would send a card that said "congrats" and feel kind of hurt and maybe a little aghast.

Once you involve other people, you have to take them into consideration with your planning. I'm feeding 50 people for our rehearsal dinner for about $18/per person with Maggianos delivery, and that includes a ton of food. You could probably easily get away with $12/per person. Heck, do a pizza party as some have suggested! There are ways to do something cheap but still make your guests feel appreciated.

There is no way to word your plans on an invitation. That's why you didn't get any advice on how to do that.

aegrish · April 2011

I guess pizza would be better than nothing, but IMO for a DW, I would expect more than Pizza at a reception. I know the guests coming to our wedding would, but maybe there's easier crowds to please.

aegrish · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:c3da7e85-0daa-4ca8-a977-46d4b7fbd06c">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]That last paragraph is a little harsh, IMO. I mean I'd side-eye that invitation like crazy but I wouldn't throw it in the trash, especially if it was someone close to me...
Posted by direy25[/QUOTE]

Ok Ok maybe it was a little harsh. I definitely wouldn't hang it on the fridge though...

ahhhitsshannyn · April 2011

I honestly would not care about Pizza, pollo loco, or even cake & champagne & (hopefully) appetizers. I would just like to mingle and feel like I am not just a free gift to them.

Natrasha · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:05270213-de74-49cf-913d-be4cb6454b0c">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]I guess pizza would be better than nothing, but IMO for a DW, I would expect more than Pizza at a reception. I know the guests coming to our wedding would, but maybe there's easier crowds to please.
Posted by aegrish[/QUOTE]

I sooo agree, but at this point something is better than nothing! It seems that her guests aren't traveling very far, so I feel like she could get away with something less if she had to. I bet you could make a pizza party nice- get a retro looking suite and get some fun decorations and make it like a sock hop with 50s music. SOMETHING.

I feel that there is a way to find a balance between the wedding you want, accomodating your guests, and not going broke without being rude. This chicka just has to find that balance. I hope she does!

tiffhiam · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:c1dda80c-ee6a-44e5-86f2-c36d4c22530c">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: More help please ladies! : why does everyone care so much? <strong> Because it's super rude to invite guests to a DW and then not host them properly</strong>. If you are going to have a cake and punch reception just have the wedding at home where people don't have to take on expenses to travel to the ceremony!!! And OP can't limit the responses to advice on the invitation wording, this is a PUBLIC forum and if posters don't agree with the reception or lack of that OP is planning to host, they certainly don't need to provide advice on wording. Yes go to the DW board if you want your lack of wedding and hosting etiquette reaffirmed. You obviously won't get it here. If I received an invitation that said anything in regards to a "non-hosted reception to follow" or "reception at a later date" I would honestly throw it in the trash. My first thought would be that the couple is over-extending themselves and planning a wedding they can already not afford!!!
Posted by aegrish[/QUOTE]

<div>Who cares! Its not your wedding, once again!!! Just drop it! Yes it is a public forum but you girls are acting like you are in high school! And if you got an invite and didnt like the wording then dont go!!! Once again people do weddings all different ways and just because you dont agree with how she is doing her wedding, its not like she is inviting any of you so just drop it already!!! And just an FYI I recommend the DW board because they do give their opinions just arent rude!</div>

aegrish · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:e3ddc319-6bae-4731-92ab-7fa131e9f206">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: More help please ladies! : Who cares! Its not your wedding, once again!!! Just drop it! Yes it is a public forum but you girls are acting like you are in high school! And if you got an invite and didnt like the wording then dont go!!! Once again <strong>people do weddings all different ways</strong> and just because you dont agree with how she is doing her wedding, its not like she is inviting any of you so just drop it already!!! And just an FYI I recommend the DW board because they do give their opinions just arent rude!
Posted by tiffhiam[/QUOTE]

why do people always use this as an excuse for poor ettiquette. same line always comes in response to posts about putting registry info in invitations. "but MY guests will appreciate knowing where we're registered, we've gotten invitations like that before, everyone does things differently". Ok keep telling yourself that.

tiffhiam · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:7918df7e-09b3-48b6-bb34-09e0ae1f898a">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: More help please ladies! : why do people always use this as an excuse for poor ettiquette. same line always comes in response to posts about putting registry info in invitations. "but MY guests will appreciate knowing where we're registered, we've gotten invitations like that before, everyone does things differently". Ok keep telling yourself that.
Posted by aegrish[/QUOTE]

