NWR: How to strike a balance between professional and friendly at work

Re: NWR: How to strike a balance between professional and friendly at work

• ski2play member

  

  February 2012 edited February 2012

  holy back and forth from your boss Achid.  That is a hard one since each work environment is different.  I understand your confusion.  Since chatting and professionalism are both a perception based on those involved, I would do one of two things.
  
  1) Have a conversation with your boss referencing both conversations and let him /her lay the groundrules.
  
  or
  
  2) Find a middle ground between the way your coworkers and yourself acted 6 months ago and how you are acting now. 

  

  Report0 Reply
• StephBeanWed61502 member

  

  February 2012

  First off, holy mixed-messages! 
  
  My trick is to limit my socializing to times when one of my bosses is socializing - that way, I'm still being "friendly," but they can't accuse me of over-chatting, since I only join conversations they start.  It seems to be working so far.

  my to-read shelf:
  

  Report0 Reply
• adamar15 member

  

  February 2012

  I just don't talk to anyone if I don't have to.  I realize that's not really helpful, sorry.

  
  
  "Halloween may have loose women scantily clad...
  But Christmas has a pregnant virgin.
  
  Way cooler." - anna.oskar

  Report0 Reply
• StephBeanWed61502 member

  

  February 2012

  FWIW, it sounds to me like your boss thought he wanted a "more professional" environment, and has now realized that a "serious" workplace is too boring and buttoned-up for his taste.

  my to-read shelf:
  

  Report0 Reply
• achiduck member

  

  February 2012

  It's a very frustrating situation. We're a small office (9 employees including my boss), we're all friendly with each other and some of us socialize outside of work from time to time.
  
  Plus 90% of the employees are off site at least 4 out of 5 days so my only interaction with them is usually over the phone or via Skype. My boss is only in the office about a half day a week so I'm not really sure how he's noticed any of this. When everyone is in the office we all usually go out for lunch and I'm my normal friendly, chatty self.
  
  Steph - I'll try your trick and see how it goes.

  
  

  Report0 Reply
• sparent2010 member

  

  February 2012

  The only reason I am any good at my job is because I am good at talking to people. I have actually invested time into getting to know my cellmates and since I have a base relationship I can ask them for any support I need.
  
  This is something that is needed in my field where most people have a personality ranging between a rock and a wet towel.
  
  My manager commends us for getting to know others and being approachable. Idk I kinda have certain times of down time that I go and chat with people and while it is not always work related a lot of times it is.
  
  This was not really helpful... just be approachable and talk with people when you are not busy. But the others brought up a good point talk with your boss to see what their expectation is.

  

  

  Report0 Reply
• entropicbeauty member

  

  February 2012

  I can't imagine NOT being able to talk to my co-workers. Makes the days go by quicker and makes for a happier work environment!
  
  I agree with PP that you should talk to your boss about what his "exact expectations" are for communicating with co-workers because of the mixed messages.

  

  Report0 Reply
• soontobemrsep

  

  February 2012

  I would be straight-forward with my boss and simply say, "We had a conversation a few months back where you mentioned that I was being too chatty, I scaled my chatting back and now I'm coming across as too professional. What would you suggest I do to get a happy balance between the two?"
  I'd rather have clarification than try to guess each month what my boss may want. There's a chance your boss doesn't remember even making mention of your chattyness before and this will refresh his memory and make him aware of the mixed signals!
  I for one enjoy talking to my coworkers during down time, but when I have a project on my desk and a deadline to meet I'm all business. It's tricky!

  Report0 Reply