<div> Obviously you need something more going on in our life, because worrying about someone elses wedding so much is pathetic! Once again not your wedding! And its not my wedding, so move on! </div><div>
</div><div>
</div>

MisEsta · April 2011

If I got an invitation for a close family member or friend, regardless if they are feeding me or not, I would still go. Thats my family or friend that I care about and I would be there for them. And thats what she said, its only close family and friends.
Now if it's for 100's of people then yes it would seem gift grabby (is that even a word?) and it would be rude. But if her family and friends are fine with the situation and still want to attend then, so be it. To me that just says they really do care about her and her fiance. They are not going because of what they can get. They just want to be apart of their special day.

aegrish · April 2011

tiffhiam NO ONE'S WORRIED ABOUT HER WEDDING. We will NOT lose sleep over it. we're not family. we're not guests. we DONT care except to warn her that what she's planning to do isn't fair to her guests. this is a public forum. posting does not mean you have a vested interested in ANYONE'S event or choices. It means you have information, advice or an opinion.

tiffhiam · April 2011

Ok, well she posted on here a few times she wasnt looking for advice on that. So lets all just be done with this post and move on!

Have a great day girls, I have some wedding errands to get done!

aegrish · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:68008043-ab33-468e-9825-c2cf54d8e54c">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]Ok, well she posted on here a few times she wasnt looking for advice on that. So lets all just be done with this post and move on! Have a great day girls, I have some wedding errands to get done!
Posted by tiffhiam[/QUOTE]

You do not get to tell us what and/or when to post. neither does OP. sorry. byebye!

ahhhitsshannyn · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:e3ab5a35-890d-447d-932e-78ec569f6ee4">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]If I got an invitation for a close family member or friend, regardless if they are feeding me or not, I would still go. Thats my family or friend that I care about and I would be there for them. And thats what she said, its only close family and friends. Now if it's for 100's of people then yes it would seem gift grabby (is that even a word?) and it would be rude. But if her family and friends are fine with the situation and still want to attend then, so be it. To me that just says they really do care about her and her fiance. They are not going because of what they can get. They just want to be apart of their special day.
Posted by MisEsta[/QUOTE]

I understand this thinking, but again, no invites are needed for this situation. Do not invite them if you are not hosting them.

apratte3 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:e3ddc319-6bae-4731-92ab-7fa131e9f206">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: More help please ladies! : Who cares! Its not your wedding, once again!!! Just drop it! Yes it is a public forum but you girls are acting like you are in high school! And if you got an invite and didnt like the wording then dont go!!! Once again people do weddings all different ways and just because you dont agree with how she is doing her wedding, its not like she is inviting any of you so just drop it already!!! And just an FYI I recommend the DW board because they do give their opinions just arent rude!
Posted by tiffhiam[/QUOTE]

Amen!

In traditional Balinese cutlure, a wedding reception does not even exist. For those Balinese people who do embrace this western concept - they often invite people to a reception that were not even invited to the ceremony (gasp!).

When I am invited to a wedding - I have no expectations other than what is being told to me. Nor do I toss my nose up at the fact that other people choose to embrace or practice differently based on my values or the values of others. I love a good party - but I love the people I choose to have in my life more. Nothing would make me happier to witness a friends wedding ceremony - regardless of what we do or do not do after the fact.

There is a difference between sharing your opinion, and insisting your opinion and belief is <strong>the way</strong> something should be done. It's also pretty presumptuous to say that the OP's invitees/guests will think her behavior is rude, unacceptable, or unfair.

aegrish · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:de7e3eae-12bf-4f4a-a80d-4a4f067692b5">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: More help please ladies! : Amen! In traditional Balinese cutlure, a wedding reception does not even exist. For those Balinese people who do embrace this western concept - they often invite people to a reception that were not even invited to the ceremony (gasp!). When I am invited to a wedding - I have no expectations other than what is being told to me. Nor do I toss my nose up at the fact that other people choose to embrace or practice differently based on my values or the values of others. I love a good party - but I love the people I choose to have in my life more. Nothing would make me happier to witness a friends wedding ceremony - regardless of what we do or do not do after the fact. There is a difference between sharing your opinion, and insisting your opinion and belief is the way something should be done. It's also pretty presumptuous to say that the OP's invitees/guests will think her behavior is rude, unacceptable, or unfair.
Posted by apratte3[/QUOTE]

perhaps she should just word the invitation to say she is having a Balinese reception!

MisEsta · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:357d484d-1f11-40cc-914a-2ef3e76d073b">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: More help please ladies! : perhaps she should just word the invitation to say she is having a Balinese reception!
Posted by aegrish[/QUOTE]

Hahaha!!

ahhhitsshannyn · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:de7e3eae-12bf-4f4a-a80d-4a4f067692b5">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: More help please ladies! : Amen! In traditional Balinese cutlure, a wedding reception does not even exist. For those Balinese people who do embrace this western concept - they often invite people to a reception that were not even invited to the ceremony (gasp!). When I am invited to a wedding - I have no expectations other than what is being told to me. Nor do I toss my nose up at the fact that other people choose to embrace or practice differently based on my values or the values of others. I love a good party - but I love the people I choose to have in my life more. Nothing would make me happier to witness a friends wedding ceremony - regardless of what we do or do not do after the fact. <strong>There is a difference between sharing your opinion, and insisting your opinion and belief is the way something should be done</strong>. It's also pretty presumptuous to say that the OP's invitees/guests will think her behavior is rude, unacceptable, or unfair.
Posted by apratte3[/QUOTE]

Did I miss where the OP said that she was doing this because of cultural beliefs?? I think not, I think I read "I know this i rude but I am doing it anyway"

And the bold part it not an opinion, it is etiquette. You invite someone to a wedding, you host them. Done deal.

I don't care if her guests think her behavior is unacceptable, but I would NEVER go out of my way to do something to my closest friends and family when I already knew it was rude. Why would anyone treat their friends and family that way, oh yeah because they are acting like a brat and only care about "MY day"

apratte3 · April 2011

I find it hysterical that a group of people will go on and on about manners, etiquette, and traditions in the way that is occuring here. If you speak about manners, without having manners, your point is lost.

smokeybailey · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:de7e3eae-12bf-4f4a-a80d-4a4f067692b5">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: More help please ladies! : Amen! In traditional Balinese cutlure, a wedding reception does not even exist. For those Balinese people who do embrace this western concept - they often invite people to a reception that were not even invited to the ceremony (gasp!). When I am invited to a wedding - I have no expectations other than what is being told to me. Nor do I toss my nose up at the fact that other people choose to embrace or practice differently based on my values or the values of others. I love a good party - but I love the people I choose to have in my life more. Nothing would make me happier to witness a friends wedding ceremony - regardless of what we do or do not do after the fact. There is a difference between sharing your opinion, and insisting your opinion and belief is the way something should be done. It's also pretty presumptuous to say that the OP's invitees/guests will think her behavior is rude, unacceptable, or unfair.
Posted by apratte3[/QUOTE]

Oh, Apratte, really? Would you really be totally okay with showing up for a wedding and then paying your own way to dinner? I love my family and friends but if someone did that I'd think, "Wow...why did she have me come all the way out to Vegas to pay my own way." A friend invited us to a birthday party in Vegas at Alex at the Wynn and I would have been aghast if he had asked me to pony up for my portion of the bill. Dude, you invited ME. How awkward for your guests and for you.

Obviously, I have to agree to disagree with you. I just don't think it is appropriate to invite guests to an affair and ask them to pay their own way, ESPECIALLY when they have paid for transportation, hotel, per diem, etc.

And that is that.

apratte3 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:42029ce7-0a08-45eb-b5af-59068ff9cb01">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: More help please ladies! : Oh, Apratte, really? Would you really be totally okay with showing up for a wedding and then paying your own way to dinner? I love my family and friends but if someone did that I'd think, "Wow...why did she have me come all the way out to Vegas to pay my own way." A friend invited us to a birthday party in Vegas at Alex at the Wynn and I would have been aghast if he had asked me to pony up for my portion of the bill. Dude, you invited ME. How awkward for your guests and for you. Obviously, I have to agree to disagree with you. I just don't think it is appropriate to invite guests to an affair and ask them to pay their own way, ESPECIALLY when they have paid for transportation, hotel, per diem, etc. And that is that.
Posted by smokeybailey[/QUOTE]

The only expectation I have when I receive a wedding invitation, is a wedding. If a reception is to follow - excellent! If a reception does not follow - that is okay too. When a friend, regardless of the occassion, invites me out somewhere - I never assume the invitee is covering my expenses unless they explicitely state so.

I dont think there is a right and a wrong here. Each person is entitled to their opinion...I just think there is a respectful way to deliver your opinions. And that has not consistently happened here. Although, being respectful to other people may not be important to those people - and if that is the case, alrighty then! I will adjust my expectations of certain individuals and be more prepared for the way they will likely behave.

aegrish · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:fc122ca2-8030-4462-998a-2ea859991f5a">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: More help please ladies! : The only expectation I have <strong>when I receive a wedding invitation, is a wedding.</strong> If a reception is to follow - excellent! If a reception does not follow - that is okay too. When a friend, regardless of the occassion, invites me out somewhere - I never assume the invitee is covering my expenses unless they explicitely state so. I dont think there is a right and a wrong here. Each person is entitled to their opinion...I just think there is a respectful way to deliver your opinions. And that has not consistently happened here. Although, being respectful to other people may not be important to those people - and if that is the case, alrighty then! I will adjust my expectations of certain individuals and be more prepared for the way they will likely behave.
Posted by apratte3[/QUOTE]

and the "lowered expectations" song from MAD TV is playing in my head now....

MNVegas · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:fb864173-3010-4671-8a70-728d4bed8459">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]. I<strong> hope we can get pass all this and I can get the good advice and make friends but at this rate I don't think so</strong>. Good Luck to all. Posted by MarryingmyKnight[/QUOTE]

It's your comments like this that just keep fanning the flames!

MarryingmyKnight · April 2011

Ma'am I would have to disagree. I will leave this alone though because as I said I would like to move on. Thank you!

MNVegas · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_please-ladies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:998584e8-1ca6-4bce-b8ad-7a0906fdc241Post:1612b286-18dd-4c3c-b5c2-2080481b29c1">Re: More help please ladies!</a>:
[QUOTE]Ma'am I would have to disagree. I will leave this alone though because as I said I would like to move on. Thank you!
Posted by MarryingmyKnight[/QUOTE]

You just proved my point!!

wiwicaty · April 2011

First of all - Shannyn, are you mad at me? (hope not)

Then - Let me ask you something ladies (no sarcasm here, honest question) if OP and other posters who are considering doing a non-hosted reception and actually do it, how do they make it work? I mean, who picks the place?

I'm asking because, if I ever happen to invite myself to someone's wedding (not likely, but let's assume) and know I have to pay for my own meal I'd probably just leave after the ceremony and go have dinner/lunch where I see fit. Makes sense? I don't know... I could never welcome people to my wedding ceremony and then tell them where to join us for a celebratory meal and let them pay. Not because it's rude (it is) but because I couldn't find it in me to sit at a table with people I love and watch them split the bill, the tip and making awkward calculations... how embarrassing! how cheap of me! how not lady-like!

Anyways, I'm confused by a number of things here... I thought an elopement was supposed to be kept secret... eloping and telling people you're getting married is confusing... at least to me. Am I misinformed? I think OP should have stuck to her elopement plan very strictly and maybe added the online ceremony broadcast for good measure... really where do you find the heart to let people show you such affection and not pay for them as they sit to celebrate with you? I think that when someone "insists" on coming to your wedding ceremony he/she is expressing a great deal of love/friendship to you... don't you want to reciprocate? That's probably where the point of etiquette lies. The word as it's intended nowadays takes away from the original noble feeling, but I think it must be that your guests show you their love by attending, you show them your love by receiving (them).

On a side note, I agree 100% with Natrasha who said that if she ever received an invitation with a non-hosted reception or one at a later date I would like a gift is being squeezed out of me. That invitation could come from my best friend, I would go, get her something from her registry but I admit in all honesty, I'd still think that.

ahhhitsshannyn · April 2011

Of course I am not mad at you Wiwi! People called Harry Potter a freak and look where he is now!!!!! (Sorry, my nerd is showing)

But yes, you have brought up another issue that I know I thought of in another thread like this. I would not be able to sit there, in my wedding dress, seeing everyone split up the bill. Not only would I feel like and idiot watching my friends do this, people in the restaurant would I am sure give me the side-eye for it.

As for the choosing the place, I know for a fact that I am picky, and if we are paying, we for sure want to go somewhere that we would love. Say, the non paying bride & groom want to go to the seafood buffet, we would surely back out and spend our money on someplace we would like. That also goes for say, the Eiffel Tower restaurant, we would bow out because we know it is too pricey for us. So now how would the OP feel if people just left them right after their 5 minute ceremony, I bet she would feel hurt, but there would be nothing she could do.

If one of my best friends or close family did this to me, sure I would go, but like wiwi and natrasha, I would still be weirded out by it. Why invite me? Free gifts? Its not like any of us EXPECT anything from a wedding, but even still especially for a DW, we would like to be thought of more like a friend rather than a $ sign.

More help please ladies!

Re: More help please ladies!

Choose Another Board

Search Boards